Divided Life
by Bao Blossom
Summary: REPOSTED Thinking nothing was left from her life before Naraku, the appearance of an old friend shocks and worries not only Sango, but Miroku as well. SM Finished
1. Prologue

Wooohooooooo!!!!!!!! I'm back! *yay!* I know it took me long enough and I know most of my first time readers are and should be very upset and I don't blame em at all. I had a little fall a while back and it hurt like hell, emotionally that is. And unfortunately it took something painful to wake me up. And some ass kickin by some of my readers. But I deserved nothing less. And for the small pats on the back I thank you all and of course for your glorious ability to have patience, so blah blah, sorry, blah blah, I'm back, blah blah enough!  
  
I edited the whole story again and made minor changes on every chapter for the best I hope. So as I had explained before I will be uploading the story again chapter by chapter until I get to the end which turned out nothing like I had imagined but I hope it'll please you. I put in a small prologue if ya didn't notice :P  
  
Now! I promise I'm done talking, without further adew(sp?!) "The Life Before!" once again and for the last time!  
  
*parenthesis* for those of you first time readers forget my gibberish above and enjoy! And yes... I am insane *sweet smile*  
  
The Life Before  
  
Prologue  
  
It had been almost two weeks. He didn't really expect to take that long. The job itself was quite simple. But he loved to wander and there had been so many interesting towns on the way. He had always loved to travel but was certainly glad to be back home. After the second day of journey he got a funny feeling at the bottom of his stomach, which made the whole trip a bit uneasy. Actually he would have been out on the road a little longer if that feeling hadn't come up. Approaching the large gates of the fortress surrounding his home he felt his stomach clench.  
  
Half of it was destroyed. He looked in disbelief to where he had left a vivid colorful town. Burned or broken, it was now left discovered and unprotected. Gripping his weapon tightly he dropped his souvenirs hearing them clink on the floor before he ran up to what used to be the entrance of the best guarded fort in the territory.  
  
"Yumi..." he whispered jumping over the fallen logs.  
  
Blue eyes widened in shock. He didn't even feel himself land as he looked over a sight that had to be impossible.  
  
The buildings and houses he grew up amongst were now reduced to piles of ashes and debris. Hordes of monsters mutilated and slashed lay spattered in too much blood to be just their own. It was brown and flaky, dirt had settled amongst everything. This battle had happened a while back. Weapons, some familiar, some new, as abundant as the monsters lay upon the paths, houses and monsters everywhere.  
  
"Na-ni...?" clutching black hair in one hand and his weapon in the other, he took a step back, finding it suddenly very hard to breath.  
  
This couldn't be happening. It had to be some sort of sick nightmare. He couldn't be seeing this. It made no sense!  
  
"No!!" He ran into the village towards his home. He would get there to be received by his mother, who would no doubt scold him for taking so long. Yumi would come out of the kitchen with her usual smile greeting him cheerfully. Right?  
  
Turning the 'familiar' corner of his street he rushed towards the ruins of his house. It was half gone. The smell of burnt wood and flesh still lingered lightly as he kicked away the debris of his front door.  
  
"Okaa-san?!" he yelled at the silence  
  
"Yumi!"  
  
It was hopeless. Some part of his mind already knew what he wasn't willing to except. This didn't stop him however from rummaging through the ruins trying to find the least sign of life. Nothing but the corpse of a snake youkai lay over the kitchen floor covered in drying blood.  
  
Where was everyone?! He ran out of the house again looking toward his next destination, the leader's house at the very top of the hill. Was this some sick joke? Nothing but destruction and massacre surrounded him as he ran with glossy eyes across the town he once loved. But it didn't go unnoticed that he had not seen a single human body.  
  
The dirt under his feet was lifted by the streak of his sudden stop.  
  
He couldn't breath.  
  
His weapon made a small thunk as it hit the ground. There, on the southern boundary of his town, where the things he had been dreading to see since he saw the gate half destroyed.  
  
Graves. Endless graves that went on till he dare see. Dropping to his knees he could do nothing but stare at cross after cross after cross. Images passed before his eyes. His mother scolding him for something. Yumi laughing cheerfully.  
  
Brown eyes came to his mind. Timid and kind brown eyes accompanied by a shy smile and long chocolate locks.  
  
"Sango..." he barely whispered as a lone tear made its way down his cheek  
  
"I hope you see her again when you die."  
  
The adrenaline in his body acted up at once as he quickly reached for his weapon and turned to face the voice that had spoken such words. This person had to know what had happened. Maybe was even responsible for it! Yet he turned to find nothing but the silence of death all around him.  
  
"Fool."  
  
Before he could so much as turn to the source, a blinding pain in his back pushed him forward sending him crashing against a destroyed home. He let out a scream trying to recover from both the impact and the searing pain that spread all over his back. Reaching through the rummage of the house he came across the handle of his weapon.  
  
What the hell was all of this?! Why did this happen? Who caused it? Unfortunately, all he would do would be grip his weapon tightly before another endless wave of pain blocked his senses leaving him unconscious under the pile of the remaining house.  
  
'This... can't be right...' his mind cursed before being swallowed by darkness  
  
"So much fun is yet to come!" the voice taughnted disappearing into nothing once again.  
  
~~*°*~~  
  
Heh! Don't worry although most of you new time readers didn't understand, this nameless character will be in the first chapter, be patient. And for my veterans, if ya don't know who it is I'll kill myself!  
  
Ma! Hope you enjoyed Review please! No flames ne? 


	2. Past Encounter

Decided to upload both of these today. Why? Because thanks to a glorious action from a friend how what living in Guadalajara with me I now have no internet ¬¬ the nearest café is not near and at school I have to wait for about an hour to be called to use a computer which is just about the amount of time I have off. So I'll be doing it as often as I can. I do have all of the chapters already so no need to worry I won't take a year.... again ja! Ehem *nervous giggle*  
  
Anywho here we go again... ^^  
  
¬¬ ah yes, I almost forgot to mention I'm just a bored girl with nothing whatsoever to do who enjoys the occasional fic,  
  
-_-' I don't even see why these things are necessary. "Oh yes my name is Betty and I own all of the Inu-Yasha characters, I'm so rich and famous sometimes I get bored of my glamorous wonderful life and go to a place where people write fan fictions about my cartoons and write one myself!"  
  
........... ¬¬ come on now people!!!  
  
Respect and admiration to Takahashi-sama.... -_-' dammit I can't even do a normal disclaimer......... let's try again......  
  
I own nothing!!!! ................................. *runs away sobbing*  
  
~ Past Encounter ~  
  
He sniffed the air while running "Are you sure it's this way Kagome?" asked Inu-Yasha  
  
Kagome nodded from over his back already preparing her bow and arrows. "About three shards."  
  
"Then we must hurry." Voiced Miroku from Kirara's back along with Sango  
  
Inu-Yasha felt the adrenaline rush through his veins, it had been a long while since they had had a lead on so many shards at once, sine Naraku had taken care of almost all of them, few were left to recollect, and they had to take advantage of each chance they got.  
  
Something shot through the trees with amazing speed scattering the group quite suddenly. The slimy vine like extension squirmed through the trees before returning back to it's beholder. Inu-Yasha perked up, he smelled something other than the youkai.  
  
"There's a human."  
  
Finally reaching the clearing, they came upon the most disgusting creature they had seen yet, at least in Sango's opinion. It looked like an upside down sake bowl with greasy slimy tentacles. And underneath one was, just as Inu-Yasha had said, a human.  
  
Inu-Yasha having set Kagome down took out Tetsusaiga and lunged at the beast. It simply looked up or at least rose the part of it's body where four slimy balls of red goop were incrusted, and let Inu-Yasha slice through it, sticking itself back together with Inu-Yasha along the way.  
  
"Inu-Yasha!" cried Kagome.  
  
The hanyou was looking, more than in trouble, highly disgusted and somewhat pissed inside the youkai's body. He managed to break out screaming very colorful words at the beast. Still the man under the tentacle gave a yelp as electricity surged from the youkai's body to all of its tentacles.  
  
Miroku still from above Kirara had noticed Sango hadn't moved sine they had seen the creature. The only other time something like this had happened was the first time she saw her brother after his 'death'. Or, was she afraid? Not able to believe that this could be the cause of her lack of action, he leapt off the feline beast and looked back to Sango who did not follow. She was instead staring in shock at the beast, but more specifically... He followed her line of sight, to the man pinned below its tentacles.  
  
Not knowing why this caused a void to form in his stomach he barely had time to turn before Sango was rushing faster than he had ever seen her move towards the beast, Hiraikotsu raised over her shoulder.  
  
She took a fearful swipe at the beast followed by a deep slash of her katana at the tentacle that was holding the stranger down. As soon as she landed again she took out a familiar seashell container passing the blade of her sword through the blue powder. She dodged an electrified tentacle as another approached behind her. Looking back she saw the tentacle crackle with blue energy rushing towards her. A familiar ofuda landed on the gooey skin stinging and crippling the limb. It was all the time Sango needed. She jumped high in the air throwing her sword at the beast like a harpoon. It cringed and shrieked in pain. Miroku did nothing more but follow her with his eyes then looked towards everyone else in the group. As he suspected they had similar expressions, never had they seen Sango battle this fiercely against anyone but Naraku before.  
  
"Hiraikotsu!" Sango yelled.  
  
The youkai didn't even see the giant boomerang as it sliced cleanly through its drying skin, once when she threw it, and another as it came back. The monster, being as it wasn't the most stable creature there was, exploded after the second impact with the giant boomerang, onto everything and every one.  
  
Sango clutched the returning slime filled Hiraikotsu expertly the way only she knew while Kagome and Shippou looked disgustedly at themselves covered in greenish warm mucus. Inu-Yasha wasn't too happy either, as this melting flesh didn't exactly smell like roses. Miroku on the other hand, although covered in the gross substance was oblivious.  
  
Kagome caught sight of the monk, ofudas still out and ready, and like him, stared back at Sango whose hair was plastered against her back and face. That had been one of the most impressive displays of Sango's abilities with youkai's probably since they had met her. She had fought with her heart and spirit... but why?  
  
"Shinosuke!!" she yelled at the recovering victim of the beast.  
  
He perked up at the sound of her voice and looked up at the name she had given him. Both stared at each other for the longest time. Sango, still trying to catch her breath with Hiraikotsu still in hand. The young man, looking at her with a mix of fascination, confusion and somewhat disbelief. Inu-Yasha along with everyone else simply stared from one to the other, waiting for someone to make the first move. Miroku didn't take his eyes off Sango. The silence was finally broken when the stranger said something no one but Sango was expecting.  
  
"Sango? Jou-chan?"  
  
At that moment Kagome could have sworn she felt the air crack around Miroku. Possibly the use of a nickname by the stranger for his Sango? Sango on the other hand looked as if she had just defeated Naraku, her lips turned up into a smile which was then invaded by a quivering lip and sad eyes. She dropped her weapon and ran to the man. Miroku took an involuntary step forward as she leapt into this man's open arms.  
  
Shinosuke, as Sango had called him swung her around twice before setting her down and digging himself into her shoulder. She clutched his gi tightly and dug her head into his chest where she was apparently crying. Inu-Yasha looked surprised at the couple; Sango was never a gal to show much affection to anyone, at least to anyone in their own group. Kagome was trying really hard not to smile like an idiot at the tender scene before her; Shippou had simply been staring curiously at his friend and the stranger she seemed to know.  
  
Miroku was a different story. Just by looking at him you couldn't tell there was something like fire running through his very soul that angered, and hurt him at the same time. His face was calm and motionless, the only thing that gave him away was the way his eyes gleamed longingly at the couple before him. That, and the creepy aura he was giving off.  
  
Kagome turned to him, knowing better than to trust his physical expressions. The air seemed to vibrate off his skin, unconsciously making her take a step back towards Inu-Yasha. And she knew it wasn't just her imagination because Inu-Yasha turned like her, well aware of the negative energy the houshi was sending off. Inu-Yasha looked curiously at Miroku. This jealousy was particular... he recognized it immediately... it was territorial.  
  
It seemed like an eternity before Sango finally let go of the stranger, with tears streaming down her face mixed with the gooey substance of the youkai. This was the first time Kagome had ever seen her so happy, she was practically glowing. The young man it seemed was in a similar state, a huge smile adorned his quite handsome face as he looked down at her.  
  
"I can't believe it. Is it really you Jou-chan?"  
  
Sango laughed wetly looking up at him and nodding.  
  
"You're alive. And you. You saved me. What are you doing here?"  
  
"I should." Sango started but found her voice cracked easily. She cleared her throat and tried again "I should ask you that question. I thought you had..."  
  
His smile died down faintly to reveal sad eyes, Sango too became solemn knowing what their next topic would be.  
  
Kirara, who had been at Miroku's side since the incident, shrunk back to her cat form and rushed at the couple.  
  
"Kirara!" called Shinosuke gleefully as the small youkai leapt up to his arms and stroked her face against his cheek. "You're here as well?"  
  
Sango smiled again sharing her pet's joy still trying to get it in her head that this was really happening. She couldn't believe it, it was as if her best friend had come back from the dead. Still she needed to find out why he was alive. A familiar feeling of dread overcame her as she vaguely remembered her brother. She shook her head. 'Not now'  
  
The memory came back clearly now. Shino had been called out for a mission in a village up north a few days before the whole Naraku incident had happened. He hadn't returned when the attack occurred. She was surprised she didn't remember, not even half a year had passed after all, but it seemed her history before Inu-Yasha and her new friends was distant now, even if it hadn't been that long ago.  
  
She still had trouble believing it, as nothing good could ever happen to her without it turning horribly wrong from one second to another.  
  
"I'm so glad you're alive Jou-chan..."  
  
His voice broke her train of thoughts. She looked back up at deep sky blue eyes and let his words sink in, then smiled. "Me too Shino..."  
  
The sound of someone's throat being cleared made them both turned followed by the scowl of Kagome  
  
"Inu-Yasha! Mind the moment will you?"  
  
Sango smiled looking up at her friends; taking Shinosuke's hand she led him to where everyone was 'patiently' waiting.  
  
"Gomen minna... I guess I got a bit carried away..." she explained to her friends.  
  
Kagome smiled and simply shook her head looking the stranger over; she lifted an eyebrow as one word came to her mind. 'Nice...' the young man was tall, probably about Miroku's age, with chilly ice blue eyes, short black hair with thick locks coming over a bit of his eyes.... even though now they were covered in mucus. He had on a navy blue gi, and a plain black hakama. Still, dirty, bruised and covered in youkai remainders... he managed to look really good.  
  
"Shinosuke." Sango started looking at her friends "These are the people who now mean the world to me. This is Kagome, she comes from the future."  
  
Kagome stepped forward and shook the hand of the boy "Higurashi Kagome, very nice to meet you."  
  
Shinosuke seemed a little off by the future thing; he looked down at Sango who simply smiled. Maybe she would explain later... "Shippou is a small kitsune who travels with us," she continued. The mentioned waved energetically at Shinosuke from Kagome's shoulder.  
  
"Hello Shippou."  
  
"Hi! Where do you know Sango from Shinosuke-san?"  
  
"We lived in the same village and met when we were seven."  
  
"Five..." corrected Sango  
  
"You were five... I was seven..." he defended  
  
She smiled and waved her hand nonchalantly "Hai hai... That's Inu- Yasha, in case the dog ears and fangs and the white hair didn't give it away. He's a Hanyou."  
  
Inu-Yasha turned indignantly with a familiar 'feh'. Sango smiled. "You'll get used to him. And. Miroku-sama," the mentioned turned at his name. It had to be the first time he or anyone for that matter had ever heard Sango say his name. Too bad it was under these circumstances. "He's a houshi." Miroku somewhat expected her to go on. She didn't.  
  
"Minna this is Shinosuke, a....... dear friend, from my village."  
  
That pause definitely didn't go unnoticed by anyone.  
  
"It's very nice to meet all of you, really, thank you very much for your help. I probably wouldn't have made it on my own back there."  
  
At some point Shinosuke had looked over to Sango and said the last part to her, which was probably only fair as she had more or less taken out the youkai by herself.  
  
"Oh! I almost forgot." the voice of Kagome attracted everyone's attention before she ran to the place where the youkai had exploded, digging a bit in the sand she recovered two shards, odd, she had sensed three earlier on, brushing away the dirt she wondered if she had missed one when something gleamed below her fingers, she tightened her grip on the thing.  
  
"Ouch!" she took a dirty finger covered with blood to her mouth. A second later she turned blue tasting the horrible gooey thing that had dried up on her finger.  
  
Shinosuke perked up and ran beside her "Oh I'm sorry Kagome-san that must be my Niken." He said lifting the object off the floor.  
  
"Niken? Oh my." said Kagome staring at the weapon  
  
Indeed, both of the boy's hands reached the slightest bit towards their own weapon when they saw the 'Niken'. It was about the size of Shinosuke himself, a double bladed staff of some sort. With very large blades.  
  
"God damn... You couldn't beat the youkai with that thing?" asked Inu- Yasha still admiring the weapon  
  
A gleam of uncertainty crossed Shinosuke's face before he smiled and turned back to Sango.  
  
"We should really get cleaned up. If this dries up it will be impossible to get off." He said to everyone.  
  
Kagome stood up and nodded at the suggestion realizing again that she was covered in something gooey and disgusting. "But we haven't seen a village in days, Shinosuke. Do you know of any near here?"  
  
"Villages? I've been traveling myself. But I left the last about a week ago. I was heading south to another one but it's about a days way. I did however see some nice thermal ponds close by. If you like I could take you there."  
  
"Kya! Warm waters are just what we need!" Smiled Kagome.  
  
Shinosuke smiled strapping his swallow over his shoulder with a leather strap much like the one Sango used for Hiraikotsu. He searched the grounds a bit before heading over to recover a cloth pouch just like Sango's, who promptly jogged along to where Shinosuke was, taking a comfortable position by his side.  
  
"Are they far away?" she asked him  
  
"No, at a good pace we should be there before dusk."  
  
Sango nodded, and looked casually up at the afternoon sky, and then to the forest floor covered in leaves... they would have to speak of it sometime. She knew this, but it was very uncomfortable for her to just blurt out, "Hey you want to know who massacred our village?" she had a bit more common sense than that, still no ideas came to her head on how to board the topic. Luckily for her, he started  
  
"How did you survive Jou-chan...?"  
  
She looked up at her friend who was staring fiercely at nothing "I came back to the village to find nothing but graves where I had left my friends and loved ones. In less that a day I had been left with nothing."  
  
She took in a deep sigh knowing she had a lot of explaining to do. "Shino... the village wasn't attacked by accident... that's the first thing you have to know. It was a trap, set up by a powerful demon called Naraku." He sensed the rage as she said the name.  
  
"A trap... to kill the villagers? Why?"  
  
Sango nodded. "It was planned from a start... Kohaku, who came in your absence, my father, Ryu- san, Kenji-san, Eiji-san, Notaro-san and myself were sent to a palace that was in need of the best exterminators we had. Meanwhile the village was left unprotected, it couldn't resist the horde of monsters 'he' sent to destroy it... all this to get a single shard of the Shikon Jewel I had recovered. I'll explain later why it was reduced to shards. Meanwhile back at the palace, we found ourselves with nothing more than a giant spider I took out easily, I sensed it had been to easy... that's when he attacked." She took in some air "The dirty bastard didn't get a drop of blood on his filthy body."  
  
Shino looked over at Sango's trembling figure with a feeling of guilt build up inside. He could help think that it should have been him, not Sango's brother. He was still a kid. The expression on her face mellowed as she continued.  
  
"It was Kohaku's first mission, and I couldn't save him. I couldn't do a thing..."  
  
Sango took in deep solid breaths hating her cursed memories, every time she thought of this frustration seemed to eat her from the inside, and she could do nothing but clench her fists. She felt a large rough hand come down gently over hers.  
  
"But you haven't give up... it is because of that that you're alive isn't it?" he said softly to her.  
  
She looked up to him with sad eyes and exhaled deeply.  
  
Miroku hated this feeling, he knew it was incongruous, pointless, uncalled for. But frankly he couldn't do anything about it. He decided the least he could do was not stare at them, which was difficult as he had to be following them. Miroku took a place at the very end of the line behind Kagome and Inu-Yasha, who were also watching the couple intently, no doubt eavesdropping. He just wished he would let go of her hand...  
  
~~*~~  
  
¬¬ hmmmm, this was the boring chapter, the next one definitely gives a new twist to the story, and BTW, for those of you who have seen Rurouni Kenshin fics, well you know where I got the Jou-chan from, it means little lady or little missy or something along those lines, and for those of you familiar with Chrono Cross you know where Shinosuke's weapon comes from.... kinda copying Serge's swallow. As for the name Niken........ Hell I don't know! It just came to my head!  
  
Anywho stick around for the next chapter -_-' promise it'll get better.... I hope a week isn't too long a wait...!  
  
Review! I need to know what I'm doing!!! 


	3. Hana

Well minna, in a few short hours I'll be on a bus to Guadalajara.... with o internet, so I'm gonna go ahead and post chapter 2 already, I promise the first chance I get I'll post chap 3, anywho thank you for the reviews and I don't blame most of you for thinking I wasn't coming back. -_-' anywho as some of you pointed out there is no big difference in this one, just itty bitty stuff. Blah blah, let's get to it ne?  
  
~~ My Hana ~~  
  
It seemed like an eternity before they finally made it to the thermal waters. It was completely dark now and Shippou hand fallen asleep on Inu- Yasha's shoulder. They decided to let the little kitsune sleep for the night as everyone else left behind their equipment at a reasonably good campsite getting ready to bathe.  
  
The warm lake, was divided by boulders in three sections, the girls obviously took the furthest from the campsite.  
  
"Don't wait up for us if we take too long ne?" Kagome winked at the boys  
  
"And don't go wandering around 'inspecting the grounds'..." warned Sango eyeing Miroku.  
  
He was however removing the knot from his violet cloth seemingly elsewhere. His eyes were gazing at nothing in particular as he loosened his robes. This without a doubt left Sango with a look of surprise on her face. She actually couldn't help but tilt her head and stare at the Houshi for a while. It wasn't until he felt everyone's gaze on him that he snapped out of his small trance and looked up to Sango.  
  
"What is it?" he asked calmly  
  
Sango eyed him cautiously "Nandemonai...." she said heading off the springs along with a smiling Kagome.  
  
The girls calmly entered the small pool of water letting its warm temperature relax the tired muscles of their bodies. They relaxed for a few minutes before proceeding to wash off their filthy clothes. Once finished they found two comfortable rocks to sit on and just sat in silence for a while before Sango began a casual conversation.  
  
"Houshi-sama was acting odd ne?"  
  
Kagome turned to her friend "Hai."  
  
"He seemed distracted... Why do you suppose?"  
  
She hid a smile "I haven't the slightest idea."  
  
A drowsy silence invaded the pond before Kagome had to ask.  
  
"So Sango. You've known Shinosuke for year's ne?"  
  
"Aa."  
  
"And so." she didn't know how to ask the next question without seeming nosy.  
  
"He was my first love."  
  
She looked a little surprised at her friend to find her smiling softly gazing up at the starry night sky. Well that was easier than she thought.  
  
"Hontou ne?" Kagome asked ready for the details  
  
"I met Shinosuke when I was five, and I hated him." She began  
  
~~  
  
"Ah!" she yelled crashing into the sand. Above her stood a boy brushing his nose looking down mockingly at her.  
  
"Too bad shorty, better luck next time." He chuckled  
  
Red in the face she recovered quickly and pushed her face against his, having to look up of course. "I will kill you one day!"  
  
"No you won't." he smiled  
  
"I will so! I swear one day I'll cut you up with your own weapon!"  
  
"Nop..."  
  
"Yes I will!"  
  
"No you won't."  
  
"Will to!"  
  
"Sango!"  
  
An adult's voice interrupted their little debate. Recognizing her father Sango picked up her new but heavy weapon and ran up the hill to the village. Not before turning back and sourly sticking her tongue out at the show off.  
  
~  
  
"What is it?" she said staring at the weird animal.  
  
Her aunt chuckled and uncovered the tiny thing in her arms. "He's not an animal Sango-chan..." she raised an eye brow "This is your baby brother. Kohaku."  
  
"Kohaku..." she whispered leaning over to see it better. "Why doesn't it open his eyes?"  
  
"He's sleeping. Would you like to hold him?"  
  
Before Sango could object the small warm lump was being placed into her arms. She stared at it for the longest time before her father came out from the room behind them.  
  
"Miyo." She signaled for her aunt  
  
She got up and both talked about something very serious Sango couldn't hear. Instead she headed to where her father had just come from, to find her mother still laying down over the futon. It wasn't like her to stay in bed for so long.  
  
"Hana..." her mother called seeing her daughter. "Come." She smiled warmly.  
  
Always loving it when her mother hugged her she crouched against the bed letting her mothers arms come around her. She couldn't hug her back at the moment as she was busy with her little brother.  
  
"My two treasures..." her mother whispered into her hair.  
  
She was hot, and hugging them very tight. Letting them go at last, Sango looked to her mother's face. Her stomach jumped when she saw tears running into her hair. She didn't know why her mother was crying, but she knew it was because of something bad.  
  
"Okaa-san..."  
  
Putting on a smile, her mother stroked very gently the worried little face of her daughter.  
  
"You are too young to have such expressions Hana... cheer up, everything will be fine."  
  
Not too convinced she looked at the woman on the futon. Red in the face but with cold hands. Something was wrong, something didn't feel right, and it scared her.  
  
"You're all right... ne kaa-san?" she asked  
  
Her mother gave her another one of those heart breaking smiles and stroked her hair.  
  
"Kohaku will need you Hana; you have to take good care of him and your father. Remember I will always be looking to you."  
  
"Okaa-san...?" Sango asked getting scared. Her mother took her into her chest and hugged her uncomfortably tight taking in a deep breath.  
  
"Do not wilt before your time my little flower..."  
  
~~  
  
If Sango would known she would never hug her mother again, she would have tried to take in everything she was with that hug. When her father called for her she didn't know her mother would never look her way again, despite what she said. She would never kiss her gently on the cheek, or take her hand in the village. Never again encourage her with Hiraikotsu, never hug her the way only she could and hear the soft thump against her chest, never finish teaching her about the plants and animals or come to this place, their field, to collect flowers for tou-san. Never to laugh or sigh or smile or cry. Never again.  
  
"Hey shorty, didn't show up for your daily defeat. What's the matter finally gave up?"  
  
She didn't realize there was somebody here, that he had said anything offensive, or that she had been collecting many flowers that were now in her lap. And she realized tears were streaming down her cheeks only when she saw his expression.  
  
Giving a small gasp the boy she hated rushed over to her bombarding her with questions she couldn't hear.  
  
"What's wrong?! Are you all right? Are you hurt? Do you need help? Who did this?"  
  
Looking down to the flowers in her lap she took the biggest one gently with both hands. "Kaa-san loved flowers... I was hers." She said thinking it was important that he know this.  
  
~~~  
  
"He looked at me with sad eyes I guess debating on what to do." Continued Sango back from her own past  
  
"All he did was sit silently beside me. I was just about to ask him to leave when he took me by surprise, doing something a boy had never done to me. He hugged me. I went stiff but he didn't let go, actually, he pulled me into his lap. I was shocked at first and blushing like mad. And then he said that." Sango smiled bitterly.  
  
"If he had just kept quiet I would have been able to knock him silly and complain about his weird attitude. But he beat me too it." She smiled at her friend  
  
Kagome looked up to Sango cautiously "What did he say?"  
  
Sango looked down at the ripples her body created in the water before continuing "I bet she still loves you. No one could not love you, or forget you."  
  
Kagome gave small gasp taking her hands to her chest "He said that to you?" she asked unable to hold in her smile  
  
Sango nodded sheepishly "Not great with his grammar but, at that moment I forgot I was supposed to hate him. After the shock of what he had said and done wore off I decided it wasn't that bad being where I was, or being cared for by kid I wanted to kill a few days back. So I let out what I had to, all over poor Shino. The sun set and Tou-san called me back home. I ran off without saying anything."  
  
Kagome listened intently with a few tears building in her eyes; God knows she was the most sentimental person in Japan.  
  
"We never mentioned that day afterwards. The next day he came to my house, and gave me a white flower from the field. And he said." Sango paused, as a nostalgic smile crept onto her face " 'Here Jou-chan. to make your life more pretty.'" she chuckled "Then he ran off like the coward he was, and I was left redder than a ripe tomato in complete shock. It was the first time he called me Jou-chan, and the first time he was 'nice' to me. After that day I guess you could say I crossed 'the thin line'. But I actually didn't figure it out until a couple years later. I never told him of course, but I was pretty obvious. And as we grew up, so did our relationship, he still taunted me and what not, but father's training gave good results. The day I beat him was the best day of my life, I still remember his expression when my katana came down to his throat." She smiled  
  
"I was starting to think he would be the man I would marry someday. That's when I realized I loved him. When I was fifteen I had made up my mind to tell him, I would tell him and hope he said it back. I was almost certain he loved me too." she paused to swallow the lump in her throat "I could have almost sworn..."  
  
Kagome looked at her friend and at the forced smile on her lips before she continued.  
  
"On the way to his house I met up with him in the street, I asked if he had a second and he nodded. I had everything all planned out. I would take him to the field behind the fort and give him back the white flower I owed him from nine years back, and then I would confess. On our way we spoke of many things, mostly memories. Finally out of the fort I asked him to sit beside me. With my hands behind my back I plucked out a flower secretly, and took a big breath ready for whatever came out. It was then that he looked up to me and spoke before anything happened... He told me about Yumi."  
  
"Yumi?" asked Kagome  
  
"The girl he was going to marry." finished Sango.  
  
Kagome made a small noise at the back of her throat at her friend's words.  
  
"He told me he thought he was falling in love with her. He described his feelings for her and was scared of what might happen. We had both met Yumi about two months back, when Kenji-san found her injured in the woods. When the elders in the village discovered she was an orphan they decided to take her in with her consent. She gladly agreed. Tou-san told me to take care of her and befriend her as we were not a normal village. I went to see her almost everyday taking care of her wounds. And Shinosuke would come along some times... but I never imagined he..." she gave a small sigh before continuing  
  
"So I stood there with my heart in a million pieces listening to how he would propose to her. Smiling through the pain and congratulating him. He smiled down at me one last time and gave me a hug. I still don't really know why, he just held me in his arms for a while, and pulled away when I didn't hug him back. If I had held him the way I wanted to, I would have probably started to cry, so I didn't." she shrugged  
  
"I did nothing, but give him a fake smile and wish him luck. So I watched the love of my life for ten years leave the field where it all started, when he was out of sight I took the flower I had cut for him and crushed it in my fist.... The worst thing about it was. I really liked Yumi, she was always so kind to me, and I couldn't hate her for taking him from me. She really did deserve him more than I did. She wasn't an exterminator, but a kind, feminine girl... Everyone in the village found out of course. Everyone knew how I felt about him. Except him, they all talked about how cruel he was, but I never blamed him. Because I never told him. I let them get married and wished him a happy life."  
  
"I'm so sorry Sango." said Kagome not knowing what else to say. As her friend finished her story  
  
Sango shook her head "It's in the past."  
  
Kagome tilted her head looking at the sad eyes of her friend "Is it really...?"  
  
~~~  
  
Miroku sat crossed armed in the warm waters of the pond just staring at the ripples. What the hell was wrong with him? Shinosuke's appearance wasn't anything special, why was he getting so worked up over nothing. He was a very calm and cool person; never over reacting or doing anything irrational. So why couldn't he push this horrible feeling aside? He was acting oddly and he knew it, so he had to stop it before people started saying things.  
  
"What the hell is wrong with you?" Inu-Yasha's voice interrupted  
  
Miroku's eye brow twitched, so much for the shake-it-off-before-anyone-says- anything plan.  
  
"You've been acting weird all afternoon, it's getting annoying."  
  
"Thank you for your preoccupation Inu-Yasha but I'm fine..."  
  
Inu-Yasha humped before his lips curled up into a sneer "You're jealous aren't ya?"  
  
Again Miroku's brow twitched involuntarily "Among other things...yes."  
  
Anything Inu-Yasha was expecting wasn't close to this. He uncrossed his arms and stared at the monk with wide eyes "You are??"  
  
Miroku let out a deep sigh not bothering to answer the hanyou, if those dog ears were good for something, it was hearing. He didn't know why Inu-Yasha was so surprised. It wasn't as if everyone was a stubborn ass who wouldn't admit or voice his feelings no matter how much they gushed out. He was honest and accepted the truth, unlike others. He was just about to voice out this very thought when movement from the bushes attracted both their attention. Both men looked up at Shinosuke as he entered the water.  
  
Miroku's eyes widened and he tried not to stare too much, but Inu-Yasha being his usual blunt self just spat it out.  
  
"What the hell is that on your back?"  
  
Miroku sighed with a mix of frustration and embarrassment. 'That', seemed to be a shapeless black scar about as big as his hand on Shinosuke's lower back. Now Miroku was an honest man but he was also taught when to be prudent.  
  
"Inu-Yasha." Warned Miroku, not the first or last time Inu-Yasha would say something dumb  
  
Shinosuke smiled "Don't worry about it; I know having a youkai planted on your back isn't exactly normal. Both men tensed up at his words. "Oh don't worry, I'm in perfect control of myself, this isn't the kind that seeks domination over a body."  
  
"A youkai?" asked Miroku glancing down at his back again  
  
"What kind is it then?" asked Inu-Yasha a bit uneasily  
  
"It's a parasite" said Shinosuke settling into the water calmly "It finds a host to feed off, does so until they die, and then looks for another one."  
  
"You're the host?" asked Inu-Yasha  
  
Shinosuke nodded giving a half hearted smile.  
  
"But then you..."  
  
"According to the size of this thing I probably don't have more than a week left."  
  
"What?" called out Miroku immediately thinking of Sango's reaction to this.  
  
The monk who had been listening intently now turned serious and looked over at Shinosuke.  
  
"Why haven't you had an exorcism?" asked Miroku.  
  
Shinosuke started rubbing his arms and shoulders clean from the goo. "Once this demon is inside of you, it becomes a part of you, so much that if it's pulled out you die. The only way it can be removed is if the parasite leaves voluntarily, but to do so it needs another healthy host, and not many exorcists are willing to make that sacrifice. I've been told you can expel it yourself it, but you need special training for that. That's one of the reasons I've been traveling, trying to find someone who knows how to get rid of it, or at least anyone willing to teach me. Apparently though, it's a very ancient technique, no one seems to know how to do it anymore. So I pretty much have accepted my destiny, after all it's not as if I had a reason to stay."  
  
The men looked solemnly at the man sitting in front of them. Miroku, understood him in a very realistic way, but this man knew he had less than a week to live, Miroku couldn't tell you with certainty, and as Moushin used to say, ignorance was bliss.  
  
"Why do you say you have nothing to live for? Sango cares for you." Miroku said to his own displeasure  
  
"I didn't know she was still a part of my life. Still in my condition there isn't much I can do anymore... so I plan to leave before anything happens, that way she will leave me saying, see you next time, instead of a final goodbye. She will think I simply continued my journey. I don't think it's necessary to put her through that kind of pain. She has lost too many loved ones already."  
  
"You're not going to tell her?" asked Miroku  
  
"No." he said seriously "And I would appreciate it if you two also kept this to yourselves. Please."  
  
Nobody said anything for a while until the girls appeared behind a boulder.  
  
"You guys still aren't finished? Geez and you say girls take forever." Said Kagome taking her things back to camp. Sango gave them all a pleasant smile before following her. After Kagome disappeared behind a line of trees Inu- Yasha turned back to find both men staring at Sango. With his usual bored face, he raised an eyebrow. Well at least Shinosuke didn't have it for Kagome; Miroku would have to worry about this one.  
  
"They're right. I'm done already, and I have no interest in becoming a 'Human raisin' as Kagome says." Said Inu-Yasha getting out of the warm lake.  
  
Miroku raised an eyebrow. "Inu-Yasha." he warned. The mentioned stopped in his tracks and turned.  
  
"Don't shake."  
  
The Hanyou scowled and left for his towel with his normal 'Feh!' Shinosuke smiled at Inu-Yasha then turned to Miroku.  
  
"I will leave peacefully knowing that Jou-chan is well taken care of and well loved. I know you will not let anything happen to her."  
  
"She is a strong woman." Answered the monk  
  
"Yes, but she is still just a woman..."  
  
Miroku looked at the man before him, choosing not to say anything. Shinosuke was wrong, she was so much more than just a woman... she was his woman. Common sense kicked in seconds after his small daydream. His woman? His brows furrowed, he was beginning to sound like Kouga now...  
  
~~*~~  
  
There was more to this chapter but I kinda had to cut it off cuz it would have been ridiculously too long. Anywho I'll be back when I can and, for the people who didn't already know Hana is flower in jap... I noticed by the spell check I use a lot of jap, maybe I should put up a translation sheet... it's been requested before...  
  
What do you think minna? Let me know in your review! Ohohoho!  
  
¬¬' *cough cough* 


	4. Midnight Wanderer

I found a place to post it and finally had time!... and well that's about it, thank you for your reviews minna!  
  
~~Midnight Wanderer~~  
  
Sleeping would not be part of her night; she had way too many things on her mind for her to do something as productive-less as sleep. What on earth had Kagome meant by that question of hers? Of course it was in the past. The guy had broken her heart, although she never had any ill feelings towards him or Yumi. But, she had forgotten about him, she had long since accepted that he was no longer a part of her life anymore. Of course she would never forget him, but that's all he would be: a memory, just like everyone else at the village.  
  
As far as she was concerned her life was divided in two now, that bastard Naraku being the line of separation. Her life at the village had been wonderful and she would never forget it, but now it was simply a different time, a time of change and new experiences. And along with the new pain and suffering, there also came new friends, joy and emotions. She paused for a second thinking about this last thought for a while. New emotions. Her eyes swiveled left to the base of a tree where he had fallen asleep. He wasn't there.  
  
A small sigh escaped from her chest. She was used to it by now. The first time she had woken up to find his space empty she had freaked out and run into the forest looking for him like crazy, which lead to a very embarrassing moment when she finally crashed into him searching frantically in the dark. He had asked if she was ok first and then what she was doing running around the woods after midnight. After that there was stuttering, blushing, groping and smacking. The usual.  
  
She gave another sigh shaking her head. But as she said that had only been the first time, his midnight wanderings in the woods didn't come as a surprise to her anymore, although she still wondered why he did it so much. Of course she would never ask him. After all it wasn't as if it were her business and what would he think if he knew that she knew he often did this? After all she was supposed to be sleeping.  
  
She looked up to the night sky and let her eyes wander from one shining star to another, sometimes if she looked close enough she could see shapes. She couldn't help it. If feelings could be controlled the world would be a different place. Of course that baka sukebe meant something to her. And she knew all to well. Truth be told it really freaked her out when she accepted it. After all heartbreak was not something she could forget, and if it happened once with a boy who was very kind and thoughtful, what in the world would happen with this lecherous woman hunter?  
  
There had actually been a time when she tried with all her might to forget about him. She snapped at him, she ignored him, and she mentioned all his defects at every moment of the day to herself, as a bitter reminder. The most convincing thing was the fact that he didn't have any other feelings for her than simple friendship. That almost worked. Actually to this day it was the fist that kept her down whenever she got too excited over something small.  
  
Her feelings for Miroku really were silly, and at times she wondered if they were even genuine. The facts were; Inu-Yasha and Kagome, even if they were a hopeless case, were always together in their little group. There was Kirara and Shippou, but being realistic Miroku was the only one she could have a half decent conversation with. They were, a sort of 'default' pairing in the small group. Second, no one on this planet could deny the fact that the monk had very nice looks. He was attractive, she accepted it. And she was forced to see him every day. She was after all a growing woman. And he unfortunately... was of the opposite sex. Could these feelings be helped? Well... It was better than falling for Inu-Yasha.  
  
She chuckled to herself shaking her head. No offense to the hanyou. But hell no! White hair, fangs and claws may work for Kagome, but they weren't exactly a turn on for her. That beast should be grateful for having someone like Kagome by his side. He was a picky ingrate. She lifted her eyebrows. Not her business if her best friend's hanyou was attracted to a block of well shaped clay that looked almost like Kagome herself.  
  
But getting back to her own case, it wasn't as if she were some hormone altered freak with feelings for every man she met, she was simply an adolescent. At least that's what Kagome had told her. And maybe she was right; she didn't go after every male specimen she saw. Unlike, other people she knew.  
  
Her brows furrowed. Baka houshi. She really chose the absolute worst man to fall in love with. But it wasn't as if there were many choices. A rustling close by alerted her senses. She turned her eyes a bit to see a familiar silhouette come forth from the trees. The rings of his Shakujo were mainly what gave him away. He looked over the campsite before heading over to the place where he was supposed to be sleeping. Sango listened, more than watched, as the monk set himself comfortably against the trunk of the giant tree and finally gave a calm sigh. She didn't actually know if he was going to sleep, you could never know with this guy to be honest. But she had to admit she was always more relaxed when he was somewhere near her. Where she could see him at least.  
  
Her eyes shifted a bit to her left and fell upon another man she cared for. She didn't know what was bothering her so much. When she had first seen him of course everything had been wonderful, but as the night passed she couldn't help but feel something eerie in her stomach. Apparently nothing was wrong, but her gut instinct, as Kagome would call it, was telling her there was something about this whole situation that didn't fit in.  
  
Getting to think about it she thought it was rather silly, and she knew she wasn't one to be trusting. She never had been, and since the incident with Naraku and his trap, even less. It was probably just an overreaction. She had also become a bit more pessimist, explaining to herself that it was just her imagination thinking that nothing good could happen anymore without it being accompanied by something horrible.  
  
This was also absurd, but then why couldn't she shake this feeling off. The worst part about it was, precisely that she didn't know what it was. Maybe this wasn't really happening, maybe there was something wrong with him, or maybe it was a trap. There was however, nothing about this situation that indicated anything of the sort. It was frustrating. Even if she did since an odd atmosphere in the evening, supposed it was just the group not used to a stranger. She wasn't the only paranoid one.  
  
The thing she was afraid of, was finally giving in to her need for her best friend, let down her walls and push aside her instinct, finally trust him, and then have her happiness ripped apart for the hundredth time. There was a limit to every person ne? And she could only take so much. But what could she do about it? How could she know? Just, being by his side and not letting her guard down right? That would work, she would give him half her trust, if something happened, it wouldn't hurt as badly. She just had to be careful not to give in completely.  
  
A soft whisper in a familiar voice made her jump  
  
"You'll be tired in the morning if you don't get some sleep."  
  
She sat up turning to the voice trying to lower the rhythm of her heart. She looked at him smiling skeptically.  
  
"So says the midnight Rurouni." She answered  
  
He smirked "Midnight rurouni ne? I didn't know anyone knew about my little excursions."  
  
Sango smiled "I'm a light sleeper... and your Shakujo always wakes me up."  
  
"Gomen... you should have told me it bothered you."  
  
"It doesn't."  
  
There was an uncertain silence between the two and Sango wondered if she should keep up the small conversation, or just say goodnight and try to go to sleep.  
  
"Daijoubu?" he asked  
  
She turned to him confused "Nani?"  
  
"You seemed troubled... are you?"  
  
She wanted to ask him how the heck he knew, but then she would give herself away. Besides he was one to speak... if anyone was acting odd it was him. While these thoughts were running through her head, her mouth compensated by stuttering.  
  
Miroku smiled "It seems you are the one who needs a midnight wandering."  
  
"If you're gonna be muttering go far, some of us were sleeping and are still trying to..." murmured a grouchy voice from a tree.  
  
"Gomen nasai Inu-Yasha." Smiled Sango  
  
"Ikou..." suggested Miroku  
  
~~  
  
It definitely didn't take much to convince her to go walking in the middle of the night with him. She had warned him, but frankly didn't know how much good it would do. Meanwhile he had done all the talking since they left the campsite speaking the obvious of course.  
  
"You are like all of us Sango..."  
  
She was now walking by his side, looking from the leaf covered forest floor, to the tall walls of trees and the night's starry sky. It really was pleasant out here, and she always thought his voice had a comforting tone to it, very tranquil.  
  
"Why do you say that Houshi-sama?"  
  
"Because all of us are afraid of happiness. In the past if something pleasant happened to us we would give in to the moment. But nobody in our little freak show is trusting of those feelings anymore."  
  
"Freak show?" Sango interrupted  
  
"It's been a while since any of us has received happiness with no strings attached. We're just not used to it anymore, for we've learned there will almost always be silence before the storm. You get burned once and you never go near fire again, that's how you feel towards Shinosuke-san... it's just a bit of fear that's all..."  
  
Sango looked ahead of her, hearing the rings of Miroku's staff clank against one another. She knew this, but was surprised at how well he could read her. He had always been a perceptive person but it was even a bit creepy how well he interoperated things, mostly it made her jealous because she wanted to know him like he did her. It was difficult though.  
  
"And yes, I think Freak show defines a short tempered hanyou, an odd girl from the future, a young orphan kitsune, a handsome cool monk with a vacuum in his hand and a very well formed demon huntress, quite well."  
  
A vein popped up involuntarily on Sango's forehead as she raised an eyebrow.  
  
"Well formed?" she asked. That was the first adjective he came up with when he thought of her?! Well formed??  
  
"It's a compliment Sango!" He defended, then smiled down slyly at her "I have knowledge on the topic."  
  
She went stiff. She couldn't possibly be any angrier at him than right now... well what could she have expected? This was just like her. She got too confident before time.  
  
"Remove your hand if you wish to keep it..." she said coldly  
  
He smiled innocently at her. Two seconds before his face was slammed into the soil. Sango stomped back to camp murmuring something about a waste of time. Why did it have to be him?!  
  
~~  
  
Miroku had come back to camp soon after his little encounter with decaying leaves to see if he should apologize to Sango or just leave things as always. He was acting as normally as he could what with disturbing thoughts running through his head and all. This had already happened once before. But when it did, he knew Sango wasn't going to abandon their mission just yet for the prince. It was a sort of egotistical knowledge. But for the split second he thought she would actually stay with him, he had made a promise to himself not to interfere.  
  
He reached the small clearing where everyone was sleeping only to find her place empty. He wondered if she was all right, and asked himself if he should go looking for her. It was after all his fault she was rampaging furious around the woods. In the end however he decided against it. If something were wrong he would sense it. So instead he simply took his place against the giant oak and waited for her to return. If she took too long though, he would go after her.  
  
Remembering his inner conflict from earlier on he gave a silent sigh. Sango deserved much more than what he was. She deserved more than to travel from town to town looking for a very dangerous monster that had already caused her so much pain. If she had what she deserved she would be living in a castle with everything at her feet and the man she loved by her side. Nothing less than that. And what could he offer her? It was ridiculous to compare. That's why he thought it was best if he didn't interfere and maybe even help her to find someone who was really worthwhile.  
  
That was the reason behind the groping, and the flirting and the walls. It would be better to push her away, it would be better if she saw what kind of a jerk he was. She needed to know he wasn't good enough for her. Still in everyone's heart there was always a beam of hope. And though insignificant and trivial as it was, he had it as well. A tiny voice that said to him maybe if all his circumstances changed, he could be with her. Even so, at this moment that was completely out of the question, or so he tried to believe.  
  
Shinosuke's arrival had screwed up everything. He thought if he could just hang in the way he was, time might change things. But now Sango had the possibility to go with someone else she cared for, and this option was much more feasible than the prince at the castle. It was too real. Of course after a while of thinking he decided it was actually best if she went with Shinosuke. It was after all, what he 'wanted' for her... or at least that's what he told himself.  
  
He looked up into the dark woods. She was back, hopefully a bit calmer. He shut his eyes not really sure of what he would say to her if she found him awake. She stepped quietly into the camp and Miroku couldn't help but steal a peek. She looked around to everyone then to him. With an unreadable expression she stood staring at him for the longest time. He was beginning to get uncomfortable when she looked down at the floor sheepishly and lay back down beside Kirara. It took her a while to get to sleep but eventually her breathing evened out and her muscles relaxed.  
  
He couldn't help the small smile that came over his lips. Watching her fall asleep was one of the things he most enjoyed from their epical journey. His smile turned bitter. It was pathetic really, if it were happening to someone else, it would almost be funny.  
  
~~  
  
Mourning came too soon and she didn't even remember falling asleep. Inu- Yasha was up already as well as Miroku, she wondered if he had slept at all. 'Baka Houshi...' she thought lifting herself up from the floor. Yesterday's hot bath did wonders for her tired muscles but she was still tired. Sango cursed herself for wandering off that late at night. Even so it took a short while for her to get up and ready. Kagome appeared with Shippou wrapped in a towel too big for him. She had probably gone to bathe him given that last night he was too tired to join them. Had she been the last one up? Impossible.  
  
"Jou-chan? Can I talk to you for a second?"  
  
Sango looked up at Shinosuke still a bit groggy. Nodding, she followed him a bit into the forest  
  
"What is it Shino?" she asked still trying to rub the sleep out of her eyes.  
  
He seemed uncertain as to how to start this; she noticed this and perked up.  
  
"Listen Jou-chan..." he started once out of hearing range, or so he thought "I'm still very grateful for last night and I want you to know that it gave me great joy to see you again."  
  
Sango's eyes widened. He wanted to leave. And soon. She couldn't let him do that this quickly. At least for a few more days or maybe even... She got a crazy idea that she would probably regret later. Right now however she didn't think too much of it. He took a deep sigh seeing she wasn't saying anything and decided to continue.  
  
Sango interrupted still searching for the right words. "I was glad to see you too Shinosuke... and actually I was... I want to ask you a question." She said quickly  
  
Not expecting this from her he simply shrugged "Very well."  
  
"Would you like to come with us to find Naraku?"  
  
Shinosuke stared at the girl before him and didn't know what to say, he had pulled her away to say goodbye, not to---  
  
"You are a very skilled warrior Shinosuke; and the more we are the higher possibility we have of defeating that terrible monster, besides I would... I would really like your company. You don't know how much I've missed you and, now to see you here, alive and well... it just wouldn't be easy letting you go again..."  
  
She had said too much. She knew it, and he knew it, he was a bit surprised at how perceptive she was actually. It had probably been about eight months since he last saw her and in such short time she had been forced to grow up so quickly. The monk was right; she was a very strong woman. So much that he would be a burden to her now.  
  
"I don't know Jou-chan I... I'm not as strong as I used to be... I would only hold you back and---" he said sadly  
  
"Shino I know you and you would definitely not hold me back. Even if you were out of practice I don't want you to come along just because you're strong, I want you to come because you're my friend and I... I miss you more than you know..." she blushed looking up at his sad face almost begging him  
  
He looked down at her uncertainly "But what about your friends? How do you know they want me along?"  
  
"You don't have to worry about them, Kagome loves company so she won't say anything, Shippou will be on her side too... and all Inu-Yasha would care about is you not getting into trouble."  
  
"What about the Houshi?"  
  
Sango made a small sound of surprise trying to figure out just what he had meant by that. Still her mouth was quicker than her mind "What about him?"  
  
Shinosuke looked down at his uncertain friend and decided it was best if he didn't say what he was thinking. Still he had a decision to make. He was horrible at saying no and with that sad face she had now... to make matters worse, he didn't actually want to leave her either. He had a lot to talk about with her. There were a lot of things to be set strait. He looked down already regretting his decision, knowing that later on he would hate himself. But his heart and his head were two opposites. They never did get along and the wrong one always seemed to win.  
  
"Jou-chan... listen I... I have, things to tell you. I'll accompany you to the next village... it's a days way, but there we will part. I'm sorry, but I'd really be more of a burden than you know. You have a new life now and I... well I would be an extra piece." he saw how she was about to protest and set two fingers over her determined lips before he continued "If you like I can explain it at the village, but for now I think it's best if we just get moving."  
  
Sango knew there was no point in arguing about it now. After all she had convinced him to stay with them for a day, that would be enough time to try again to convince him to stay longer. She wasn't really sure if including him in their little group was the smartest thing to have done, but that would be taken care of later. Knowing that if Inu- Yasha got impatient he would be in a bad mood all day, she looked up to him and gave a small smile.  
  
Everyone in the group ran over each other when Sango and Shinosuke turned back to camp scrambling to get back before they noticed they were eavesdropping. But of course, everybody was specialized at that. So pretending to pick up supplies they all looked up when Sango and Shinosuke came back to the clearing. Everyone watched as Sango stepped determinedly up to Inu-Yasha. He looked down at her serious face, looking somewhat panicked.  
  
"Inu-Yasha. Shinosuke is going to accompany us to the next town." She started "and maybe afterwards, he'll join the group and come with us to destroy Naraku."  
  
Inu-Yasha raised an eye brow, but Sango looked up daring him to disagree. He looked towards Shinosuke who just shrugged lightly. One last look at Sango told him to not even try. He turned indignantly crossing his arms  
  
"Do what you want. He just better not slow us down."  
  
A smile of triumph came to the Taiji-ya's face, while Shinosuke sighed heavily. A small bead of sweat came down over Inu-Yasha's face once he was sure no one could see him. It was definite... women were scary.  
  
~~*°*~~  
  
I felt this last part could have been better but if I pick at something too much I get something I didn't really want and... well ah! Hem hem.... sorry I took so long. But since our semesters have become 4 months long the teachers are flying through the classes proudly leaving us a lot to do, plus the tutor mentor thingy... bleh! What do you think is better Evolution or Ornithology? -_-' mmmmm I hate second semester.....  
  
BTW about the jap translation sheet, I was gonna put it at the end of this chapter but it's kinda..... really long, so if anyone is interested in 6 pages of words in Japanese English AND Spanish, you can leave your e-mail in your review and I'll gladly send it to ya. 


	5. Carry On Dancing

I'm starting to think I should try to upload more than one chapter at a time sine I'm taking longer than I hoped in getting internet access. Hmmmm what do you think?  
  
Carry On Dancing   
  
The morning went by relatively silent; it was somewhat of an awkward situation. Sango too busy thinking, Shinosuke with that guilty look on his face and Miroku; Kagome's eyes had slipped over to him when Sango and Shinosuke had mentioned him in their conversation. Kagome had actually been shocked by her friend's response to such a question 'What about him?'! Sango was acting weird. And everybody noticed. Shippou, Inu-Yasha and herself had looked over cautiously at Miroku when she said this. To someone who didn't know him well, he had no apparent reaction, but Kagome had seen right through him. He was quick to hide it of course, but for that one second where the minimal movement of his brows gave away the surprise, she knew she had hurt him. Sango may as well just run up and stabbed him with his own Shakujo. Kagome knew all too well what that felt like to be left aside, pushed out of the way for someone else. She wasn't sure what her friend was doing, and didn't even know if Sango herself knew.  
  
Miroku had not shown a single sign of how deeply he had been hurt in the morning and it amazed Kagome how well he could pull in his feelings. He hadn't said a single thing all morning but wasn't being closed or acting depressed. He simply didn't need to talk. It bothered him the way Kagome kept staring at him with those eyes. The whole point of this ridiculous act was because he didn't want anybody's sympathy. Much like Inu-Yasha, there was nothing that angered him more than pity. Still it seemed Kagome could cut open his skin and see into his soul.  
  
Shinosuke for one kept looking at Sango from time to time with a worried expression. Shippou from Kagome's shoulder kept staring at everyone in the group well aware that something important was happening, but he was a prudent child and said nothing. He was simply analyzing the situation like Kagome. Inu-Yasha on the other hand did not know the meaning of prudence.  
  
"Ya know this is even more awkward because everyone is so damn quiet." Pointed out Inu-Yasha quite suddenly.  
  
Sango, Shinosuke and Miroku turned to look at him as if something were seriously wrong with him, Kagome couldn't agree more.  
  
"Inu-Yasha... Osuwari!" she looked down angrily at the human shaped crater "Would you really prefer it if I talked?" she asked sweetly  
  
"I-ya..." he groaned with dirt in his mouth  
  
Miroku glared at the knocked out hanyou. How could one be so immature? Of course there was a bit of truth in what he said.  
  
Inu-Yasha's ears twitched as three members of the group looked west. Kagome and Shippou looked around at the serious faces of their comrades and followed their line of sight. Inu-Yasha pulled himself out of the road and took his hand to the hilt of his sword.  
  
"Kagome. Do you sense shards?" he asked her  
  
Kagome looked at the Hanyou then back west "Iie..."  
  
"They're probably after the ones we have. But it's not just one Inu- Yasha, there are about a dozen." Warned Miroku seeing him pull out Tetsusaiga  
  
"I can smell them. Rodents."  
  
"Rodents?" squeaked Kagome "like... mice things?"  
  
"Ready" "Ready" said Shinosuke and Sango in unison.  
  
"Shinosuke-san has an exterminator outfit too." Noticed Shippou.  
  
Kagome turned to look at the couple. It was true; Shinosuke's outfit like Kohaku's only differed in the color deep blue. They actually looked very cute together. Shinosuke held his Niken expertly in one hand and Sango's Hiraikotsu was already poised and ready.  
  
Miroku didn't have time to admire them much as suddenly from out of the forest bushes came the pack. There were a bit more than twelve. Something like overgrown shrews jumped out rapidly heading towards the group. Inu-Yasha took a protective stand in front of Kagome and Shippou. The first youkai that reached the group encountered Shinosuke's Niken. With a strong uppercut nothing pleasant was left of the beast.  
  
"Hiraikotsu!"  
  
The giant boomerang made an amazing maneuver about six inches away from the floor taking out the beasts that didn't have enough time to react. The ones that did manage to jump out of the way were quickly met by one of the two giant blades of the Niken. Miroku ripped whatever animal came near him with his Shakujo watching the couple battle out of the corner of his eye. The rodents weren't any trouble for Inu-Yasha either.  
  
The number of monsters had gone down drastically and the few that were left were focused their attention on 'the strongest element'; Sango and Shinosuke. They met back to back.  
  
"You still remember Jou-chan?" he smiled  
  
"Do you think I could forget?" she answered unsheathing her katana.  
  
Inu-Yasha looked at the couple curiously, sheathing Tetsusaiga. "They won't be needing help." He said to Miroku and turned back to watch intently.  
  
Miroku looked two seconds at the hanyou before returning his gaze to the couple, just before it started.  
  
Kagome gave a yelp of admiration when she saw it. Both took a step forward when the youkai's charged simultaneously. They proceeded with a horizontal slash at the beasts taking out four, followed by a sharp uppercut destroying two and a vertical slash turning ninety degrees to another opponent giving a hard diagonal slash downwards. Only one youkai left, but ready to escape a hard air kick and one pierce by both their weapons stopped every sound and movement.  
  
Kagome and Shippou stood open mouthed staring at the couple. Much like Miroku only without the intense feeling of jealousy and abandonment. Inu-Yasha looked at them with a certain admiration and simply smiled as both pulled out their weapons from the beast and shook the blood off, still synchronized.  
  
"Sugoi!!" called Kagome clapping enthusiastically from behind the smiling Inu-Yasha. She was fascinated by her friend's amazing movements, or maybe it was just the fact that Shinosuke followed her every move with a rhythm so keen it was... fascinating.  
  
Shinosuke and Sango looked to each other and couldn't help but chuckle at their achieved dance. It had been a while after all since they had done this. But it was obviously things like this could never be forgotten.  
  
"So it doesn't end with the double stab?" asked Inu-Yasha eagerly  
  
"Oh yes, that's supposed to be the final move always." Explained Shinosuke "See this dance was created for numerous enemies, it has more than ten different attacks all in one. With the right combination you can go from three two almost fifty enemies."  
  
The mood as far as Kagome was concerned had defiantly lightened up since the rodent attack. It was after all a spectacular display of technique by her friend, and of course Inu-Yasha was interested. He was listening intently to every word Shinosuke was saying.  
  
"See it's all about measuring the enemies size in our case there were only 9 youkai's left, five to each of us, if there had been more the routine would have followed along ending with the same double stab. The idea is never to hesitate synchronizing with the partner in a flow of movements, this confuses the enemy. Actually you can also do this attack with more than another member, your parties can be of 2, 3, 6, but after 8 it gets harder because whoever is with you, you have to trust enough to pull it off. Plus keeping 2 people synchronized is a lot easier than keeping 8 or 10 in sync. " Continued Shinosuke  
  
Kagome and Sango smiled at the fascinated look on Inu-Yasha's face. He looked like a six year old listening to his teacher talk about the solar system.  
  
"So you always follow the same routine?" asked Inu-Yasha again  
  
"Basically yes, the normal thing would be, horizontal, uppercut, vertical down, turn x strike down, x strike up, fist pierce, turn elbow horizontal, air kick double, that's the one where you do it on your own with both your legs, the circle and finally the double stab. From then on you can either repeat this pattern or make up your own, actually you can incorporate other moves if you and your partner know them and if you read each other well enough for you both to pull it off at the same time. For as long as I can remember though Jou-chan always does the air kick before the final double stab. Only hers isn't a double kick considering we both do it and there's no need to use both legs, the opponent gets two blows either way."  
  
Inu-Yasha nodded his mouth gaping open a bit. "What are a circle and an x strike? Oh and the elbow horizontal?"  
  
Shinosuke continued to explain to the hanyou every new question he came up with, apparently both of them having a good time. Sango and Kagome turned to look at each other from time to time smiling at how simple men could be.  
  
Miroku, the forgotten one, had simply given Sango and Shinosuke a pleasant smile before Inu-Yasha, Shippou and Kagome started gushing out admiration after they had finished. He had always thought he and Sango made an excellent fighting duo, but after seeing this he couldn't help but feel useless by her side. The void in his stomach got bigger with each passing moment and it was getting harder and harder to keep that stupid smile on his face.  
  
"Houshi-sama?"  
  
He would recognize that voice in any circumstances. He looked up just in time to see Kirara jump at his chest. He caught the small youkai as it proceeded to take a comfortable place on his shoulder then looked up at Sango.  
  
"Nani?"  
  
"You've been awfully quiet all morning. Is something wrong?" she asked curiously.  
  
That face of hers wasn't helping his little façade the least bit.  
  
"Nothing is wrong; I'm listening to Inu-Yasha and Shinosuke-san's conversation."  
  
Well it was half true; they were being kind of loud. Sango however was far from convinced. He decided to go for the secure thing.  
  
"But it's nice to know someone worries for this humble monk." He smiled getting a blush out of her. "What may I do to get you to believe me?"  
  
His smile turned small and innocent along with Sango's widening eyes.  
  
Inu-Yasha and Shinosuke stopped their conversation and the loud crack of skin behind them and turned to see Sango, fuming; Kagome, somewhat exasperated; and Miroku with his cheek glowing pink. Inu-Yasha gave a bored sigh while Shinosuke stared in curiosity.  
  
"I believe you Houshi-sama..." said an angered Sango moving ahead.  
  
Miroku gave a weak smile rubbing his cheek. "I'm glad at least one of us does..." he whispered not noticing the sad look on Kagome's eyes as she looked back at him.  
  
Everyone was delighted to see the small lines of smoke against the red sky when they arrived at the village. The sun was already setting and after an exiting journey they deserved a nice rest. It had been a pleasant day for mostly everyone. Shinosuke and Inu-Yasha had really hit it off. Honestly Kagome had never seen men talk so much, especially Inu-Yasha... they were acting like school girls. All through lunch and the rest of the afternoon there had been friendly small talk. Even Miroku joined in once in a while but every time he did Kagome only gave him this long glance of uncertainty.  
  
But now close to the village everyone was seemingly relived to have arrived. Walking along the worn path Sango noticed a large shrine to her left, almost hidden by the tall trees surrounding it. It looked really old.  
  
"It's probably used to lock away unwanted spirits."  
  
Ah, he had spoken. Sango turned to her right where Miroku was also looking at the shrine.  
  
"It's a bit bigger than I'm used to seeing though." He finished  
  
"Maybe the town had many bad spirits." Suggested Shippou  
  
"It's probable, the town is a bit larger than most villages I've seen, and it has many things to see." Spoke Shinosuke.  
  
"Really? Like what?" asked Kagome  
  
"The silk that is made here is very famous, you can find almost anything in the market place in the centre of the village, there are also lots of stores where you can find charms and amulets, and repellents for youkai, and they have a spectacular temple here, a little further into the woods from this shrine and a wonderful collection of books and documents. They also say the exorcists here are some of the best there are, that's one of the reasons I came here a few days back."  
  
Shinosuke caught himself too late and looked worriedly at Sango who was indeed looking up at him curiously. Miroku and Inu-Yasha eyed him as well, Kagome looked from one face to another, something was definitely up...  
  
"Exorcist? We do you need an exorcist?" asked Sango  
  
Shinosuke fumbled around for words, Miroku decided it was for the best if he interfered.  
  
"I told you I would get rid of the demon Shinosuke... remember, you mentioned yesterday that one had taken over your Niken. It's a bit dangerous getting rid of it what with the double blades and all ne?"  
  
"A-no... hai, I must have forgotten to mention it to Sango... that's, why I had trouble getting rid of the other youkai yesterday..."  
  
Inu-Yasha lifted an eye brow at the improvised lie.  
  
"Oh," said Sango "I didn't notice. You fought fine this afternoon."  
  
Shinosuke tensed "It hasn't got total control yet... I just have to concentrate when I fight that's all, and today I had you beside me."  
  
Inu-Yasha and Miroku waited expectantly to see if Sango bought it, Shinosuke wasn't that bad at lying.  
  
"Oh." Smiled Sango "Well don't worry about it... Houshi-sama is very good at exorcisms; almost as good as he is at making up demons and spirits to 'exorcise'." Sango lifted an eyebrow at the monk  
  
"I second that..." said Inu-Yasha  
  
"Oi, I don't hear anyone complaining when they're sleeping over comfortable futons at night." Miroku defended  
  
Shinosuke had lost track of the conversation, but was very much relieved that nothing had been discovered. Kagome hadn't participated in the small conversation. She was still eyeing Shinosuke carefully. Actually since they left in the morning she had thought she felt a youkai presence, but since Inu-Yasha who was the expert hadn't said anything, she thought she had just imagined it. Still she would have known if his Niken were infested, she did after all cut her finger on it. And when he mentioned he wanted an exorcism both Miroku and Inu- Yasha had given him a funny glare... she didn't buy Shinosuke's made up lie or Miroku's, Lord knew he was excellent at it... but she knew a lie when she saw one.  
  
"Kagome..."  
  
She looked up at the sound of her name. Inu-Yasha stood waiting for her while Sango and Shinosuke walked into the town. Miroku dropped behind as well. Kagome stared long and hard at Inu-Yasha, then at Miroku.  
  
"His Niken isn't possessed." She said simply  
  
There was an odd silence between the three of them for a while before Inu-Yasha spoke "Kagome, He doesn't want Sango to know... understood?"  
  
Kagome looked at Inu-Yasha with concern before giving a deep sigh "What's going on Inu-Yasha?"  
  
"I'll have time later on to explain." He said noticing Shinosuke and Sango had noticed the group's fall back  
  
"Fine." She said coldly continuing along the path behind Sango and Shinosuke.  
  
Miroku found them the best inn in the village and Shinosuke finally understood the earlier conversation asking naively if there really was such a spirit over the house. Dinner was pleasant; so much that Kagome had asked for permission to stay in town a few more days. Inu- Yasha was not happy, starting with his usual we-have-more-important-things-to-do argument, but in the end everybody knew the Hanyou had no way of winning the discussion.  
  
"Dinner was delightful." Commented Shinosuke  
  
Sango and Kagome nodded enthusiastically as their plates were being taken away. Miroku stood as soon as the maids left the room and briefly excused himself.  
  
"Where are you going Miroku-sama?" asked Kagome  
  
"I'll be back in a few hours." He said shutting the paper door behind him.  
  
Sango lifted an eye brow "Probably went off to find someone to bear his child..." she said coldly  
  
"Nani?" asked Shinosuke "Find some one to bear his child?"  
  
"Anything with a bosom will do for a mother for that man." She explained curtly  
  
Shinosuke was very much interested in this topic "But..." he took one look around the room and shut up. Sango's face said it all. So he simply responded a small "Oh."  
  
The sky turned velvet blue after dinner and Kagome had managed to drag Inu- Yasha to see the village after Shino had explained this odd village had nightlife almost everyday. Shippou had tagged along as well. Actually Kagome wanted to know exactly what was wrong with Shinosuke. She would get Inu-Yasha to talk even if she had to sit him a hundred times. Mean while Sango and Shinosuke didn't mind the time alone. They never seemed to run out of things to talk about, there was so much to remember. So much to relive.  
  
"Will you stay with us in the village tomorrow?" asked Sango changing the subject abruptly.  
  
He looked down into her pleading brown eyes. His brows dropped "Jou-chan."  
  
"Knowing Inu-Yasha, we'll just be spending one day here. And I... kind of get the idea that you don't want to travel with us to find Naraku, so can't we at least be together one more day?" she pleaded  
  
He almost gave a sigh of relief. So she had dropped the group thing, which was definitely good. And he could hold out for one more day.  
  
"Very well. One more day and I'll leave you to your mission." He agreed.  
  
Sango smiled up at him before another familiar voice called out to her.  
  
"Sango-chan!"  
  
"Kagome-san and Inu-Yasha are back." Turned Shinosuke  
  
Sango smiled at her friend carrying a small finely decorated fan, Shippou on her shoulder was entertained with a paper ball and Inu-Yasha was under a stack of fine fabrics.  
  
"Kagome-chan how did you buy all this?" asked Sango looking at what her friend had returned with.  
  
"You know we always have extra money what with Miroku's little 'rewards' and all." She smiled  
  
Sango's smile died down. Speaking of which, where was the Houshi? It was late already and he said he'd be back in a few hours.  
  
"Well we've had a nice day but it's late." Kagome spoke Sango's mind. "So I'll be off, Oyasumi nasai minna. Come on Inu-Yasha."  
  
The mentioned wobbled to the hall trying not to trip on the fabrics. Shino also stood up helping Sango to her feet.  
  
"She's right, I'm tired as well. We had better call it a day."  
  
Sango nodded.  
  
"See you in the morning Jou-chan." He said turning opposite to where Kagome and Inu-Yasha had gone.  
  
"Oyasumi nasai Shino."  
  
Sango fell behind looking out to the moonlit village giving a small sigh. From the inn on top of a hill you could see part of town and further out, the tip of the large Temple Shino had mentioned.  
  
"He's fine. We saw him wandering around town. He'll probably be back in a while." Said Inu-Yasha heading back to the men's room after having discharged the heap of Fabrics with Kagome.  
  
Sango looked to Inu-Yasha's back as he made his way to where Shino had disappeared. After a moment of silence by herself she gave a nod and made her way towards her room.  
  
°  
  
BTW I got the title of the chap from my favorite song by Savage Garden, I don't own it, I just thought it made a nice accurate name. So don't go and sue me... it went well with the plot though ne? Listen to it if ya haven't. It has the record of being my fav 


	6. Hurtful Truths

Grumpy old women scare and annoy me.... ¬¬  
  
Hurtful Truths   
  
He didn't know if this was worth it anymore. His eyes kept closing and his head was dropping without him even realizing. Still it felt like the right thing to do, so he would continue. Tired feet reached the inn as the first rays of sunlight shone over the hills of the valley. He smiled; at least he had made it in time. Entering the dining area he saw there was only one other traveler there having breakfast.  
  
He didn't want to stay too long; thank goodness the service was quick. He ate quickly but as he was finishing his meal familiar voices were heard in the corridor. Inu-Yasha and Shinosuke stepped in still talking about who knew what.  
  
"Miroku?" asked Inu-Yasha spotting the monk  
  
"Ohayo gozaimasu Shinosuke-san. Inu-Yasha." Miroku greeted as they approached.  
  
"Ohayo." answered Shinosuke uncertainly.  
  
"What are you doing here?" asked Inu-Yasha sitting beside the houshi.  
  
"Eating breakfast." He answered simply.  
  
"I can see that baka."  
  
Miroku raised an eyebrow "You certainly woke up in a bad mood." he noticed.  
  
"You know what I mean Miroku. Wher---"  
  
He didn't get to finish the sentence as the paper door slid open again revealing something no one was expecting to see. Kagome walked in laughing at something she had been talking about. But instead of her usual green skirt and white t-shirt, she had on a wonderful calm yellow kimono. It was decorated with pink flowers along the edges of her sleeves with a deep uneven amber lining at the bottom of it. Her obi was a mellow sky blue held by a shiny white string.  
  
She looked very nice, but the person standing next to her had no comparison, at least in Miroku's opinion. Sango walked into the room smiling at her friend, and when she noticed the three pairs of eyes staring at them she looked down sheepishly at the floor, still with that adorable shy smile. She had on an alluring white kimono that seemed to darken into a deep tone of red at the sleeves and bottom; going from a gleaming white to a blood red. Sakura petals went from her elbow down the sleeves as well as from her knees down to her ankles. These were the opposite of the fabric under them starting with a strong crimson under white at the top then to a dazzling silver over red close to the cuffs. Held tightly at her waist by a forest green obi also with a white string.  
  
His eyes glistened looking at her. She looked like the princess she was. Realizing he was close to drooling, Miroku quickly recovered from his momentary trance when Kagome greeted them.  
  
"Ohayou gozaimasu minna!" she called out cheerfully  
  
Miroku tried to calm down as the girls and Shippou came to sit across from them. It didn't help that she took the place directly in front of him. He took a peak beside him. Kami-sama was Inu- Yasha still gaping? Now, if he drooled at Kagome, that would be funny. Looking past him, Miroku noticed Shinosuke with the same lost eyes. But he wasn't looking at Kagome.  
  
"Ohayo gozaimasu Houshi-sama" Hearing his name at the end of the sentence he looked up to find her smiling shyly at him.  
  
They had both picked up their hair, Kagome in a subtle half tail and Sango in an untidy bun with a few short stray hairs curling up around her neck and shoulders. Gritting his teeth he resisted the urge to shiver "Ohayou gozaimasu Sango, Kagome-san." he smiled pleasantly  
  
Miroku gulped. He had to get out of here. Looking down at his almost finished breakfast he decided it was good enough.  
  
"Sumimasen minna." Getting up quickly he felt everyone's eyes turn to him and somehow made it to the door without running or tripping over his feet. Turning to slide it shut he gave everyone a pleasant smile before he was out of sight. After that he turned around dropping his little façade and let out a deep breath looking up at the wooden ceiling. That image of her would be burned into his mind till the day of his death.  
  
His brows dropped, it was time to go back to work. He walked slowly through the empty corridors of the inn.  
  
Sango looked sadly at the closed door long after Miroku had left. What was the matter with him?? She felt anger rise in her chest before it dawned on her that it was stupid to have such feelings. He had done nothing wrong. They had walked in, said good morning, he had answered politely and calmly excused himself. She had absolutely no reason whatsoever to be angry. Just because he hadn't mention how well she looked? Because his mouth wasn't gaping open like Inu-Yasha's? She smiled bitterly. She was being stupid. Kagome looked to her friend after having fun staring at Inu-Yasha. She should say something.  
  
"How do we look Inu-Yasha?" she asked gleefully  
  
The hanyou panicked. He looked Kagome over for the hundredth time then looked at Sango then back at Kagome, and analyzed the question meticulously.  
  
"Fine?"  
  
Sango's eyebrow twitched and a small vein popped out of Kagome's forehead. Inu-Yasha frowned. 'Damn.'  
  
"Fine?" asked Kagome raising an eyebrow  
  
"No?" asked Inu-Yasha  
  
Shinosuke gave a nervous smile "Two lovely fabrics on two very lovely ladies." He interfered  
  
Sango and Kagome stopped leaning towards Inu-Yasha and turned to Shinosuke. Analyzing his sentence they both smiled and turned pink in the cheeks.  
  
"Arigatou Shinosuke-san, you know what a lady likes to hear." Said Kagome glaring at Inu-Yasha.  
  
He however, was busy sighing in relief at the save Shinosuke had made. But then again, his eyes narrowed, he had made him look bad and implied.... well... stuff! The hanyou glared at him, Shinosuke smiled nervously and shrugged.  
  
Breakfast was fast to come and while eating no matter how much her pride told her not to, Sango gave in to her worry.  
  
"So did Houshi-sama say where he was going?" she asked no one in particular.  
  
"No." said Inu-Yasha looking up from his food "He didn't seem to want to tell us where he had been in the first place either."  
  
"Where he had been?" asked Kagome  
  
"He didn't come back to the inn last night." Answered Shinosuke  
  
"He didn't?" asked Kagome again  
  
Inu-Yasha and Shinosuke shook their heads "He didn't even let me ask where he had gone off to or why he didn't come back. And he looked kind of in a hurry." Said Inu-Yasha finishing up his rice  
  
Kagome looked worriedly from Inu-Yasha to Shinosuke then to Sango. All she saw though was a blur of red.  
  
"I'm done." She said curtly and made her way to the door. Not looking back she unintentionally slammed the paper door against its frame. Sango leaned over the wooden wall of the corridor for support as she felt her heart beating in ears. Her stomach seemed to be jumping up and down as she felt her blood burn through her veins. Her breathing quickened and she felt small beads of sweat form on her palms.  
  
"It can't be. How could you...?" She whispered through gritted teeth.  
  
"Are we going to the village today too?" asked Shippou after the horribly long breakfast.  
  
"I don't know Shippou. We'll have to ask Inu-Yasha." Kagome answered  
  
After all their plates were taken away Inu-Yasha glanced at the paper door. "Ask Sango if she's gonna come. I'm sure if Shinosuke comes she will too."  
  
Kagome glanced at Shinosuke then back at Inu-Yasha and nodded.  
  
"Shippou wait here with Shinosuke-san and Inu-Yasha I won't be long." she said standing from the table.  
  
She almost tripped on the many sheets of fabric of the kimono and with small sweat drop decided it would be the last time she wore one.  
  
Kagome opened the shoji door of their room carefully, not sure of what she would find.  
  
"Sango-chan?" she asked cautiously stepping in.  
  
She had her back to the door and looked like she was doing something with her hands.  
  
"Daijoubu?" Kagome asked as she shut the door behind her.  
  
"Kagome." Said Sango turning to meet her friend, with a smile  
  
Kagome hid the surprise that she felt seeing her friend looking back at her so cheerfully. Two seconds later it hit her that this was nothing but a mask.  
  
"I'm fine. Why do you ask?" Said Sango lifting herself from the tatami with Kirara in her arms  
  
Kagome couldn't have been more exasperated. This was ridiculous. First Miroku now her too? Where the hell would they get to like this?! Both seriously troubled with things to talk about, lying to each other and everyone else. But she wasn't about to explain to her friend that she was asking about this morning, or the fact that Sango had been quick to come up with a possible conclusion as to where he had been last night that was, in Kagome's opinion, somewhat possible but highly improbable.  
  
"Nandemonai." was all she had to say "We're going into town again, Shinosuke is going with us, would you like to come?"  
  
"Sure." She said heading to the door.  
  
"Sango..." started Kagome again  
  
"Nani?" she asked waiting for Kagome to speak as they both made their way out of the small room.  
  
"He would never do that to you." she said shutting the door behind her.  
  
Sango stiffened, gazing emotionlessly at her friend. Kagome met her gaze for a few seconds before deciding it was best to leave her alone for a while. She had only said this because she needed Sango to believe in him. If she didn't, bigger problems would start. Besides it would make anyone feel better to know the person you care for isn't cheating on you ne? She silently went down the hall to meet with the boys knowing Sango would only be a minute. Once Kagome had gone Sango was left alone to think, but did nothing but gaze at the wooden frame of the door.  
  
"Wow look at that pretty fan! That wasn't here yesterday" squealed Kagome "Ohh look at the paintings! There so pretty! Wow! What a pretty colored fabric. Lookie! Amulets for good luck! Kawaii! Little glass figures!"  
  
Shinosuke smiled nervously at the hyperactive teenager looming around every stand in the market admiring one thing or another. He was glad she was with the group or it would have been a very silent trip. He looked over his shoulder to see Sango interested in something at a near by stand and Inu-Yasha simply keeping an eye of for Kagome and the little fox.  
  
He needed to talk to Sango very seriously. After what had happened in the morning he was hesitant on whether to go through with it or not. But as he was already hiding something from her, he would tell her as much as he could without upsetting her. Still it would be best if they were alone. Visiting the marketplace took up about half a day if you just browsed around, but with Kagome; they'd probably be here till dusk. Up until now he had enjoyed it, but he was getting that feeling again and started to regret having come with the group. He hoped nothing would happen though.  
  
Miroku frowned.  
  
Impossible. There couldn't be was nothing whatsoever! He had been here since last night but to no avail. It wasn't where he thought it would be or even in the places he didn't think possible. He had searched everywhere and hadn't found what he wanted. He did however find what he needed. What he 'wanted' wasn't completely necessary he knew, but it would be better if he found it. For now and with what he had he would have to make a very hard decision, which revolved around her.  
  
Deciding it would be best to leave; he made his way to the door and tripped on a loose board on the floor.  
  
"Chikuso." Miroku whispered. He had cut his toe. They should keep this place in a better state.  
  
Shinosuke staggered setting his hand over the nearest thing at hand. A house wall. He tried to get himself under control and slow down his breathing. Today of all days. Inu-Yasha turned his ears then his head back to Shinosuke. Waiting for the girls to get out of hearing range he stepped back to where Shinosuke had stopped suddenly.  
  
"What is it?" Inu-Yasha asked urgently looking him over "You look like hell."  
  
Shinosuke tried for a smile "Can't say I feel any better." He panted  
  
"Are you ok? What is it?" asked Inu-Yasha getting a bit edgy, he eyed the girls, they were still busy with fabrics.  
  
"I'll be fine. I think I better... head back to the inn though." his hand came involuntarily over his stomach as he winced.  
  
"Hai, but what will I tell them?" asked Inu-Yasha still unsure of what to do.  
  
"Just.... tell them I forgot something or ahh!"  
  
Inu-Yasha's brow furrowed, Shinosuke was getting paler by the second, his face was clammy and he really did look like crap. The way his face grimaced it looked like something was eating him from the inside. It freaked him out what if he was...?  
  
"I'll be fine, you better go now or--"  
  
"Houshi-sama."  
  
Inu-Yasha and Shinosuke looked up to find both girls a few feet away looking past them, following Sango's line of sight behind them they spotted Miroku. The monk looked worriedly from Shinosuke to Sango to Inu-Yasha. It was a very awkward moment for a while with all three boys looking nervous. Kagome watched all this from the side. Shinosuke didn't look to good.  
  
Sango looked hard at the monk not knowing what to do or feel at this moment, yet he seemed a bit distracted, his eyes had locked with hers for a moment before he looked worriedly to Inu-Yasha then to Shinosuke. Sensing something she finally broke her gaze looking down at Inu-Yasha who was eyeing Shinosuke with worry in his eyes. Her eyes moved over to him and for the first time she noticed how awful he looked.  
  
"Shinosuke." Her voice broke the relative silence of the busy street.  
  
He had to get up. Shinosuke tried with every fiber in his body to stand upright. He wasn't awake long enough to find out if he had made it.  
  
"Shino!"  
  
Everyone rushed up to the fallen taiji-ya. Sango being the quickest to his side.  
  
"Shino! Shinosuke!" she called out shaking his shoulder lightly  
  
"Oh my gosh is he ok?" asked Kagome with fear in her voice  
  
"What's wrong? What's the matter? Shinosuke!" Sango was getting frightened  
  
"Here! Move!" Inu-Yasha somewhat pushed Sango out of the way lifting the unconscious Shinosuke over his back "I'm taking him back to the inn. Miroku get your ass over there quick."  
  
With that Inu-Yasha leapt off towards the northern part of the city.  
  
"Kirara!"  
  
Miroku turned just in time to see the familiar orange flames erupt around the feline youkai, once transformed, Sango hastily lifted herself on her back and soon they were both rushing after Inu-Yasha. He looked at their fading figure worry clenching his stomach. He knew why Shinosuke had passed out, and now whether he wanted or not Sango would find out. She would be mad at him of course but that wasn't Miroku's business. He broke into a run behind them  
  
"Oi! Matte Miroku-sama!"  
  
Sango sat by his futon looking down at the sleeping face she had forgotten but had always known so well. Because of the urgency to get him someplace safe, nothing had been explained as to what had happened. Her fists clenched. She should have known this was too good to be true.  
  
The rice paper door slid open but she didn't bother to look up. Who ever it was, she didn't care. The familiar cling of rings made her stiffen. Except him.  
  
Miroku looked down cautiously at her serious face. Then stepped in the room and left the bowl of water in the counter corner of the door. He glanced down again; her eyes were glued to Shinosuke. He gave a silent sigh and walked back to the door.  
  
"You knew didn't you?"  
  
Her voice stopped him a step from the door. She didn't make another move nor give a sign that she had even spoken. She simply waited for an answer. Miroku looked at the paper door inches from his face then down at his hand over the frame.  
  
"Why didn't you tell me...?" she spoke again.  
  
Miroku's brows furrowed as he finally decided to turn and face her. She was looking up to him with much more than anger in her eyes. Simply the aura she gave off was disturbing.  
  
"Sango." He tried  
  
"Why?" she interrupted "Didn't think I could take it? Wanted to protect my feelings? Didn't want me to suffer anymore? That's nothing but crap. If one of those was your excuse don't even mention it... I'm perfectly capable of taking care of myself and living my life as it is. I've done pretty well on my own so far. And if you can't understand that then you'd have to be pretty damn dense." She took a gulp of air before continuing.  
  
"When will you quit treating me like I'm this fragile creature made of glass that has to be protected and taken care of always? I'm not helpless!"  
  
"Sango, it wasn't--." tried Miroku again  
  
"There's no excuse for what you did Houshi-sama." She interrupted again, realizing she didn't want to hear anything he would say to her. "How... could you?"  
  
"Sango." Interrupted a third voice  
  
Miroku and Sango looked down at the person laying on the futon. He was still pale but apparently better and fully awake.  
  
"Shinosuke are you ok?" asked Sango worriedly taking a hand to his forehead  
  
"I'm fine," he said dismissingly taking her had away "Listen Jou- chan... Miroku-sama didn't ---"  
  
"I didn't mean to hurt you Sango." Miroku quickly interrupted "For that I'm sorry. I honestly had no ill intention to you. And I told Shino it would be best if you didn't know for it could upset you."  
  
"I expect no less from you." She answered coldly  
  
He gave a hurt smile "I can be no one else."  
  
Miroku looked down sadly at Sango then quickly gave Shinosuke a warning look. He looked up uncertainly at the monk and simply gave a sigh. Miroku offered Sango a meek smile.  
  
"Gomen nasai... I suppose I'll simply have to wait for the day when you are ready to forgive me."  
  
Shinosuke frowned.  
  
"What's going on?" she said desperately. "What is all this about? Shino?"  
  
Miroku stood through the awkward silence wondering if he should leave or stay. He found he couldn't move his legs when Shinosuke began to speak of the youkai inside his body. He tried hard to just turn and leave when Sango's face twisted with horror and sadness after Shinosuke had told her. Finally after minutes of eternal silence Miroku slowly slid open the shoji door and left, leaving Shinosuke with a saddened face and Sango with that utter look of horror and sorrow in her features.  
  
He gave a sigh once in the hall. How could the situation be any worse?  
  
She made no sound on the wooden floor as she walked gloomily down the halls of the inn. After Miroku had left she had turned to her friend pleading him to tell her it wasn't true. That it had to be a mistake, that there had to be some way to save him. When he looked up at her with somber eyes and set a warm hand over hers she panicked. It was true. This was really happening. She pulled her hand back and hastily excused herself from his room.  
  
Sliding the door shut she rubbed the sleeve of her kimono frantically against her eyes to hold in the tears. This was so wrong. She needed someone to talk to. She had to find Kagome. Trying hard to push a whirl of thoughts out of her head she stopped at the sound of Inu-Yasha's voice. He was taking to someone; she only hoped it wasn't Kagome. A male's voice answered him though. She sighed with relief.  
  
"The Shrine?" asked Inu-Yasha again  
  
"Hai."  
  
Sango backed up to the wall leaning close to the rice paper door. It was Miroku he was talking to.  
  
"Where did you sleep then?" asked Inu-Yasha  
  
Sango waited for his answer, nothing came for a while, before Inu-Yasha spoke again.  
  
"Baka."  
  
She gave a sigh. That idiot had been awake all night?  
  
"What were you doing that was so important you couldn't even sleep?" Came Inu-Yasha's voice again  
  
"I was trying to find a way to save him."  
  
Her brows dropped, was he talking about Shino? She raised a clenched fist to her lips. Kagome's small morning comment came to her mind and she suddenly felt very guilty for having come up with rushed conclusions on where he had been last night. He hadn't even slept.  
  
"Did you?" asked Inu-Yasha  
  
Sango shook off her troubled emotions, waiting for an answer. There was an uneasy pause before Miroku spoke again.  
  
"I can save him."  
  
She took in a sharp breath. All new thoughts and emotions running through her mind again. Relief washed over her so deeply it seemed nullifying. She almost didn't catch the last part of the conversation.  
  
"But...?" asked Inu-Yasha  
  
Biting back a smile Sango strived to hear the next comment. It began to make her feel uneasy when nobody spoke for a while.  
  
"I'd be an exchange." Miroku answered finally  
  
"What... does that mean? What kind of an exchange?"  
  
Brows furrowed, Sango shared Inu-Yasha's doubt.  
  
"A life for a life."  
  
A cold hand grasped at her heart.  
  
"Who's?" asked Inu-Yasha slowly  
  
"whose life do you think I'd be willing to sacrifice if not my own?"  
  
Sango's world went black for a second and she didn't even feel herself slide down the wall. When everything stopped spinning she only felt she was sitting over her legs, her head still glued to the wall. Things could not have been worse. Trying to stop panting she listened still. Nothing was said for a while until Miroku spoke again.  
  
"The night he told us about the youkai, he mentioned something about an exorcism in which the parasite is simply moved from one body to another. That's the technique I found. But as much as I searched I couldn't find the exorcism to eliminate it, without the sacrifice of the other host."  
  
No, no no no, it was just too much death. Tears gathered in the corner of her eyes. There was another troubled pause in the conversation before Inu- Yasha asked the question she was dreading to hear  
  
"What are you going to do then?"  
  
She held her breath for his answer fearing that he would say yes and fearing he would say no. No sound came and she felt as if her heart were about to burst. She needed to know! The only thing she heard was Inu-Yasha give a long sigh and a sad:  
  
"I see."  
  
I am still, SO very evil... :) smiles sweetly of course most of you already know what happens so it kinda takes the drama away, but I don't give a hey! Hahaha!  
  
coughs 


	7. Fated Decision

Evil genius ne? chuckles one of the best compliments I've ever received, arigatou ShadowRayne  
  
Moving sucks.... I'm gonna miss my old house... sorry if I took ages, there was no where I could get connected.... and also I couldn't really find my computer since it was in a box marked movies... ¬¬  
  
A Fated Decision   
  
Sango felt her nails digging into the skin of her palms. What had he decided? The halls of the inn seemed to start pressing in against her and suddenly she found it very hard to breathe. Her jaw tightened. What would he do? She tried to relax. What did she want his answer to be? And why was she so nervous in the first place? It was a decision between the man she loved and her best friend. She didn't want to loose either of them. But if she had a choice? What would she want Miroku to decide?  
  
"Jou-chan?"  
  
She gasped jumping suddenly and turning her head to the familiar voice.  
  
"Are you all right?" Shinosuke asked looking sideways at her.  
  
She looked up to his eyes full of preoccupation then glanced back at the door. She didn't want to leave but what would she tell him. That she was eavesdropping on a conversation that would decide whether he would live or die? He offered her a hand. Knowing she would regret it, she offered him a small smile and accepted his help.  
  
"Hai... Daijoubu." she said being pulled up from the floor  
  
It had suddenly hit Shinosuke that he probably didn't have as much time as he thought. And he definitely didn't want to leave this world with something as important as 'this' still unresolved. If he hadn't been unconscious all afternoon maybe he wouldn't have to be doing this so hurriedly.  
  
Leading her out to the porch beside the garden, it became an awkward moment. The cloudy night didn't help much either. He couldn't very well just sit there in complete silence and blurt it out. So he tried starting with a reasonable conversation. Past experiences. She seemed to be a bit relived when he started to talk, and very quickly the mood had lightened as much as it could with the surrounding situation.  
  
"I remember the day they sent us to the village up north, remember the really grassy one?" asked Sango peering at the dark night sky  
  
"Hai, where the green snake was ne?" he answered his nerves already tensing. The conversation had gone on for a little longer than he had expected. It was time to get this over with.  
  
"Aa... I remember I was knocked out. When I woke up, instead of being relieved you got all angry at me." She smiled  
  
"Of course I was angry Jou-chan it would have been me if you hadn't gotten in the way."  
  
"And? Was I just supposed to stand there and watch you get hurt? What do you take me for Shinosuke?" she said a little touchier than she had intended, this thought brought on a whole heap of related feelings "Why does everyone think it's fine for them to sacrifice themselves for me but I can't do the same for them? The guilt starts packing on after a while."  
  
Shinosuke raised an eyebrow "Everyone?"  
  
Sango scowled. She hadn't said it on purpose, but 'he' always seemed to find a crevice to sneak into her mind, even with the most idle conversations or thoughts.  
  
"Nandemonai..." she didn't want to get into this now of all times. "I decided it was fine if something happened to me and not you because... well it's just that I was sure I cared more for you than for myself."  
  
"And did you think I didn't care for you the same way?" There... it had started. He swallowed a lump in his throat.  
  
"Well... I wasn't sure... I mean caring for a friend is only so much affection, but I--" she debated on whether she should go on or not... it had been 2 years after all, and the situation was so complicated. "I was different...."  
  
Shinosuke's face became solemn as he looked out at the dark night. "I know..."  
  
Sango looked up to him with shining brown eyes, in the distance the light patter drops against the roof of the inn and the crackling of the dry grass was the only sound for a while before Sango finally recovered her voice. "What?"  
  
"Jou-chan..." he began with a small smile looking down at her. "I knew everything..."  
  
There was uncomfortable silence. Too many thoughts and emotions were passing through her head. It was something that wasn't easy to believe just like that, too many connections were being made. There were so many things that didn't fit in and that she couldn't explain and others that she didn't get in the past and now they all seemed to have a reason.  
  
She was too quiet, and that expression of utter surprise wasn't helping either. He should say something. He knew he had to continue, but his mouth didn't seem to want to obey his mind. Either way Sango beat him to it.  
  
"Yumi." was all she could make sense out of in her jumble of thoughts.  
  
Shinosuke looked down at the wooden porch. So the difficult part first ne? "Yumi loved me." He began. That had been his excuse since the beginning, and now he was using it again "She told me this... a few weeks before I told you."  
  
"And you? Did you...?" Sango interrupted gazing deeply at him  
  
He looked down at those eyes full of question. She wasn't making this any easier. This is what he had been dreading to tell her since, well since the day that he had told her the whole Yumi story.  
  
"No." He said simply  
  
Her heart felt like it were about to burst. "But..." she choked out.  
  
"Jou-chan." he began finally looking up to her shiny brown eyes again "Sango."  
  
The sound of her name on his lips for some reason made her take in short breaths; she could feel her blood pumping through every limb in her body. What the --? She was over him. She had... set him aside. There was someone else now. The thought of Miroku some how calmed her down considerably, but what he said next definitely couldn't be held in.  
  
"I loved you."  
  
Her gasp was caught at the back of her throat. Each word was being repeated over and over again finally forming that illogical sentence. That impossible phrase. She shook her head, no no he had to stop this.  
  
"Shinosuke."  
  
"Please listen." He said setting his hand on her shoulder.  
  
She pulled away uncertainly but he didn't let go. He found it was impossible to look down at those hurting glazed eyes and looked down at the growing drops of rain falling over the yellow tainted grass deciding it would be easier to continue like this.  
  
"I was... scared out of my mind..." he tried smiling "I had known for a while what you felt for me. At first I thought it was impossible. Then after I finally assimilated the thought, I stupidly began to analyze myself, only to find out that I felt more than friendship for you as well. I'm an odd person Jou-Chan... you know that. The idea of love for me wasn't a wonderful picture of happiness. For me love meant pain and broken hearts and separation. Kaa-san had been miserable her whole life because of Otou-san. And then your mother died and... your father was devastated. I had no real example of what the 'happiness of love' meant. The thought of us being in constant danger and one day loosing you was... something I wouldn't have been able to bear."  
  
She hadn't even realized she was crying. She would have slapped him silly. Everything he was saying had some sense to it but it was all wrong.  
  
"Ahou." was all that her mind came up with  
  
"I know that now..." he said finally daring to look up at her. He tried for a smile. "The only reason I married Yumi was because I wasn't in love with her. That way she could never hurt me as you could."  
  
Her eyes widened and her jaw loosened leaving her gaping at him. Something inside of her erupted. She didn't have to think much before her hand crashed against his cheek. Her palm stung. She had her fair practice what with that hentai in the group, but this was something far deeper than meaningless games with Miroku. Shinosuke stared at nothing for a while, blood rushing up to his left cheek. He didn't say anything as the face of shock wore down. He didn't know why he was surprised; he actually expected much worse from the huntress. Funny how it seemed to hurt a lot more.  
  
"How could you have been so selfish?" she barely whispered.  
  
He didn't bother to look up at her while his features saddened. He knew he would find nothing but sadness and anger in her eyes. And he already had enough of that. Realizing to late what he was doing his arms wound around her back and his head came down gently over her shoulder. She went rigid but he didn't care. He needed her to be with him right now.  
  
"I haven't been able to forgive myself Jou-chan. I haven't found an answer as to why I was so stupid... I didn't want to feel any pain or... hurt the person that meant the most to me..."  
  
Her arms still down at her sides she could do nothing to escape his embrace; she simply tried to hold in her tears, which she found was useless as well.  
  
"I ended up suffering so much more, and causing you a pain I didn't even know existed. Nothing came out right... why did I do it Jou-chan?" he held her tighter "I'm so sorry." he muffled into her shoulder  
  
Oh this was ridiculous. She thought swallowing back more tears. Everyone made mistakes and, it was logical he was afraid of pain with the family he grew up with. She took his shoulders and pushed him away sniffing more of her tears. She looked up to the face of a boy. A boy who had just been scolded for making up a lie. She gave him a crooked smile.  
  
"Shino... you don't have to carry all the blame." She started waiting until he looked down at her again "It's ok to be afraid once in a while, you aren't the only one who is uncertain. Many people shield themselves from such deep feelings; just as scared as you were."  
  
She gave an uncertain pause. Then focused again at the situation at hand. "You just have to know the whole truth, there is so much more to love than pain and sacrifice. There's also joy and happiness so pure if fills every part of your being and..."  
  
She stopped, both of loss of words and at the meaningful smile on Shinosuke's face.  
  
"You've gone through this already ne?" he noticed  
  
Sango caught herself realizing what she had just said. Shinosuke watched with fascination as her mouth suddenly seemed to get smaller and a light rosy color came to her cheeks. She looked away sheepishly at the curtain of water falling just beyond the porch. Not knowing how he could have pushed away such a wonderful person he cupped her face gently lifting her eyes to him again.  
  
"Only you didn't have someone wonderful by your side to help you understand and get through it like I did ne?"  
  
Sango looked up to those familiar blue eyes, the look she had forgotten. She panicked when she realized. Nothing in her body seemed to move. She wasn't even breathing properly as he loomed in over her. Her brain was yelling frantically, pull back! Pull back! But as much as she wanted to, her neck arched forward. Nothing could be done, all that was moving was the adrenaline running through her veins.  
  
She didn't want this!... Did she?  
  
His eyes closed at the same time hers widened.  
  
He wanted to tell her. It was necessary he sit down and have a serious talk with her. After all a life wasn't something to be taken lightly, whether it was Shinosuke's or his. At this time of night it was most likely she be out on the porch, probably gazing away into the stars, well the rain.  
  
Miroku knew she had been outside in the hallway while he was discussing the situation with Inu-Yasha, but only because the hanyou had told him after she left. Just as well; if she had heard everything there wouldn't be as much to explain. Still she probably didn't know what he had decided as he didn't say anything out loud. He had only answered Inu-Yasha with a long sigh and a small shrug of his shoulders.  
  
The thing was, he didn't want to make a decision without hearing what Sango had to say about it. What if he did something stupid she would never forgive him for? Even though he knew it would not be the easiest thing to talk about with her, it had to be done. Turning a corner of the large inn he found himself with the open view of its wide garden being showered by the night's downpour obscuring most of the colorful flowers.  
  
Time stood still.  
  
He couldn't feel anything but the excruciating pain that exploded inside his chest. He couldn't hear but the yell of silence prolonging the horrible experience. His eyes couldn't look away from the person he loved most in this world... kissing another.  
  
He couldn't move; not even to express the shock or the pain he was feeling. He couldn't breathe or think or do anything but stare at Shino's fingers coming through her long hair flowing freely down her back, at her arched neck, at his hand over her cheek.  
  
It would never end. Some terrified part of his mind was convinced that this moment would go on forever. He wanted to leave, he wanted nothing more than for it to be an illusion, he wanted her dark slender figure to turn and reveal another girl Shinosuke was kissing that he didn't know. One he wasn't in love with. A tiny voice in his head kept mocking, as if burning an already open wound. 'This is what you wanted... ne?'  
  
Happiness... Hers, not his own.  
  
'Very well...' reacted his mind finally 'The decision has been made.'  
  
"Did you find anything?" Kagome asked for fiftieth time  
  
"As I said five minutes ago. No!" yelled back the Inu-Yasha  
  
"Well there has to be something!" she yelled exasperated "It's impossible that in this whole damn shrine there is nothing about that parasite!"  
  
"Kagome... Shinosuke looked, Miroku looked, what the hell do you think we're gonna find?"  
  
"Well we have to find something Inu-Yasha I'm not letting either of them die." She yelled angrily back.  
  
"You think I like the idea of one of em' being taken out in such a pathetic way?!" he yelled back just as fiercely. "They're my friends too dammit!"  
  
Kagome calmed down a bit. They felt the same way, and it was useless to stand there and yell at each other for no reason. But it was frustrating not being able to do anything. She got angry at herself when her eyes began to sting and sparkle. It wouldn't do any good to start crying now. A large but gentle hand came over her shoulder.  
  
She looked up to Inu-Yasha who was wearing a similar expression. Without thinking much of it, she wound her arms around his back not caring what he would think. She needed to be near him right now. Tense at the first contact, he then relaxed and set his arms over her back as well. The mere thought of being in Sango's shoes scared her to no end. What would she do if she had to choose between to people as important to her as the person she loved and the person who once owned her heart? What would she do if she lost Inu-Yasha? She gripped his gi tighter.  
  
Inu-Yasha kept silent listening to the patter of the night rain outside, noticing a few leaks on the roof letting through an occasional drop to the already battered, swollen wooden floor. It wasn't his favorite situation. She was probably crying over him right now. The worst part about it was, there was nothing that could be done about it this time. He could do nothing but give a pathetic sigh for both Sango and Miroku.  
  
His lips finally left hers. She hadn't moved, so much as batted her eyes. She hadn't done anything to continue or even recognize the kiss, that's when he realized how incredibly stupid what he was doing was. Reason came to him like a hot brass. What had he done?  
  
He couldn't look at her; he couldn't even be near her. Her face still held that initial shock. A reddish tone overcame her cheeks and her fists in her lap were so tightly clenched her knuckles where white. What had he done? He felt like kicking himself. He knew her love wasn't his anymore. In a strange way he sensed it never was. And even knowing all of this he had let his impulses get the best of him.  
  
"Sango I..." he began  
  
"You're too late..." she interrupted sadly  
  
Hmmm, I hadn't realized how againsty this fic is until now.... I need a comedy.... --' 


	8. The Meaning of a Promise

Deep Promises   
  
"You're too late."  
  
There was still the slightest ting of pink lingering on her cheeks as she said this, but her face no longer held the shock of his unexpected action, it was simply looking up to him calmly waiting for what ever his answer could be.  
  
'Too late' his mind repeated. He knew, he knew the moment she had turned to look at the monk when they met up three days back; it was obvious to anyone that she had deep feelings for him, and that he reciprocated. If only his own love could be controlled at will. Sadly there was nothing he could do but wish her happiness and stand aside. Just like she had done two years back. Only this time there where no lies or secrets, everything was real. From her happiness, to the houshi's love, to his own pain. Truth be told he rather it be him the one to suffer.  
  
"I know." Shinosuke whispered  
  
He didn't even notice his hand was still over her right cheek until her soft small ones brought it down to his lap.  
  
"I'm sorry." She said gazing into his eyes.  
  
He offered her a small smile "You don't have to be. What you feel for him is real. And I assure you he feels the same towards you."  
  
Her face finally expressed a bit of surprise as the color came back to her cheeks. "How did...?"  
  
Shinosuke's smile widened. "Come on now Jou-chan you should know by now that I'm not as clueless as I look."  
  
The pink in her cheeks darkened into a soft cherry as he continued  
  
"And even if I was, both of you are so discrete you'd be better off yelling it out. Just like the hanyou and the odd girl."  
  
The mood had changed and he was glad, especially to see she had no more pain in her eyes.  
  
"Just keep an eye on him and be patient... he's a little slow."  
  
In spite of herself a smile crept up to her face and she fought back a chuckle. Shino followed along glad this was finally over with.  
  
"Make sure you don't loose this one too ne?" he warned  
  
She smiled sheepishly up at him "Daijoubu... I'm not completely convinced that he feels what I feel for him but, he promised he would never leave me alone..."  
  
He raised an eye brow "Hontou?"  
  
Sango scratched her hairline "Well... something like that..."  
  
"You shouldn't do this so often Houshi-sama... it could be dangerous in battles if you don't get enough sleep." She said plucking the strings of grass under her palms  
  
The full moon was watching over her and Miroku. It was midnight, when most of their normal conversations took place. They had left their comrades back over a small hill. Sango had been having a bad dream; nothing out of the ordinary but enough to get her to wake up sweating. And Miroku was just up as usual. Both were now talking under the cool blanket of the night and the steady bubbling of a river they had just in front of them.  
  
"When I'm sleepy... I sleep. What point is there to keep myself up if I want to relax, and what point is there to sleep if I'm not actually tired?"  
  
She glared at him. She hated it when he made a point.  
  
"The one who should be sleeping is you." He continued  
  
"What if something should happen to you one of the nights you go off wandering alone." She ignored his last comment "there would be no one around to help you and something serious could happen."  
  
"I don't plan to die just yet Sango." He smiled looking up at the moon "But you have to know that I will someday and when I do you'll just have to move on."  
  
"You make it sound so easy." she murmured setting her chin over her knees  
  
She plucked another blade of grass from under her palms looking down at the river between the hills they were resting over. Honestly, he made it sound as if it were the same as loosing her boot or something.  
  
"Why wouldn't it be?" he asked curiously  
  
Her back straitened as she met his gaze, she felt her face redden. Dammit! He had heard her? That didn't matter, what shocked was the question he had just made.  
  
"No!" she said somewhat offended  
  
His factions settled neutrally. "Doushite?"  
  
Her stomach clenched tightly. "Because." she began feeling very stupid. She had to say something. Just not, everything. "Loosing a friend isn't something you get through easily. It takes strength and time and... a little pain."  
  
She waited nervously to see if what she had said was enough. Dozens of other thoughts came to her mind, things that would have sounded better or smarter or... anything!  
  
"But it would hurt more to loose a person you love than me ne?" he said quietly  
  
Her heart missed a beat.  
  
"Being only your friend, would it make that much of a difference to you if I stepped out of your life?"  
  
He continued before she even had a chance to blink. Dammit with his stupid questions! He didn't even give her time to think. Her mouth stuttered while she came up with something to say.  
  
"Baka Houshi!" she blurted unintentionally "Do you honestly think that if you just left you wouldn't be missed...? By anyone?" She added quickly "Besides, we need you on our side to defeat Naraku. We were... in this together ne?"  
  
Yes, that was fine... reasonable at least. She hadn't intended for that baka houshi part but, what was done was done. Why didn't he say anything? Did he have to be staring at her? And what in all Kami-sama's glory did that 'loosing the person you love instead of me' thing mean?! He smiled.  
  
"Very well... I do not wish to be the person who is responsible for making you suffer. So after we defeat Naraku will you let me die in peace?" he asked lightheartedly  
  
Sango gave a small sigh "Only if you promise to fight alongside m-, us," she caught herself quickly "Until then... and not do something stupid like get yourself killed. Or leave the group or something..."  
  
Miroku raised an eyebrow. "I can't give you any guarantee's about the doing something stupid part. But I won't leave the group and if I can help it, I won't get myself killed. I will accept to everything you have just said... if you do as well..."  
  
Sango gave a small hmm? Finally looking up to the smiling monk. Then pressed her lips together determinedly "Deal."  
  
"It's a promise then." smiled Miroku "And now we must do something physically symbolic that will bind our pact." he said that smile of his creeping on his lips.  
  
Sango's eye twitched as a small vein popped up on her forehead. One day he would know how uncomfortable that was. The next sound heard was the yell of the houshi being thrown into the night air and landing with a big splash in the river. Sango stomped away back to camp.  
  
"Symbolic enough for you?" she asked angrily.   
  
Shinosuke raised an eyebrow walking through the halls of the inn to his room again "My, what a... special relationship you have..." he said unsurely  
  
Sango smiled "Special is not the word I would use..." she confessed  
  
"Odd? Disturbing? Peculiar? Unsettling?" he offered  
  
She eyed him and he offered a light chuckle. They turned left to where their bedrooms were across from each other and both stopped seeing the person they were talking about leaning against Shinosuke's room.  
  
"Houshi-sama." Said Sango eying him curiously  
  
"I found it." he replied with a small smile  
  
The couple in front of him stared. "Found what Houshi-sama?" asked Sango  
  
"I found a way to save Shinosuke." He finished  
  
Surprise filled Shinosuke as he heard this along with a ray of hope and relief. Could it be true though? Sango on the other hand wasn't as surprised as she should have been, better yet concern filled her face.  
  
"I had actually found a way to save you before; do you remember you mentioned a transfer?" Miroku asked Shinosuke, noticing the look on Sango's face.  
  
He was still a bit numb from having heard what the monk had to say, but his factions became serious when he mentioned the transfer. "I'm not going to let you die for me Houshi-sama if that's what you're getting at." He said quickly  
  
Shino was not about to trade the life of the man Sango loved for his own. It was ridiculous. Sango said nothing but looked nervously form one to another. She jumped when Miroku turned to look at her.  
  
"You already know ne?" he asked  
  
Sango swallowed, so he knew she was eavesdropping in the hallway. She nodded shyly red in the face.  
  
"Houshi-sama I won't let you." Interrupted Shinosuke again  
  
"I won't die after the transfer Shinosuke. I found a way to save myself as well."  
  
Miroku looked up at two wide eyes full of hope. And waited for them to ask questions, when they didn't speak he decided to continue.  
  
"I gave a last visit to the temple and found a way to survive... if you like we can do this right now."  
  
Both were to overwhelmed to speak, but finally it was Sango who broke the silence. "You can save him?" she asked  
  
Miroku looked down to the familiar auburn eyes he had grown so fond of. To see them full of hope and happiness brought a sad smile to his lips.  
  
"Hai."  
  
"Are you sure you want to be here Sango?" Miroku asked  
  
She nodded determinedly. The three of them were now in Shinosuke's room; he was lying on the futon stomach down and his gi down to his lower back. Miroku by his side was preparing for the transfer. He had an uncertain look on his face knowing Sango didn't really need to see this. It wasn't going to be pleasant for anyone. He knew however that she was determined, not to say stubborn, so he didn't push it further.  
  
"Very well. Shinosuke, are you ready?" asked Miroku  
  
"When ever you are ready to start Houshi-sama." He answered back  
  
"Don't call me that." He said pushing away a bucket of water "My father gave me a name for a reason ne? I'd be nice if it were used more often."  
  
Shinosuke looked up from over his shoulder greeted by a crooked smile from the monk as he pushed his gi out of the way. Parting her lips slightly Sango turned to look at Miroku who didn't meet her gaze. Maybe she was making too much of it but, she had the feeling his statement was not meant for Shinosuke. She honestly never even considered that. Calling him by his first name. Surely she noticed, and by all means did it on purpose. But it was, well respect. She didn't know it bothered him, not this much at least. And to be honest, saying his name, well... she was too shy to do it. People could call her crazy, saying it was just his name, but they didn't know. They wouldn't know it was so much more to her than that. It meant giving him solid structure in her heart. And that was scary for her.  
  
"Hai." Smiled Shinosuke "Gomen Miroku-sama."  
  
Sango shook her head, pushing aside her train of thoughts, this was not the time to be thinking about such things. Miroku nodded, feeling the nervousness that was going around the room. He pulled back the sleeve of his left arm and gently set a nervous hand over the black mark on Shinosuke's back. He closed his eyes in concentration setting the index and pointer of his right hand over his knuckles.  
  
Shinosuke was the first to protest, Sango watched as his fist's balled up over the covers of his futon. Miroku gave a muffled groan as Sango saw his face begin to shine with his own sweat. Shinosuke gave small yelp of pain before pressing his eyes shut and gritting his teeth. Miroku's breath was getting faster by each passing second and a gray tone came to his cheeks.  
  
Sango noticed the temperature of the room began to increase as they strived more each time to get the pain under control. She was beginning to regret having stayed. Suddenly jumping as both men gave a muffled yell of pain, she saw it emerge. Sango watched with wide eyes as the black mark on Shinosuke's back became three dimensional being sucked out of him and drawn into Miroku's hand. It looked like nothing but a jumble of thick threads. Or jointed arms of some sort that seemed to meet in the middle to form a small solid body. Each tentacle was a deep crimson color, she didn't know if this was its real color or it was just Shinosuke's blood. Each one ended in a sort of scalpel with a small opening. They were tubes. The tentacles were being pulled out slowly, one at a time. Maybe this was what hurt so much.  
  
Miroku's hands over Shino's back began to tremble more each time a tentacle was extracted from Shinosuke's body into his palm. About six left in Shinosuke's body. four, three.  
  
One.  
  
Sango jumped gasping as both men yelled out suddenly. Miroku was pushed back against the wall and Shino was left panting over the futon.  
  
"What happened?" she asked worriedly.  
  
Shinosuke from the futon opened his eyes briefly and gave her a small smile; before they closed on their own again, he was awfully pale. His panting died down and he soon fell asleep on the soft bed.  
  
"Shinosuke!" she set a hand over his shoulder. It was clammy.  
  
"You need to... seal the wound."  
  
Sango turned to find Miroku with his head resting against the wall. He was still breathing forcefully and his left hand was trembling terribly. He winced, a dark ting coming to his cheeks.  
  
"Houshi-sama." She said about to go to his aid.  
  
"The wound..." he said again shaking his head at her. "On his back... it's still bleeding."  
  
She looked from one to another. It was true; on Shinosuke's back where the creature had been there was a single vertical slash of seeping blood.  
  
"Other than that..." continued Miroku "He'll be fine..."  
  
Sango looked back to Miroku "What about you?"  
  
"I'm not going anywhere..." He offered her a smile. "Tend to him first..."  
  
She had done it hesitantly but finally agreed. He tried to get up and leave while she was tending to his wound, but it was impossible, he couldn't even move his head. Had Shinosuke really had to put up with this sort of pain? Since when? He could feel the creature running through his bloodstream leaving a trace of what felt like acid along the way. It was probably headed for his back. He gave a frustrated sigh when she had finished binding Shinosuke's back and turned towards him.  
  
She kneeled down next to him taking a cool hand to his forehead; at least to him it felt cool. "You don't look so good." She stated  
  
He shook his head "Daijoubu..."  
  
She didn't buy it, less when she took his shaking left hand in hers. She gave a small gasp when he opened his fist half covered in blood, the same vertical slit in his palm as in Shinosuke's back.  
  
"Hold on." She said hurriedly retrieving the bandages from beside Shinosuke's bed.  
  
He winced slightly when she dipped his hand in a bowl of water, and watched some of his own blood seep into the liquid dissolving amongst it to a light peach color. He didn't turn to face her while she wiped off the water and blood, or while she bandaged it. He couldn't.  
  
"There..." she said giving a satisfied smile  
  
He returned it, though not looking her directly in the eyes. This was ridiculous, he had to get out of here anyway. With all the effort he could muster, he managed to get up leaning on the wall for support.  
  
"Arigatou..." he said trying not to look the way he felt as he made his way to the door "I suspect he'll be fine by tomorrow morning. You should get to bed as well, it's late."  
  
He slid the shujoi door open and stepped out into the hall. Trying to relax his breathing he slid the door shut behind him and made his way down the hall where he and Inu-Yasha were sleeping. The sound of her voice froze him on the spot.  
  
"Houshi-sama..."  
  
He strived to ignore the sick feeling in his stomach when his muscles didn't react just the way he wanted them to. Still the tone of her voice made him look back to her squarely.  
  
"Yes?" he asked quietly, afraid his voice might break  
  
Sango looked over to him with worried mahogany eyes and walked over to him. She pushed herself into his chest, making him take a few steps back to balance himself, and wound her arms around his back. Surprised as he was, he welcomed the external support she was giving him. Desperately attempting not to lean too much on her  
  
"You don't know how much this means to me..." she said into his robes.  
  
A tinge of pain crossed his heart. He did know how much it meant to her.  
  
"You kept your promise." She finished  
  
He had to think this over for a few seconds, looking down at her hair, confused before it dawned on him what she was talking about. His eyes gleamed with guilt. He had forgotten. How could he have pushed something as important as that out of his mind at a time like this?  
  
He had to hide his emotions almost immediately as she released him looking up with an uncertain smile. He then realized he hadn't done so much as hug her back.  
  
"Arigatou." She said quietly looking down to the floor. "Oyasumi nasai."  
  
With that she turned down the hall to the room across from Shinosuke's glancing at him one last time before she shut the paper door behind her. Once she did he let out a deep breath grabbing whatever was closest to keep himself from falling forward.  
  
"Baka Houshi!" she said angrily "Do you honestly think that if you just left you wouldn't be missed...? By anyone?" She blushed still with that indignant look in her eyes "Besides, we need you on our side to defeat Naraku. We were... in this together ne?"   
  
Her voice seemed to echo against the walls of the inn as he felt the creature dig further into his body.  
  
"Very well... I do not wish to be the person who is responsible for making you suffer. So after we defeat Naraku will you let me die in peace?" he had asked smiling  
  
She looked down at her hands "Only if you promise to fight alongside m- , us," he raised an eyebrow at her pause "until then, and not do something stupid like get yourself killed. Or leave the group or something..."   
  
He felt like punching the wall, he probably would have if he hadn't been swaying so much or trying to blink off the fogginess.  
  
"Deal!" said the voice of her memory faintly.   
  
"Deal...?" he repeated  
  
--' one more chap to go before I go again, but don't worry vacations are just 2 weeks away, so I'll be finished before june.....  
  
thank you for all the nice reviews! 


	9. Realization

Hmmm.... nothing interesting 2 say right now... oh yeah, don't forget about the dream sequence ()  
  
Realizations   
  
"We should head back... it's probably going to start raining harder in a while. I can barely see as it is." Said Inu-Yasha looking out the door of the shrine.  
  
With only the light of a candle by their side, both of them had grown quite tired. And it was useless to continue if they weren't even concentrating on what they were doing. Kagome gave deep sigh setting down the book in her hands and nodded.  
  
"You're right. We should probably head back. They might be worried about us and, to tell you the truth I'm a little concerned about them as well." She said  
  
Inu-Yasha looked back at her, watching the light of the candle flicker against her face full of concern. His fists clenched when it became clear that there was nothing he could do for her, or anyone.  
  
"Let's go then." He said turning back.  
  
Kagome got up stretching her cramped legs for a second.  
  
"What the fu--?!"  
  
Inu-Yasha's voice made her turn suddenly seeing his face looming in quickly to hers and then drop out of her line of sight to fall upon her chest and push her back.  
  
"Ite!" she called as they both hit the floor  
  
The pain on her backside however wasn't what worried her at this moment.  
  
His whole body twitching slightly he commanded himself to get off her. Or at least move him face. He couldn't breath very well and the blood rushing to his face wasn't helping. The horrible thing about it was... he was very comfortable. Kagome looked down, her eyes wide.  
  
"Eechi!!" she shrieked trying to scramble away from under him  
  
Inu-Yasha finally recovered from the fall scuttling away red in the face "Why'd ya get in the way for dammit!?"  
  
He realized as always a second too late he had made a big mistake watching Kagome swell up glaring daggers at him "Osuwari!!!"  
  
His face slammed down on the same loose board that had made him fall onto Kagome lifting up the opposite end of the wooden floorboard. Kagome actually had to dodge out of the way as it flew right at her.  
  
Finally once the dust settled Inu-Yasha managed to lift himself from the splintery crater his face had created. He was just about to jump up and give Kagome a piece of his mind when her high shrill made him stop.  
  
"Inu-Yasha! Look!"  
  
There was something under the wooden floor.  
  
Someone was crying. She could hear them, a high voice, like a child's. She turned and saw nothing but darkness. The child kept crying though, and he was breaking her heart. She moved towards the sound of his voice. A familiar field with white flowers blossoming became enlightened suddenly. A few yards away from where she stood there were two children. The small pink kimono with a purple apron gave her away. It was herself. She looked around six. Beside her was a boy, Shinosuke?  
  
The boy was looking out to the sky intently watching the clouds overhead, Sango's smaller self was busy picking flowers. Neither said anything and it seemed like none of them was crying. Yet she could still hear the very faint eco of the child's cry, though almost imperceptible it was there. However the children in front of her were simply sitting in silence. Everything was still and only as the boy turned his head down did Sango's eyes widened suddenly.  
  
Miroku? She would recognize him anywhere. It wasn't as if he had grown much out of the boyish face anyway. It was part of his charm. She couldn't help but smile, seeing him looking this small and innocent was simply too much tenderness for her.  
  
Miroku turned to look at the small Sango picking flowers and watched her curiously before deciding to speak.  
  
"So what about you?" he asked.  
  
The small girl looked up to him. She then looked back at the flowers in her hand and spread them out onto her lap.  
  
"Kaa-san died." She said neutrally still sorting out her flowers "Tou- san is going to die because of Kohaku."  
  
"Who's Kohaku?" interrupted Miroku  
  
"He's my brother." Said Sango selecting a large pretty flower from the bunch "He won't know who I am because he'll be possessed. I think he's gonna try to kill me too."  
  
Sango watched from a few feet away not believed what her younger self was saying, better yet, how she was saying it. The faint cry in the back round went up a pitch sounding like a small girl's.  
  
"I'll be sad..." she finished  
  
Miroku looked over to her moving his mouth curiously from one side to the other.  
  
"And you?" asked the small girl innocently finally looking up to face him.  
  
He raised his small eyes brows. "Me? Oh, well... I never met kaa-san. Tou-san told me she gave me her life, I think..." he said gazing back at the sky  
  
"Tou-san is gonna die because of a curse in his hand. And when he does, I'll be left with it." He said looking down at his right hand "See?"  
  
He showed Sango his small out stretched hand. It was perfectly normal with no hole or armguard. Sango and her younger self watched, the small hand with curiosity and Sango from a few feet back clapped a hand over her mouth when a deep puncture appeared in the middle. She watched it grow gleaming red along the outline in a gesture that seemed to be burning away the skin. The cry in the back round deepened back to the boy's voice.  
  
Miroku and her younger self however seemed not at all appalled by this as they both watched the kazaana grow in the boy's hand. Little Sango looked up to him  
  
"Does it hurt?" she asked quietly  
  
Miroku still gazing down at his hand nodded. "A lot. Almost everyday. And it's gonna kill me someday."  
  
The small girl leaned over to get a better look at him forgetting about the flowers in her lap. "Are you scared?"  
  
The boy nodded again "A lot."  
  
"Me too..."  
  
He looked at her tilting his head in surprise "Why?"  
  
"I don't want you to die."  
  
"But I have to."  
  
"Why?"  
  
Miroku shrugged. Sango looked at him suddenly pouting "But if you go I'll be all alone."  
  
The small boy looked at her angry face for a minute then looked up at the sky placing his scarred hand over his chin apparently deep in thought. "I don't wanna go either... it's pretty here and you're nice."  
  
Sango's pout was reduced to her mouth, as she pressed it together slightly before looking back at the boy. "You're nice too. But I'd get really mad at you if you left me here all alone like Tou-san and Kohaku. And everyone else."  
  
Sango still watching from a few feet away finally saw the girl have some shred of negative emotion as tears filled her big eyes. Miroku looked down at her curiously.  
  
"Don't cry."  
  
She couldn't help it. She watched as her younger self spilled out her tears and unwillingly she did as well. What surprised her though was when Miroku stretched his right arm to her cheek. He stopped however inches from her face looking to his kazaana. With a guilty face he retracted his arm quickly and placed it behind his back.  
  
"Sorry." He murmured  
  
The little girl looked up to him sadly and somewhat disappointed. Miroku looked down with guilty eyes to the ground.  
  
"Why won't you touch me?" said her small self angrily  
  
Miroku still with his right hand behind his back didn't have the courage to look up even as the girl lifted herself up angrily from the grass spilling all her flowers.  
  
"I'll break you..." he said finally  
  
This surprised Sango and her younger self alike.  
  
"I guess I better go ne? Before I do something that'll hurt you..." he said also getting up and walking away in the opposite direction.  
  
Sango watched the children, shocked. Luckily for her, her younger self recovered much faster than she did. The little girl ran up angrily to him and promptly kicked him in the shin.  
  
"Ow!" Miroku bent over clutching his injured leg "What did you do that for?" he demanded  
  
The small girl looked up to him scowling. Even at this age he was somewhat taller than she was. "I don't care if I break..."  
  
Miroku looked down uncertainly at her still clutching his leg.  
  
"As long as it's you who holds the pieces." She and her younger self finished in unison.  
  
There was no doubt about it, she was this little girl. This was her life but without the excuses and complications of grown ups. Simple and strait forward.  
  
Miroku shook his head. For a second Sango thought he was going to do something stupid like try and leave again, but to her surprise he put his small arms around her and pulled her into a hug. What shocked her was the sensation of strong arms do the same to her. Before she had a chance to look up to see who it was, dark robes where pushed against her as his arms held her tightly.  
  
His scent. A midnight breeze carrying the smell of a deep forest. She managed to lift her chin over his shoulder arching her neck to reach. It was dark again. They were no longer in the field, but in a dark room that felt melancholic. Shapes appeared behind him. Blurry human shapes, the first one cleared out against the darkness as it moved away. Her mother looked over to her smiling sadly lifting a hand and sending her a kiss before she was swallowed by the darkness.  
  
"Okaa-san..." Sango whispered at nothing  
  
Her father followed closely behind not looking up to Sango with a look of guilt on his face. From behind Miroku, Sango out stretched her arm pleading her father to return. Once he disappeared the final shape cleared and began retreating as well.  
  
"Kohaku!" she called out feeling Miroku tighten his grip on her  
  
Her brother looked back at her just as sad as she felt before darkness covered him as well. She was glad she was being held in an embrace as she clutched his robes tightly, resting her head on his shoulder. A glimmer of light made her look up and find another blurry figure.  
  
Her eyes widened as he cleared out. Miroku? But he was. She pushed herself out of the embrace of the man that was holding her to find Shinosuke staring down sadly and longingly at her. She shook her head turning back to Miroku. His Shakujo dropped to the floor as he clutched his right hand. She watched as he was slowly fading into the dark and ran past Shinosuke. No. HE couldn't leave her.  
  
Miroku looked up to her, his face twisted in pain. His eyes saddened as he watched her running up to him. He stretched out his left hand as if trying to reach her as well, but it was covered in blood, a vertical slash down his entire palm. Sango's stomach jumped in fear. She ran harder, but he only seemed to get further away.  
  
No, she wouldn't loose him. Not him, no! she watched as wisps of black air began to whirl around him coming from his right hand, meanwhile his left hand didn't seem to stop bleeding.  
  
"You promised!" she called out to him  
  
"Sango!" He called desperately to her  
  
"Iya!" she took in a sharp breath of air as her eyes burst open.  
  
She looked around the dark room blinking constantly to try and wake herself up completely. Small white dots where flashing in front of her eyes. Leaning on her hand she sat up over her futon taking a trembling hand to her agitated chest. A horrible sinking feeling came to her as she remembered the dream. An awful feeling of emptiness and fear.  
  
She shook her head and rubbed her eyes vigorously. It was just a dream. A nightmare. She had had nightmares before. They weren't real. Repeating this constantly she waited until her breathing evened out, trying to ignore the lingering feeling of fear in her stomach.  
  
She looked around the room. It was still dark. And... she looked surprised at the empty futon beside her. Kagome was still not back? Another feeling of worry came to her, luckily it didn't last too long because 3 seconds later the door slid open. Sango held her guard and relaxed when she made out the familiar silhouette of her friend.  
  
"Kagome-chan?" Sango asked, her eyes barely adjusting to the light.  
  
"Sango..." she answered somewhat breathlessly.  
  
Getting a better look at her friend she noticed Kagome was soaked from head to toe. Making her kimono cling to her skin and her hair fall down in clumps, still dripping with rain water.  
  
"What happened? Where's Inu-Yasha? Are you ok?"  
  
Kagome entered the room waving her hand nodding a bit frustrated as she managed to get her breath back.  
  
"We... found it!" she answered finally.  
  
Sango looked up to her friend perplexed as she slipped on her kimono tying it loosely with a waistband. After today Sango knew why she didn't wear obi's too often.  
  
"Found it?" Sango asked again  
  
Kagome nodded waving around a piece of paper "There were... more scripts under the old floor... It was... mostly flooded but... we found the way to save him!" she said excitedly  
  
Sango looked at the piece of paper in her friend's hand, searching absentmindedly for her hair tie.  
  
"Save Shinosuke?" asked Sango trying to follow her friend.  
  
Kagome shook her head. "Miroku already knew how to do that... we found a way to do the procedure so that he could get saved as well!" she said excitedly.  
  
Sango's brow furrowed halfway through the process of tying her hair. "But he alre..." she was about to speak when it hit her. Kagome and Inu- Yasha had just come back with this information? But Inu-Yasha had been there when Miroku had...  
  
Kagome looked up at Sango watching her eyes widen and her face pale, she was just about to ask if she was all right before suddenly Sango grabbed the paper in Kagome's hand and rushed out the door.  
  
"Sango-chan?" called Kagome to her back  
  
Sango ran down the hallway to Inu-Yasha's room to find him staring at two empty futons. He turned to look at her.  
  
"The bouzu did it anyway didn't he?" asked Inu-Yasha  
  
She didn't stay to reply, but rushed back to Shinosuke's room throwing the door open. He was still sleeping peacefully over his futon with nobody else in the room.  
  
"Sango-chan?!" she heard Kagome yell as she rushed down the hall.  
  
She didn't care. Inu-Yasha stepped out of the room and she dodged just in time to throw him off balance.  
  
"Oi! Watch it!" he called.  
  
She heard nothing running down the halls, and hopping off the porch. Not looking back after passing the doors of the inn.  
  
She ran as fast as her legs could carry her, lifting the kimono up to her thighs so that it didn't get in the way. Through the rain and mud, she heard soft thunder over head and saw an occasional explosion of light in the sky. She had a pretty good idea of where to look but it was so far away,  
  
That Stupid monk! How could he do something like this? He had looked her in the face and lied! Why? What for? Her lungs burned and her legs were starting to ache, she paid no heed to either of them. The rain came down over her hair and clothes, this would probably ruin her kimono.  
  
Yet thoughts as insignificant didn't stop her from running down the streets, barefoot to say the least. She had never been this angry at him. The groping, going off to flirt with other girls, giving her mixed signals to everything she did, none of that compared to the anger and frustration that she was feeling now.  
  
"Ahou." she hissed  
  
Feeling a burning sensation in her palm as she clenched it too tightly, she ran through the bitter night rain, droplets of cool liquid mingling with her tears of anger.  
  
¬¬ for those of you who care, 'Ahou' means idiot, it's a little more severe than just baka so. needles to say... she's pissedSorry for the ridiculously looong dream sequence that didn't make much sense, and don't ask why I put it in there because. I have no clue, it just came to me in a dream! Ja! (public throws fruits at the horrible pun) ¬¬ is it really a pun? Does it qualify as one? ¬¬ does anyone care? --' 


	10. Search of Love

K, no more school til august, free at last but there is the little I'm-in- the-middle-of-moving-and-have-no-telephone problem, but I intent to keep my promise, by the end of june I'll post the last chapter jiji  
  
Search of Love   
  
Twelve years. It was impossible that he had learned nothing in that time. More than half of his life had to be worth something ne? Even though some lessons were quite boring, they all ended up being useful for something. Besides, both Mushin and his father used to say he was not to be an ordinary person; going on and on about how his spiritual powers had to be canalized in the right way and what not.  
  
Back then he couldn't have cared less, now however he had grown; in ways he never thought possible. Not only had he learned by the tedious lessons of his youth, but by his own seven years of experience and practice. It was only logical that if he put his mind to it, he would be able to do something. After all, spiritual techniques and knowledge of any kind had all been acquired by someone who at one point had no scripts or predecessors to teach them. If others could come up with skills and cures, what made him any different?  
  
He had after all made a promise to someone he cared deeply for. There had only been one time he had broken one of his promises, and he had regretted it deeply. He wasn't about to do it again if he could help it, if not for his sake, for Sango's.  
  
She couldn't see past where her arms stretched forward and unwillingly she had to slow her pace in fear that she might bump into a wall or anything of that sort. The adrenaline was still rushing freely through her blood making the pain of sharp rocks against her bare feet imperceptible. It had been useless to try and run with a kimono so she had a good grip on the ankle cuff, keeping the cloth just over her knees. In her left hand clutched tightly was the ragged old piece of paper Kagome had claimed would save Miroku's life. Trying her best to keep it dry she had stuffed it all in her fist. After all it didn't matter if it was a bit crinkled as long as it could be read.  
  
Her footsteps echoed along the stoned street crashing over small amounts of rain water. She knew where she was going, she was almost certain he was there. Her sense of orientation had always been excellent and for that she was grateful. Even though she had only seen 'it' on their way into this town, she knew what streets to take to get there. The only problem was that it wasn't a very short distance.  
  
She thought of Kirara and how stupid it was to rush out of the inn in her condition. But there was no sense in regretting things now. Her lungs were already burning and it was not helping that she inhale large amounts of cold wet air. The muscles in her legs had begun to protest and with every step she took she felt another sharp rock dig into the tender flesh of her feet. Mud was spattered all over her legs and her kimono was soaked clinging tightly to her like a second skin. Goosebumps made their way up her arms and down her torso as the rain seemed to get colder by each passing minute.  
  
None of this however seemed to matter. Thoughts that seemed out of place kept running through her head as she blinked rapidly trying to keep out the rain water. The image of Miroku in her dream looking sideways at her innocently seemed to be carved into her mind. And even knowing it wasn't real she couldn't stop thinking about it. There were other images as well. Mostly memories.  
  
When they had first met, she listened intently as Miroku scolded Inu- Yasha for trying to hurry her recovery. The first time he had tried to grope her setting his hands over her legs. When he had intended to give her 'Mouth to Mouth'. The first time he had called her name in a battle. How his robes brushed against her whenever they rode Kirara. When he had apologized for not asking her his ridiculous question. When he had taken her hand after the jackal youkai incident. The first time he saved her regardless as to what could happen to him.  
  
Her fist clenched. The first time she had tended to a wound 'caused' by her, she had felt a horrible empty feeling of guilt. This feeling having plagued her for days, she had made a promise to herself to be more careful in battle so that he would never have to get hurt on her account again.  
  
Her eyes invisible under her cascading bangs, she gave a bitter smile keeping up her pace. How naïve. Pushing aside her train of thoughts she stopped abruptly in front of the large structure. She was never known to be a calm calculating person. On the contrary she had gotten into a lot of trouble because of her explosive behavior. Now, as her body still begged her for oxygen, her lungs expanding and contracting in her chest rapidly, it had happened again. But she had made it, time was precious.  
  
Jogging forward she looked up at the huge doors surrounded by a protective wall. As Miroku had once told her, a Temple never shuts it's doors to anyone. She stepped through into a beautiful garden. Not able to appreciate it all that much in the dark and with the sky falling over her, but she felt instant relief as her feet passed from the rough stoned path to the cool flooded grass of the temple.  
  
She stepped up rapidly to a large structure in the middle. Behind it still within the boundaries of the Shrine she could make out two other buildings, smaller than the central structure. Licking her lips to clear them from rain water she looked both ways, now where was he?  
  
Walking up cautiously to the structure in the centre she decided the only way to find out was checking. Quickening her pace she threw open the doors to be received by the silence of the large, apparently empty structure. She couldn't help but give a surprised gasp as looking closer she saw it was not empty at all.  
  
Never had she seen so many scripts or books in her life. In the walls there were shelves loaded with both of these, all around the hollow wooden structure. The water dripping off her hands and drenched kimono echoed in the large room as she took a step inside. Her reading skills were very poor due to the fact that her mother had been the one to teach her, when she passed away there had been no one left to continue her tutoring, but it caused her a great deal of curiosity thinking of everything that could be written here.  
  
She scanned the room with here eyes. No one was here. About five candles that had burned out over themselves were in various locations around the room, near the end to the right there was a wooden floor board out of place and a round hole with splinters surrounding it. Her mind snapped back to Miroku. He wasn't here so what was the point of staying?  
  
Turning back she exited the large room to the rain pounding over her ears once more. She turned to her left and headed for the small shrine behind the large library. Climbing the three wooden stairs she flung open the doors to find nothing. There wasn't much to this small wooden structure. Besides the fact that it had a small alter at the very end, it looked a lot like the small huts the found occasionally in the woods. Empty. That only left one.  
  
Anticipating the sight of Miroku she jumped to the muddy floor and ran across the small field over to the last small shrine. A spark of fear suddenly entered her heart wondering what she would do if she didn't find him there, or if something had happened to him. Pushing aside the disturbing thoughts she closed her eyes tightly shaking her head and ran right into something very hard.  
  
Dazed she fell back over the muddy grass, her head spinning. Blinking constantly she tried to focus her vision as well as keep the rain out. What had happened? It felt like she had collided with a wall and the shrine was still about a yard away. Ignoring the throbbing of her head she got up and cautiously walked over, for safety she let her kimono fall to her ankles and stretched her arm out ahead of her.  
  
Taking no more than two steps her hand met with something. A soft blue spark had come out of thin air as she felt the solid structure under her palm. She pulled away feeling the small discharge of energy. It came to her as she let out a small gasp. Not this, not right now. She pounded her fist over the invisible barrier only to have it bounce back at her leaving the field with that same blue electricity.  
  
Her brows furrowed as she clenched her fists and tried again. "Miroku!"  
  
His eyes shot open breaking completely his concentration. He turned to where he thought he had heard his name, ears straining to hear something apart from the patter of rain over the ceiling. Had he imagined it? After all it had been a very faint cry and the rain falling hard over the little wooden temple made a considerate noise. Not to mention the eternal drip of the leaks in the ceiling. Had her voice just been a figment of his imagination? He wanted to see her badly, it was very possible that his mind was just trying to find a way to satisfy him.  
  
He let out a soft moan as a dark hue came to his cheeks. He had lost concentration. Regretting having had imagined such a thing, he shut his eyes again assuming his original position. It hadn't been smart to get distracted, who knew what would happen to him if he did it again. Pushing aside his thoughts he went back to his work.  
  
It was impossible anyway, there was no way she would call out to him. At least not by his name.  
  
She swallowed hard. Telling her mind to calm down, he was here, it was proven by this barrier, but why didn't he answer? Had he heard? Did he choose to ignore her? Was he hurt or...?  
  
She debated on what she should do now. The simplest thing would be to call out to him again. Though she had not intended to call him by name, it was another one of those moments where her body acted regardless to what reason told her. Still, she had a feeling that it would have the same outcome. Silence. What good would that do? It would only make her worry more.  
  
There had to be a way in here but, she walked around the invisible dome to the front of the shrine, his barriers were strong. She knew this for a fact. The only thing she could think of was waiting until it came down on it's own but that could take hours and would mean that either he took it down by will, or that he was...  
  
She swallowed hard feeling dizzy. His Shakujo stood incrusted in the dirt directly in front of the wooden stairs to the door giving off a soft blue hue. Though his barrier guaranteed her that he was alive it didn't say anything as to how he was. Being as it was, it would hold out strong until the end when it would suddenly evaporate. It told her nothing as to what state he was in.  
  
Her physical pain and exhaustion catching up to her finally, she let herself drop down over her legs. Again she set cautious fingers over the barrier giving off what looked like soft blue lightning.  
  
Wait, what was she doing? She had his salvation in her left hand. Like hell he would let her in! Getting up with a determined face she was about to give him a piece of her mind when a yielding memory rushed across her mind.  
  
"Nani?" she asked the monk as he suddenly took her wrist in his hand.  
  
"Well you broke the other one I gave you ne? I should have known you'd need more protection, what with you being so impulsive and all."  
  
"I'm not impulsive!" she said offended, watching him slip a white beaded rosary over her right hand just right for her wrist.  
  
It had been a few days since the jackal youkai incident. And yes it was true the bracelet had snapped in the battle, but it hadn't been her fault. Not completely at least.  
  
"Oh, oh you're right I'm so sorry for implying such a thing! Really I don't know what came over me..." he grinned.  
  
Sango looked up from the shiny beads to scowl at him. He smiled "Consider it as a gift then... I hope you like it."  
  
He smiled again before heading out the little shack joining up with Kagome and Inu-Yasha. She blinked at the door. He had made it for her, she knew it.  
  
Sango remembered when Kagome had told her to wear her new kimono that very morning. Agreeing shyly, she had slipped out of her normal pink yukata and something had dropped from a hidden pouch. It was a small white seashell. Knowing well what was in it she picked it up just as Kagome and Shippou looked down at it curiously, hastily putting it away in her new kimono.  
  
Luck had been with her. She rummaged inside her sleeve feeling the hard structure of the shell. And pulled it out quickly, clicking it open. A bit of water had leaked through the shell giving the white beads a glossy coat of water. She took them out of their container and quickly placed them over her left wrist, only hoping this would work. He said they were for protection, she didn't know if they would help her cross a barrier, especially his.  
  
Nervously she took her hand up to the barrier, still fisted clutching the paper. Her knuckles touched the barrier and she felt the surge of energy run throughout her hand. But she pushed. She took in a sharp breath as pain invaded her entire arm, but her hand was on the other side of the barrier. Eyes wide with mild surprise she gulped and took in a deep breath, she could get in, but her arm was becoming numb. It was her guess that passing her whole body would hurt a bit more.  
  
Pressing her lips together she shut her eyes and pushed herself through the barrier. Biting her lip she withheld her scream and it felt like all of her muscles seemed to want to contract at once. It felt like having a corporeal cramp. Once through, she swayed for balance breathing hard after having experienced such a thing. Her whole body felt twitchy now. She almost forgot the fact that she was in.  
  
Swallowing down her pain she looked up to the small cabin and ran up the stairs skipping the first two. The door cracked as she flung it open and entered, suddenly stopping and almost falling over herself.  
  
There was a peculiar silence as both looked over to each other with similar expressions. It seemed to last forever, the loudest noise came from the soft thumping of small droplets falling from Sango's kimono over the old wooden floor. The swelling ceiling creaked once or twice in their moment of silence. Both eyes scanned one another. Sango barely had time to realize he had nothing over his chest. His violet cloth lay folded neatly beside him, and his black yukata was pulled down to where the waistband was. He was sitting cross legged in front of the small alter at the very end with his hands intertwined over his lap. Only his index and thumb were extended making contact with each other pointing upward.  
  
Miroku looked at the girl in front of him, who was still panting lightly. She was soaked, dirty and exhausted, yet she looked beautiful. The wet silk over her body barely covered anything. Only the small rivers of air under it gave away the secret of her second skin. Red had become maroon and the white petals of sakura blossoms were no longer a clean metallic white but rather a dull trans-lucid. Not to mention that it looked rather ruffled around her legs. With blotches of mud going from her bare feet to her thighs. Her hair was still scurrying with water as it stuck to anything it came upon, forming ebony rivers on her face, neck and shoulders.  
  
So much was going on in their heads but noting seemed to come out of their mouths. Sango was the first to break out of the trance. No longer able to hold in what her mind told her so strongly to do. Confirm he was here. Her brows dropped to sad eyes as she stumbled forward almost tripping over her own feet. Falling in his lap she set her arms over his neck and pushed herself against him.  
  
He shivered. Not knowing if it was her wet kimono over his warm flesh or the fact that he could feel her breath over his back and her own goose bumps against his skin. He longed to hold her, to return such a deep embrace. But as much as he wanted to, the reason he couldn't acted up seconds later.  
  
"Ah!"  
  
Sango tensed at his call of pain and quickly pushed herself away looking up to his eyes already wanting to ask the question. He cursed himself for loosing concentration again and looked down to her with half closed eyes.  
  
"What's wr--"  
  
"You shouldn't have come." He interrupted wincing again  
  
Her gasp was caught in the back of her throat as she looked up to him with slightly wide eyes. Her brows dropped again and feeling shame arise in her stomach, but suddenly stopped. She broke eye contact with him and looked down to her left hand where the paper was still crumpled in it. Unconsciously he also looked down and watched as she opened her fingers slowly, revealing a very crumpled piece of paper. Rather curios he looked up again to see her looking down loathingly at the paper.  
  
She had remembered. Her brain had come out of its wave of relief after seeing him and now everything had come back. Why he was here in the first place, her strange dream, Kagome's return with his cure, running through the rain preoccupied and scared, to be received by a 'You shouldn't have come'?!  
  
Jaw clenched tightly she turned up to him with fury in her eyes, watching him jump back a bit. She threw the ball of paper in his lap and just as he was about to look down to it her other hand connected with his cheek.  
  
It hurt, she didn't know why so much though. She should be used to it by now. This time however she had the impression that it had hurt her a lot more than it did him.  
  
Shocked, he could do nothing but stare emptily to where his face had been pushed. He wondered what had just happened before he heard her harsh voice.  
  
"Is that all... you have to say to me?"  
  
Blinking a few times he tried to ignore the stinging in his cheek, understand what had just happened, and keep up his ritual as he turned back to her with question in his eyes.  
  
"You shouldn't have come?!" she asked again a little louder  
  
He just didn't like her being so angry, especially at him. But he couldn't think of anything to say.  
  
"Not going to tell me that you lied? Or apologize for having made me worry beyond myself? Or at least tell me why the hell you pulled all this mess off?!" she slammed her hand against the floor  
  
He had seen Sango angry before, and frustrated, but never with this feeling. It unnerved him and suddenly made him feel very guilty. So she had found out that he had lied about his cure. And she was in this state because of him. The guilt packed on.  
  
Sango let out an exasperated sigh. "There's your damn cure. Be lucky you have such good friends that stick by you no matter how stupid your actions get."  
  
He looked down at the paper in his lap then back up at Sango who was apparently still trying to get herself under control. She looked up from her fists to him with a softer expression, he couldn't be sure if what he saw roll down her cheeks were tears or lingering rain water from her bangs.  
  
"Since I'm not welcome here, I'll leave now..."  
  
Getting up clumsily she turned towards the door.  
  
"Iya." He found himself saying  
  
She turned slowly to face him again. "Why...?" she asked softly  
  
He lowered his gaze thinking quickly of a reason why he said that "It's still raining, you could--" he stopped as looking up to her again he saw she was shaking her head.  
  
"Why did you do this?" she asked again.  
  
Having understood her original question he didn't dare look away from her now. But it was barely the time to talk about these things. His face became neutral.  
  
"You really don't know?"  
  
Sango's face twisted with question, after that there was silence in the small shrine again before she finally dared to speak.  
  
"Do you think my happiness would come of your death?" he squirmed under her intense gaze and only relaxed when her eyes traveled down to her lap as she sat down once again in front of him.  
  
"You would die for me?" she asked softly  
  
Noticing the soft tinge of pink on her cheeks he stood mesmerized by her expectant expression for as long as he dare.  
  
"Yes..."  
  
Sango swallowed and looked up at him momentarily, then moved her hand over both of his. He couldn't help but look down at their contact, not fully understanding what she wanted from him. Shifting his gaze he found her also staring at their hands. She looked up to him meekly with an expression he had never seen before.  
  
"Would you live for me?" she asked in a hushed tone  
  
She was cold. Small chilly fingers griped his hands lovingly as she said this. And all he could do was look back at her with an uncertain gaze.  
  
The emotion of her words sunk in, creating a rare feeling of warmth that spread from his chest to his whole body, and he couldn't help but smile softly at the girl before him.  
  
"Yes..."  
  
keep up the reviews please! 


	11. By Your Side

This one's bloody! I warn you!!  
  
By Your Side   
  
A slight blush came to Sango's face as he whispered that one word. It was as if her mind suddenly reminded her who was in front of her smiling fondly and the question she had just asked him. If he were willing to live or die for her? Her face went from light pink to deep cherry. Finding she couldn't keep looking into his kind eyes she dropped her gaze, horrified seeing her hands were still clutching his.  
  
Before she could get any more embarrassed, she heard his voice, cleared and less tensed. "Is it your wish that I live for you?"  
  
Her face fumed and suddenly she wasn't as cold as when she first came in, she was almost certain the water over her body was evaporating around her. What had he just said? Did she want him to live for her? She closed her eyes trying to dissipate the awkward feeling in her jumpy heart, opening them to find she was still holding his hands. Her brow twitched as she pulled them back like she had touched fire.  
  
If she were willing to look up she would see the monk with certain amusement in his eyes, watching the girl stumble for words.  
  
"Well I..." she began taking a finger to scratch her neck. She stopped with certain confidence that evaporated as soon as she looked up to him again. "Well if you recall you made a promise not too long ago. I just supposed you had intended to keep it, that's all."  
  
She gave a small nod mostly to herself for thinking up something coherent. Then looked up expectantly to him, only to find him struggling against something she could only guess.  
  
"I'm," he began with a strained voice "Trying my best..."  
  
A worried expression overcame her seeing him let out a short breath and take in another. That was the third time he had done that.  
  
"What's wrong?" she asked already leaning forward.  
  
In spite of the pain in his lower back he looked up to her with a smile. "I'm... keeping my promise..."  
  
Her brows furrowed "Nani?"  
  
Having shut his eyes he was now taking in long relaxing breaths apparently deep in concentration. She waited not so patiently for his answer. Finally his eyes opened again looking somewhat grim.  
  
"I'm sorry, about what I said to you when you first arrived. But I wasn't sure if I could do this with you here. Your lovely face is awfully distracting for me and I need a great deal of concentration to pull this off."  
  
She would be flattered later, right now there were too many questions to be asked "What do you mean? What is it you're doing Houshi-sama?"  
  
He offered her yet another smile. "Well as you clearly put it, I had a promise to keep; I would never break my word if I could help it, especially to you."  
  
She was right were she had started, shaking her head she was about to ask again when he spoke.  
  
"I decided if I did not have the written cure, I would have to make one myself." He continued glancing sideways "I would do anything to not let you down. This is, what I'm doing now..."  
  
Sango's brows furrowed "But what are you doing?"  
  
With his head he motioned behind himself. Sango looked passed him curiously and saw nothing, looking back at him expectantly.  
  
"My back. You can tell me at least if I'm making any progress." He explained  
  
Rather curious as to what the monk was doing, and a bit edgy after noticing the lingering metallic smell of blood in the room, she lifted herself from the swollen wooden floor. Shivering as some parts of wet silk her skin hadn't been against suddenly made contact with her barely drying skin and as others she had warmed, were suddenly pulled away. Ignoring his concerned look she walked behind him. Her hand rushed to her mouth.  
  
He heard her give a loud gasp and suddenly drop to her knees behind him.  
  
"What is it?" he asked truly intrigued. He had a faint idea as to what she might see but was it something she would worry this much over?  
  
Sango didn't know what sickened her more. The sight of the many tentacle creature half way out of Miroku's body covered in his own blood or the scattered layer of deep red all over his back apparently where the small blades of the creature tried to dig in once expelled.  
  
"Houshi-sama..." she whispered not being able to look away from the horrid mass of moving bleeding tentacles. "Are you...? Doesn't this...?"  
  
"I don't think there's any other way to get this thing out of me without involving another host." He explained  
  
"But it's... it keeps cutting into your back."  
  
"Yes but it hasn't been able to get in again has it?"  
  
Sango looked his back over with worried eyes "Well no but... they're very deep and you're loosing a lot of blood."  
  
Miroku lowered his chin. "It won't take much longer, for now the superficial cuts are just a side effect and furthermore won't kill me."  
  
Sango's brows dropped. There was nothing superficial about these cuts. He had quite a bit of blood over him; it had already seeped into his black robes and was staining the floor with small drops.  
  
"How long have you been here Houshi-sama?" she asked worriedly  
  
She watched the muscles in his back tense as another tentacle of the small youkai seemed to be forcefully pushed out of his back.  
  
"About an hour." He said in a strained voice  
  
An hour with this thing cutting into him?! "Houshi-sama this is dangerous, you could bleed to death if that monster keeps sticking it's blades in you."  
  
"I told you, it'll stop only when its last tentacle is removed. Don't worry it won't be much longer."  
  
Sango's worried face turned determined "Well you don't have much longer either."  
  
Noticing the sudden change in her tone he turned his head after hearing the soft tearing of fabric and slight whistle of a metallic object cutting through the air. He found Sango holding a blade to her hand that had apparently come from her fore arm, ripping the sleeve of the delicate silk kimono.  
  
"Sango?" he asked watching her lean over his back "No keep away! What do you plan to do? If it touches your skin it could take you as it's host."  
  
"Well then... I simply won't let it..." he felt a tug at his back "Touch me." She finished  
  
With her hidden kodacchi she quickly grabbed a small tentacle of the youkai and cut clean through it taking away her hands immediately as the other tubes turned in her direction.  
  
"It doesn't have to be alive while you expel it does it?" she asked snatching another tentacle and slicing it before the others reached her.  
  
"No, but Sango this is dangerous, and there's no point to it. I'll be fine, you have no protection if it somehow manages to get a hold of you." He said watching what he could over his shoulder.  
  
"Don't you start worrying about me now. You've got no--" she paused slicing away another member "right." She finished tossing it to a group where another two lay still wiggling occasionally.  
  
"No right?" asked Miroku  
  
"That's correct." said Sango not taking her eyes off her task. "Not after the way you had me worried out of my mind pulling off this stunt."  
  
Miroku gave a deep sigh changing his worried face to a regretful one for a second "I'm sorry, I suppose I should have been more considerate." he paused wondering if he should mention what he had been about to say.  
  
"But that kiss was... a bit off-putting."  
  
He chose the wrong time to say this just as she was slicing through another tentacle. She hesitated a moment too long and was brought back to reality the second a thin tentacle cut into her left hand. She pulled back quickly slicing with a certain fear as the other small tubes began to make their way to her hand, fortunately she pulled back fast enough only for a second to achieve a skin deep cut.  
  
"Sango? Daijoubu?" asked Miroku noticing the strain and hesitation in her acts.  
  
Setting down her kodacchi she placed two fingers over the slender tentacle still trying to insert itself into her bloodstream even detached from the rest of its body. Winching as the thing came out bloody she felt it resist and cut deeper onto the path it had already made for itself under the skin of her hand. Frowning she looked at the tiny worm grimly once it was out of her hand and threw it with the rest feeling blood pump from the wound in her hand.  
  
She shook it quickly trying to shake off the pain and then wiped it roughly on the fabric of her kimono, barely staining it as it was almost the same color of her blood.  
  
"Sango?" he asked again  
  
Her mind snapped back to the small shrine she was in, having remembered why she had gotten distracted enough to let that happen to her.  
  
"How do you know about that?" she asked, her voice a little colder than she intended.  
  
He looked back at her with shameful eyes and decided it was better if he looked away, staring at the wall directly in front of him, where the door stood barely ajar giving him a glimpse of the dark humid night.  
  
"I had gone to look for you wanting us to discuss the situation, with Shinosuke-san. I needed to know how you felt about the transfer. I honestly didn't have any intentions of walking in on you or eavesdropping." He explained  
  
"How I felt about the transfer...? What do you mean, if I wanted you to do it or not?" she asked trying to control the frustration she was feeling.  
  
"Yes. I suppose... I wanted an easy way out of having to make such a decision."  
  
Her fist clenched as her suspects to his 'discussion' were confirmed.  
  
"You wanted me to choose who would live and die, you or my best friend, for you?" she asked  
  
"I realized it was unfair but you have to understand I was frightened myself. I suppose I was selfish not to think of how that would affect you, but you also have to know that your word in this would have been taken as the most important."  
  
"Why?" she asked loudly  
  
"Because Shinosuke and I live for the same reason." He said quietly  
  
Her heart suddenly felt as if it were being pushed in every direction at once. She had to be hearing him wrong.  
  
"If you would have told us with true honesty that you wished for Shinosuke to live, we both would have accepted. And if you told us you wanted me to survive, again we would see to it that you obtained what you wanted to be as happy as possible. Now of course I realize a decision like this would have troubled you greatly, and the last thing I wanted to do was force you to give me an answer. I simply wanted to talk to you about my position and hope to get a hint as to what I should do."  
  
Sango stared at the floor. She wasn't sure what to do to convince herself that this was dream. It had to be, what she was hearing couldn't possibly true. If so now would be a good time to wake up, at least to break the rather uncomfortable silence. Miroku spoke again even softer than before.  
  
"I suppose the first thing that passed through my mind when I saw you with Shinosuke was that you had already made your decision. The right one in my opinion, as I can not give you half of what he can. And at least it left out the awkward conversation with you." He smiled bitterly.  
  
Sango looked up to him sheepishly, anger gone and somehow suddenly feeling a bit guilty. She could understand in a way why he had acted the way he did. But that still didn't make his conclusions true or any less stupid.  
  
"Houshi-sama... what you saw... was Shinosuke's emotions get the best of him. He did what he did out of impulse. And understood the magnitude of what he had done until he pulled away. Mostly because, I didn't respond the way he had hoped."  
  
He looked down grimly at his hands holding in a fake smile. He still didn't want to hear this.  
  
"He knew from the beginning my heart, belonged to...... another person." She paused feeling her face heat up. "So, what you saw, was nothing more than a small mistake on his behalf. And it was somewhat unreasonable to base a decision as important as the one you had to make on it. I suppose I have to admit that talking to me would have been better. I'm sorry."  
  
His eyes turned to her direction. "Why?"  
  
This caught her by surprise. She had said sorry... well because she had judged him for being selfish without knowing his side of the story, right? Or was it because of the...?  
  
"Nandemonai." She said quietly going back to her work.  
  
Miroku looked over his shoulder unable to see but the silhouette of her left shoulder occupied with what ever it was she was doing to the creature in his back. He certainly hadn't missed that long pause when she mentioned her heart was taken. He kept trying to push down the hope that had erupted inside saying it could be anyone she was talking about. Even so he couldn't help but smile as he decided to keep quiet after a relative silence finally turning back to the door. Neither of them spoke for a long while.  
  
Sango was almost done with the parasite in his back, there were two tentacles to go and he seemed to have less than three still in his back. She sighed to herself; hopefully all this would end soon. She cut the last tentacle with a clean slice and tossed it to the others letting out a tired breath.  
  
Another looked like it was about to be pushed out of Miroku's back. While she waited she flicked the sword rapidly hoping to get some of the blood off it, surveying her hands she found they were also covered with the thick liquid. Getting a better look however she found the wound made by the tentacle that had accidentally cut into her hand was still bleeding. She shook it roughly and then held it up above her shoulder hoping in some way that could help.  
  
"Are you all right?" his voice called  
  
She looked up to find him turning to see what she was doing and was now looking at her left hand with concern.  
  
"Daijoubu, it's just a cut." She said  
  
He tensed a bit as the tentacle she had been waiting for was expelled roughly. Catching hold of it before it so much had a chance to wiggle she sliced neatly through it, leaving a bleeding stump. Was this thing still alive? Setting down her kodacchi she couldn't stop the sneeze that was suddenly in her nose.  
  
Miroku looked back at her hearing her sneeze three times in a row. And then sniffle lightly. He remembered now how she had arrived. Drenched to the bone. It had been a while but her clothes were probably still very damp, and the temperature of the room wasn't helping. If she got sick it would be entirely his fault.  
  
"Sango." He called  
  
"Nani?" she asked looking over his shoulder  
  
"Are you feeling all right?"  
  
Sango made a small noise of confusion and then understood. "Oh, no, I'm fine Houshi-sama. I just got a chill that's all." She smiled  
  
He looked at her far from convinced. She couldn't help but smile sheepishly, wanting to call out 'What?' with those eyes he was giving her. His back was covered in blood, and from what she could tell he was in considerate pain and here he was worrying that she could get a cold?  
  
"Sango."  
  
She looked up to find he was no longer looking back at her but to his bottom right. Following his gaze she came upon his violet cloth folded neatly beside him. Her face felt hot.  
  
"Take it." He spoke  
  
Sango's mouth shrunk as her blush deepened. Dammit he had to be all sweet and what not. She turned to look down at his back noticing another tentacle had been pushed out, leaving only one in his back. She took her kodacchi and sliced it off trying her best to pretend he hadn't said anything.  
  
"You only have one left Houshi-sama, this last one and you're finished." She told him  
  
"It'll keep you warm at least, and cover you a bit more than your kimono." He added with a smile.  
  
Her eyes widened in mild surprise and if it were possible she turned a deeper shade of red. Absentmindedly she looked down at herself to find he couldn't be more correct. First, she was still cold, goose bumps were still all over her body, and second, you could clearly tell she was cold. Her arms made their way over her chest quickly and she watched as he looked back at her with amusement and satisfaction.  
  
She grit her teeth, as long as he didn't have that hentai smile of his... she thought.  
  
"Just take the cloth Sango." He said half laughing  
  
Pouting she stretched her arm over to the cloth beside him leaving the other protectively over her torso to cover as much of it as she could. Pulling it back towards her she took it in both hands and flipped it over her back.  
  
Slowly pulling it across her shoulders she inhaled deeply letting his scent come over her. A sense of calm warmth overcame her senses as she pulled herself deeper into 'him'.  
  
She snapped out of it a bit embarrassed as she heard him give a muffled groan. Looking down at his back, all she saw was something that looked like a black snake jump out at her and a blinding blue light. Trying to untangle herself from his cloth she placed her hands in front of her a second too late feeling a sharp pain in her chest. Before she could make sense of anything, something very large hit her across the back winding her.  
  
Feeling a nauseating wave of pain and a light push in his back he saw the flash of light behind him and turned quickly. Sango flew against the wall of the shrine with great force as something black squirmed against her chest. 'No!' his mind screamed  
  
"Sango!"  
  
Springing from his position on the floor he intended to go to her, angry at himself for not remembering or warning her. He didn't however take more than two steps turning her way before another wave of pain made everything blurry. His body didn't respond and his senses disappeared, making it nearly impossible to feel the hard crash of his body against the floor. The pain was consuming and his vision went black a second before his eyes closed.  
  
Trying hard to concentrate on something other than the pressure in her chest she cleared her thoughts opening her eyes against the pain. She had been pushed against the wall and her hand against her chest still clutched something tightly that was burning and fighting against it. Looking down she saw what seemed to be the last tentacle of the creature, still attached to the ball of bloody stumps she had cut off.  
  
This last one however was very different from the rest. Hollow, slender and long just the same, but the small scalpel at the end was not flat and triangular like the rest. It had the shape of cone covered with many other small peaks all around the diameter where it met the hollow tube. She couldn't help but scream as it inserted itself deeper into her chest trying desperately and rapidly to get good depth. Winching she squeezed the ball of stumps even tighter with both hands and pulled hard before half the cone had entered her skin.  
  
Her kodacchi not far, she out stretched her injured hand and took it, slicing the remaining tentacle in half. When it still wiggled she drew down her blade over and over until there were more than six pieces of it gushing blood over the humid wooden floor. She felt heat rush up to her hand as she saw the last evidenced of movement from the parasite. A bit paranoid she looked at the bloody stump beside the tiny massacre and sliced it in half, regretting it a second later as thick blackened blood oozed from the ball making the layers of skin collapse against each other.  
  
She swallowed hard, the smell of blood making her nauseas already. Still panting and feeling pain against her chest she felt a certain wave of relief wash over her when nothing moved anymore. It was over.  
  
Finally, this thing that had caused her so much pain, had died at her hand. Giving the best smile she could with her hands still shaking over her bosom she looked up at Miroku expecting to see him wearing a similar expression.  
  
She gasped.  
  
"Miroku!"  
  
Don't freak out on me people!! This is far from over, and even though you should know I'm a sadistic little girl, I have my limits, ideas just sprang into my head and this story is going to be a few chapters longer than I had expected so. stay with me here! 


	12. Strength of the Heart

Wow, I took me a while but it seems I'm finally on my way out with this fic - .... sobs hahahaha! I almost forgot to post this chapter up! Hahaha! I was gonna skip to chapter 12! Jijiji...  
  
Strength of the Heart  
  
Something soft was under his cheek; he felt the light pressure of his face over what apparently was a futon. It was stuffy though, he felt like he had been in one position too long and was beginning to feel hot. Where was he though? The last thing he remembered was looking at Sango's worried face. His mind began to recall now. Everything that had happened who knows how long ago.  
  
Sleep leaving him, his other senses began to sharpen, he noticed the rain was no longer pattering rhythmically over the roof; it was reasonably cooler than it had been when he passed out, but opening his eyes blinking away his grogginess he noticed it was still dark.  
  
However he hadn't woken up on his own, Sango's worried voice had been in his dream seconds before he woke to find he hadn't been dreaming at all. It was accompanied by the loud voices of Inu-Yasha and Kagome sounding almost as frightened. Shino saw the blurry silhouettes of these people scuffle into the small room and tried to make out the individual voices of his friends to make sense of their urgent whispers.  
  
"Set him down there Inu-Yasha."  
  
Kagome.  
  
"Do you think he'll be ok?"  
  
Sango.  
  
"He'll be fine, listen there isn't much you can do for him with those injured hands of yours, so go tend to yourself first. He ain't going anywhere."  
  
Inu-Yasha.  
  
"Oh Sango-chan! Your hands!"  
  
"It's nothing Kagome. Inu-Yasha is he still bleeding?"  
  
"A bit. And were you listening to anything at all I said?"  
  
"Sango-chan I know you're worried about him, but Inu-Yasha is right."  
  
"But I --"  
  
"You're useless to him Sango. Go get yourself bandaged; I'll keep watch over him if it makes you feel better."  
  
Apparently nobody had noticed Shino was up and listening, his eyes having adjusted to the lack of light he distinguished three figures kneeling around a futon beside his own. Inu-Yasha was closest to him with his back turned waiting for an answer.  
  
"Come on Sango-chan, I'll help you with your hands and you'll be back here in no time."  
  
There was another pause then finally he heard a small "Un."  
  
He watched the shadow of Kagome head to the door and stop, waiting for Sango. She hesitated by the futon looking down to its occupant, and then got up slowly heading for Kagome. Sliding the shoji door gently he hear their footsteps disappear down the hall. Then turned back to face Inu- Yasha's back, hearing him give an angry sigh.  
  
"Dumb ass bouzu."  
  
"Let's go to Inu-Yasha's room so we don't wake up Shippou." Suggested Kagome as they walked down the hall.  
  
Her friend barely nodded as they made their way to the room, looking blankly at the floor. Kagome gave an unsure smile.  
  
"He'll be ok Sango; it was enough that you brought him all the way back here. Don't worry."  
  
Again all she did was nod. Kagome gave a small sigh as they entered the small room. Of course Sango had all the reason in the world to worry. Both Inu-Yasha and she had been horrified when she had come back panting half covered in blood and with Miroku over her back. The make- shift bandage he had over his back was where Sango's kimono had been torn off unceremoniously. His black gi was draped loosely over his back and his purple cloth draped clumsily over his half bare shoulders.  
  
On Inu-Yasha's petition 'What the fuck happened?!' Sango had somewhat explained what went on in their absence, no details of course, just the necessary things. Kagome gathered the healing supplies which she was convinced the group used way too much and waited as Sango changed back into her normal pink yukata and went to sit down in front of Kagome.  
  
"Oh my... Sango what happened to you?" asked Kagome gripping one of her hands  
  
"The parasite tried to take me up as a host." She explained.  
  
"But I thought you said you got rid of it."  
  
"I did."  
  
"Oh..."  
  
Not much else was said after that, the impatient worried look on Sango's face kept Kagome from talking. She had been in this situation many times before just as Sango had and knew no words could comfort or explain what had just happened. So not a big fan of silence she tried finishing up as soon as possible knowing everyone was waiting for her.  
  
With a small butterfly she finished wrapping Sango's bandages careful to leave her fingers unexposed knowing she would want to tend to Miroku.  
  
"Finished."  
  
Sango looked up at her friend giving her a grateful nod and the best smile she could express under such stressful emotions.  
  
"Arigatou Kagome-chan... you don't know how much ---"  
  
"Sango-chan, what would be the point of being your friend if I can't look out for you?"  
  
Sango nodded and gave her best friend a quick hug.  
  
"Daijoubu." Comforted Kagome  
  
Shinosuke from his position did nothing for quite a while. The next noise he heard was the sound of the shoji sliding open again, he didn't have to look up to know who was there.  
  
"Inu-Yasha, will you help me with the futon in my room." Came Kagome's voice  
  
"What about it?" he asked  
  
"Sango would like to sleep here, and I don't want to be alone at night." She answered  
  
Silence and then a worried "Eh?!"  
  
More silence "You dirty minded beast! Would you just come on!" she said in an urgent whisper  
  
Shinosuke felt the light current of air from Inu-Yasha lifting himself rapidly from the floor murmuring a small 'Feh.' hearing the faint rustle of his haori followed by various footstep and the barely audible whisper of Kagome's voice scolding Inu-Yasha,  
  
"Really Inu-Yasha how clueless are you?"  
  
He heard the rustle of the sliding shoji once again but never herd it seal against the wall.  
  
"Nani?" came Kagome's voice  
  
"What's wrong with your chest?"  
  
After Inu-Yasha's harsh question there was silence for a while before he pulled down her yukata just enough for them to see the red gash in her chest. He exploded. From the sound of it more than angry.  
  
"Dammit Sango, how could you do something as reckless as carry him back here with an injury like that?! Fuck it I don't know which one of you is more of a moron now! He's supposed to be the stupid one!"  
  
"Inu-Yasha!" came Kagome's voice again.  
  
"He's not helpless Sango, and he's probably been in situations a lot more screwed up than this, did you think of that? Did you think at all?!"  
  
"What the hell was I supposed to do? Leave him there unconscious and bleeding to death? And who do you think you are anyway?! You're one to talk about being reckless."  
  
"Guys..." interrupted Kagome nervously  
  
"Do you think Miroku would have let you come running back across the entire fucking town in your condition for his sake?!"  
  
"Yamete! Stop it! I'm sick of it! Let me?! It's not up to him or you or anyone else to decide about anything I do. When will everyone understand I'm not a porcelain doll that has to be protected and locked away. How come he can protect me at stake of his own life and I have to be the one to worry and suffer for him afterwards? It can't ever be the other way around can it?"  
  
"You're not helpless, he knows that. But when you make it your purpose to protect someone you love it's not easy to see them hurt, you're a woman, you wouldn't understand."  
  
Shinosuke could only imagine what Sango's face looked like right now. Inu- Yasha had made a mistake with that comment and he knew it.  
  
"I... wouldn't understand?..." she began obviously trying very hard to control the vibrating rage that emitted from her every word.  
  
"And I suppose I can't protect him because I'm a woman then ne?" came her voice, no longer raging and loud but low and cold "So I couldn't possibly understand what it's like to love a person so much you would be willing to give everything for them."  
  
The tension in the room felt terrible, it even made his stomach lurch when no one seemed to have the courage to say anything to Sango.  
  
"You know what, you're right Inu-Yasha." She began her voice dripping with sarcasm "Because of him I know only the heavy weight of guilt over my spirit when I see him laying over the futon because of me. I've memorized the awful sensation of dread and worry every time we're in a battle. And now I know what it feels like to be 'saved'."  
  
Silence rang in the room. He would have gotten up at that very moment just to end the horrible atmosphere as he could imagine his best friend and everyone else in there trying to decide what to do. Up to some point, the hanyou was right. As a man you 'had' to protect your woman, it was your purpose. Almost like a necessity. But, he had never thought about the woman's part in all of this, and taking in Sango' words, she was right. It was actually she that came out worse.  
  
"A person can only be so strong."  
  
Sango's small voice rang in their ears as silence embedded them again. Before heavy footsteps made their way over to where she was standing.  
  
"I know...." He was surprised that it was Inu-Yasha who spoke next "Try packing it on double knowing you failed to do what you practically live for." Said Inu-Yasha  
  
Everyone in the room turned to look at the hanyou. If he knew them well enough he could imagine the serious look on half youkai much like his tone of voice, the unsure eyes of Kagome over him and Sango looking up to him with a mix of uncertainty and understanding.  
  
"I guess you should tend to him now... but at least take one of those stick- on bandages Kagome has."  
  
The former courage was gone from his voice and it now sounded like he had become embarrassed by something. Shinosuke didn't blame him, if he were in his situation; he probably wouldn't have been able to say half the things he said in the first place. Inu-Yasha didn't wait for anyone to respond as he quickly exited the room, the girls were left in intrigue and only Kagome could go to clear up what had just happened, probably being as it was she that was the most interested.  
  
"Will you be ok Sango-chan?"  
  
Sango looked up to Kagome's anxious face and gave her a knowing smile nodding lightly.  
  
"Go see him." Said Sango to her already blushing friend  
  
Hesitating a bit Kagome pushed herself out of the small room "I'll be right back with your bandage. And if you need anything we'll be right there ne?"  
  
"Arigatou Kagome-chan."  
  
Shinosuke heard the shoji slid shut for what seemed the hundredth time that night followed by disappearing footsteps and finally a long sigh from Sango.  
  
The next thing he felt was the whisper of air as Sango kneeled down where Inu-Yasha had just been. She set, whatever it was she had in her hands beside her legs. He heard her shuffling unknown articles in her hands and the next thing he saw was the bright orange glow of a candle. He shut his eyes watching her turn towards him, not knowing why he didn't want her to know he was awake. She was probably just checking to see if her actions had woken him up.  
  
He heard a small mew he recognized as Kirara when Kagome came back with the bandage.  
  
"Arigatou Kagome."  
  
"Don't worry about it. And, if you can try to get some sleep ne?"  
  
"Un. Oyasumi nasai."  
  
"Oyasumi Sango-chan."  
  
Sure she was gone Sango gave out a sigh and placed the candle closer to Miroku's futon. She took the large bandage Kagome had delivered and shook off her yukata to her waist. With a damp towel she cleaned around the injury and holding her breath put a painful ointment over it Kagome had also brought for her. It stung, but this way it would heal quicker and not risk infection. She bandaged her chest shortly after and satisfied with her work slipped on her yukata again. Smiling she wondered what the monk would think if he knew she had been topless a few inches from him.  
  
Shino very tense finally opened his eyes again to see she had clothes back on and gave a sigh of relief. It wasn't as if he didn't like what he saw but... pushing aside weird thoughts he looked over at the man across from him.  
  
He was back side up just like him. With Sango intermediate he could only see from his head to his upper back. About at the height of his clavicles there was blood smeared all over his back, and even in the dim flicker of the golden candle he looked dreadfully pale, clammy and with an occasional bead of sweat sliding down his face.  
  
No wonder Sango was so worried, he didn't look good at all. And to think of what Inu-Yasha had said made him feel more astonished. 'He's probably been through worse things.'  
  
Meanwhile he noticed Sango had been rummaging through a health kit, sorting out bandages, some sort of ointment, some towels and something that made him sprout goose bumps. Now everybody had assured him he was a brave man, being a youkai exterminator and what not, but the sight of that needle and the thin portion of thread made his stomach jump.  
  
He heard Kirara mew once again watching his master take a small towel and submerge it in a small bucket of water. The feline youkai watched as Sango gently moved the cloth across his back soaking up both drying and fresh blood. Shinosuke watched with certain curiosity as the small nekko stood from her position beside her master and walked gracefully over to the monk's face. She looked sideways at him as if analyzing what he had done to end up like this. Squatting down she inched her way towards him and nudged him gently on the chin.  
  
"Kirara." Warned Sango rinsing the towel in the bucket.  
  
The youkai turned at her name to find her master looking down at her in warning. But seeing the curious almost humane expression her pet was giving her she couldn't help but give a small smile.  
  
"He's good at it ne?" she whispered to the nekko  
  
Passing the soaked towel over him again her smile tightened "Making you worry." She finished  
  
Kirara blinked up at her owner and gave a soft mew. When Sango didn't stop her work, her pet looked back at Miroku and set her head over small paws, staring at him from two inches away.  
  
Sango knew Shinosuke was up, she had felt him when Inu-Yasha and Kagome had left the room. And just now when she had pulled of her yukata. He was so tense it almost made her laugh. He had probably been up since they barged in here with Miroku. Getting back to what she had to do the smile on her face disappeared.  
  
She swore to herself she would never be a healer, she had trouble not sympathizing with the injured. Most of the time she imagined how they must feel and that kept her from doing anything to help them. Her mother would always tell her that it wasn't her that was suffering, but the patient, and her job was not to sympathize but to heal. She never could. Not even with Miroku who never so much as twitched in pain no matter what she was doing to him. His pain would always be hers, even the one he hid.  
  
After his back was relatively clean she took the ointment carefully dabbing a bit of disinfectant on the small wounds first. There had to be at least ten of them. The scrapes and the other wounds only needed a bit of cleaning.  
  
Finishing up the superficial cuts, she reluctantly put down the peachy red stained towel. Knowing what she had to do next she gave a quick sigh. The idea didn't get her to jump for joy. Her father used to tell her she was the best at mending; she hated it. Human skin was hard and every time you punctured through it besides feeling the hard puncture you also hear the way the skin popped making way for the expanding needle.  
  
She felt Shinosuke tense behind her once again when she collected the needle and took out the old thread still in the eye. He had been falling asleep a while ago, but she knew how much he hated needles. Funny as he had faced dozens of creatures with natural weapons so much more frightening that a simple sharp piece of metal or hard wood.  
  
Leaning in over the melting candle she inserted the slender piece of thread through the barely visible hole. Once done she took an approximate measure and cut the thread. She bent over him hesitating, looking over to his face with the needle inches away from his skin. She had healed Miroku dozens of times, if not more, she added sourly. While doing this she had seen he had had some of his own needlework done. The most noticeable scar on his left calf, and though the scar was quite long you could see from it that the person who had done it was also very skilled at what they did, she wondered if Moushin had been responsible for that. Not knowing why she doubted it.  
  
With all this present in her mind, it was the first time she did this to him. Her tired shoulders dropped slightly reminding her that she still had injuries of her own. Giving a secret sigh she set her hands over his back hopefully ready to begin.  
  
Six pages is my limit, if not I would have continued... am I realy that good at cliffies? evil smirk  
  
New chapters almost here!! . 


	13. Honorable

Ah the uncharted territory! Be prepared. Hehe, I didn't have a name for this one, sorry if it's lame, it was kinda last minute...  
  
Honorable  
  
Pain was the first thing her mind shouted when she woke up. She was barely aware that there was now sufficient light in the room for it to be noon. Blinking away the grogginess she turned left and right trying to get a better glimpse at where she was in order to understand why her neck felt like someone had stuck a knife through it.  
  
It was when she noticed someone was breathing under her that everything came back.  
  
She had finished the last stitch with burning fingers that told her to stop long ago, but enough will power to continue all night. The sun was slowly beginning to illuminate the room, though she still needed the light of the candle to tie the knot. She gave a light sigh once it was finished but knew she wasn't quite done with him yet. Shinosuke had been watching her, but had fallen asleep a while back.  
  
Taking a soft gauze she placed it over the lightly crumpled skin of Miroku's back. Then finally took the last piece of healing equipment she had brought with her. With a bit of trouble because of the injury on her chest, she managed to place the bandages around his back and middle. Tying the last knot between the two pieces of fabric she finally looked up.  
  
Shinosuke had fallen, and Kirara had cuddled along Miroku's futon close to his shoulder. With trembling hands she took what was left of the candle and blew out the steady flame. She felt as if someone had just done the same with her. The pain, stress and the overwhelming fatigue that had been pushed back in order to finish her work were now set loose in her body that didn't stand a chance.   
  
That had been... she didn't know how long ago. Careful as to where she put her arm, she tried her best to lift herself without brining any more pain to her already aching body. It didn't work. Her head was throbbing and she couldn't turn her neck before massaging it a bit. Looking to her lap she found a blanket that had slipped off when she had gotten up.  
  
Shinosuke. She thought turning to the empty futon. Giving a tired sigh she turned back to the futon to her left. The worry lingering over her lightened a bit when she saw him. At least his expression was calmer. He had a bit more color in his cheeks too. But until he was awake and she could slap him silly for pulling of such a stunt, she wouldn't be at peace.  
  
Thinking it was probably better to let everyone know that for now everything was all right, she pushed away the blanket and stood up, hearing about three of her articulations snap not being able to recognize them all.  
  
She blinked once she was fully upright. And not knowing if it had been a rush of blood to her head, or her lingering fatigue, she sunk down to her knees again with green dots flashing around her eyes. Steadying herself with her arms she heard Kirara give a soft mew. She hadn't even noticed she was still here.  
  
The nekko obviously worried jumped over to her master. Sango gave her a small smile.  
  
"Daijoubu... I just got dizzy that's all..."  
  
A light groan to her left caught her full attention as she turned to see an odd expression on Miroku's face. For a moment she thought something had happened to him, then she thought maybe he was finally going to wake up. When his eyes didn't open for a while, she was stuck with the idea that, either he was in pain... or dreaming.  
  
"It's only happened to you once... you hated it. Why do you do it to me?"  
  
Miroku looked down at soft brown eyes.  
  
"Sango...."  
  
"You hated it." she continued  
  
Before he could ask what she was talking about the white scenery they had been in began to sprout grass and trees filling up an orange sky above him, when he turned around to Sango again nothing but bushes where in her place... very large bushes.  
  
Actually everything in this familiar forest seemed to be bigger. Looking down at himself he recognized the yellow and brown clothes he was wearing. Impossible. Extending his hands he saw the shortened armguard around his right hand with no rosary of any kind.  
  
'I don't want you going past the line of trees Miroku....'  
  
With wide eyes he turned to the sound of that all too familiar voice. Where did it come from? It was like an echo inside his head. Searching for the bearer he noticed extremely tall trees all around him. The forest.  
  
A faint feeling of dread and melancholy began to bubble inside of him. The bushes a few feet away began to rustle. Giving a small gasp he turned to face the noise, regretting not having done as he had been told.  
  
He looked to the greenery long after it had stopped moving; sure that something else was going to happen.  
  
His breath got caught in his throat when suddenly the shrubs he was using as a hideout reveled something that looked like a lizard with much more teeth and claws than it was supposed to have.  
  
He fell back against his hands watching slowly as the reptile that seemed to be covered in thorns, outstretched its claws ready for the kill.  
  
"Miroku!"  
  
Hearing faintly the sound of his name and the rustle of the forest shrubs he felt something like a huge gust of wind pull him left, and knock him on the floor.  
  
By the time he recovered he heard footsteps rush over to him sliding to a stop taking a protective stand over his small body.  
  
"Chichi-ue..."  
  
"Kazaana!"  
  
The reptile, which had also been pulled to the floor, dug its claws into ground as a horribly strong and loud vacuum of air was aimed its way. Feeling scared Miroku hung tight to the leg of his father not knowing what was going on. It was until the forest floor finally gave way to the black hole that the lizard was sucked into his father's hand and his fist closed around the void stopping the strong current quite abruptly.  
  
Daring to open his eyes Miroku looked up to the figure looming over him panting as if he had just run a long distance. Then before anything could be asked his father dropped to his knees clutching his right hand tightly.  
  
"Chichi-ue!!"  
  
Smiling through the pain the young man looked up at his preoccupied son. "Daijoubu?" he asked.  
  
Miroku looked from his father, to the missing piece of earth, to his right hand. The bandages he normally used to hide the void where spread loosely over his arm being covered slowly by the small amount of blood in his fathers closed fist.  
  
"What happened to your hand?" asked Miroku, absolutely panicked.  
  
"I'm fine.... did it do anything to you? Are you hurt?"  
  
Miroku shook his head frustrated. He was fine, but his father was bleeding and in pain, to top it of because of something he had done, why couldn't he see that? Hadn't his father already told him that if he used the hole in his hand he would have to go sooner? He never used it.... why couldn't he see that?  
  
"Why can't you see that...?"  
  
Looking up he was back in the blank scenery, back to his normal height and age, and hearing her voice again.  
  
"You hated it... as do I."  
  
Looking at her figure he saw her in the red and white kimono she had showed up in the morning with. Her hair down, plastered against her face, drenched to the core panting silently. Looking just like she did the moment she had entered the cabin. With a sad face she took a hand to her chest in what seemed like a very painful movement.  
  
"Why can't you see...?"  
  
Her soft voice seemed to echo in his head for an eternity, yet he couldn't see her anymore. He couldn't open his eyes; they seemed to be glued together. He wanted to see, to see her...  
  
"Sango..."  
  
Finally he was able to unglue his eyelids to be received by temporary darkness clearing into a blur of brown and blue. It took him a few seconds to make out the shape beside him was human, and a few more to know who it was.  
  
"She went to eat something and clean herself up. I don't think she'll be long." He said  
  
While everything started coming back the man beside him smiled and began to rummage through some things.  
  
"Shinosuke?" asked Miroku finally.  
  
"Nani?"  
  
"How long has it been since....?"  
  
"Just yesterday... I'm surprised at how fast you recover."  
  
"What are you doing?" he asked noticing he wasn't just cleaning up the room but gathering his supplies.  
  
"I was staying only until I could thank you for everything you've done for me. Although I would have objected if I knew just what you were doing, but none the less you've saved my life. Arigatou gozaimasu, Miroku-sama." He bowed humbly  
  
"Ah... nandemonai. I'm just glad I could help. But have you told Sango that you plan to leave?"  
  
"I will when she comes back. No more secrets ne?" he smiled  
  
"Aa." He answered "Ano... could you help me stand up please? I can't seem to move anything below my neck more than 2 inches."  
  
"Of course."  
  
Wincing and cursing one or two times he thanked Shinosuke once he was sitting over his futon.  
  
"I think you should leave it there. Sango will have my head if she knows I did anything to move you."  
  
"Daijoubu, I'll handle her. She's gonna be fuming at me anyway, what's one more reprimand? Anyway all it takes is a gentle touch of her hand to calm her down."  
  
Shino chuckled "Hugs work wonders as well."  
  
"I'll remember that." Smiled Miroku  
  
A melancholic expression came to Shino's face looking back up at the monk. "I'm very happy with the decision Sango has made. She chose a very honorable man to fall in love with."  
  
Miroku smiled nervously. Any adjective but honorable would have been better.  
  
"I guess you could say I'm the closest thing Sango has got to a family. So I think it's proper that I say congratulations to you both and," he took an embarrassed pause "Also remember I care for her as well and want nothing but her happiness. I trust you Miroku. I believe you will also do anything and everything to keep her smiling. This is all I ask of you." He finished bowing.  
  
Miroku looked to the man before him with new eyes. He knew why Sango had chosen him in the past. It was very hard in these times to find such an honorable man. He should be proud; few men in this country had Miroku's admiration. He took a bow as well, as much as his back would let him.  
  
"Arigatou gozaimasu. A promise is a strong thing. I have made one to Sango, to you, and most importantly to myself. The day I break one willingly will be a day after eternity."  
  
Both pulled up with smiles. "I guess she's all yours now. Heavy hands and all." chuckled Shino  
  
"They complement the dagger glaring eyes." He smirked  
  
"Sou ka...?" interrupted a third voice from the door.  
  
Both twitched at the sound of her voice.  
  
"Lovely Sango! How are you this morning?" asked Miroku nervously.  
  
"Jumping for joy Houshi-sama." Sango raised an eye brow holding a tray with both tea and water in her hands  
  
The men chuckled nervously.  
  
"Shino... out."  
  
"Yes ma'am."  
  
Before Miroku could complain about how he was a coward, the mentioned was already running down the hall.  
  
"Mou..." he pouted  
  
"Ohayo gozaimasu Houshi-sama." Said Sango warningly approaching his futon.  
  
"Ohayo gozaimasu sweet Sango. You look lovely this morning."  
  
She said nothing. All she did was calmly begin to serve the tea. He decided not to say anything thinking it would be best to know how she was feeling this morning, or afternoon, or what ever time of the day it was...  
  
"You shouldn't be up. Have you eaten?" she asked  
  
"Iie. Not since.... breakfast... ano, yesterday." He shrugged  
  
She looked up with angry eyes but proceeded making the tea again. Some herbs he had seen and others that were new to him where being put into it. When she offered it to him he didn't hesitate or complain.  
  
Taking a small sip he tested the temperature. "Your tea is exquisite. It feels nice." He smiled letting the smell relax his sore throat.  
  
He was about to take another sip when something dropped gently over his lap.  
  
"Sango..."  
  
"Don't speak." She requested quietly from over his lap, "Just for a moment."  
  
He looked down at the chocolate blanket of her locks over his legs wondering if he should do or say something. Finally obeying her request, he set down the cup of tea next to the futon and set a gentle hand over her hair toying it smoothly.  
  
Making sure he had everything he took one last glance at his temporary room. Everything seemed to have happened a little fast now that it was time to go. Two days was nothing more that the blink of an eye, but this was the way it was meant to be.  
  
He would wait for her, just to say good bye, but it was best that he start now. He felt calmer now that he had spoken with the monk. Now he had to find the Hanyou, the girl and the little fox. Everyone had been kind and supporting with him. She had gotten lucky in finding such good friends. It was only fair considering everything she had already lost. Shaking off his melancholic mood he strapped his pouch on and reached for his Niken.  
  
Nothing was there.  
  
"Hello Shinosuke-sama."  
  
The voice chilled his blood. He had only heard it once before but would never forget it.  
  
"You failed me." It whispered.  
  
"It serves you right you know..." scolded Sango watching the monk with certain amusement.  
  
He would have answered had his mouth not been stuffed with food. Besides, she was right. He hadn't eaten in a day and was literally starving.  
  
"Only men can be this irrational. Or so Kagome-san says." Sango continued taking a sip of tea every once in a while.  
  
"I'm just glad this is over." She looked down at her cup.  
  
Finally swallowing a large amount of food he looked up at her serious face.  
  
A loud crash and a light shake of the earth interrupted their moment. Both turned worried to the origin as Sango rushed to the door. She opened it in time to see a flash of red and white shoot by. Inu-Yasha. Kagome ran just behind him.  
  
"Kagome!" shouted Sango as she passed "What's going on?"  
  
She stopped only a moment and faced Sango while she took an arrow from her back pouch.  
  
"It's him."  
  
°  
  
Him.... I couldn't decide if I should just leave it there or put what I had in mind from the beginning, but then I thought of the prologue, and had to put it in, either way it turned out all right. Um that thingy with Miroku was a dream-slash-memory in case you were wondering...  
  
review please!!! 


	14. Her Haunting Past

Action scenes here... no flames please, I tried my best. You people are insane to say I'm good at these things... . me getz confused!  
  
Her Haunting Past  
  
"Naraku." Hissed Miroku.  
  
"What?" asked Sango. Kagome was already running down the hall again after Inu-Yasha.  
  
"I can't believe I didn't feel him coming." Shouted Miroku already looking for his staff.  
  
"What are you doing?" Sango turned quickly.  
  
"I'm going." Miroku argued.  
  
"To do what? To die?! We're in no position to defeat him Houshi-sama, the most we'll be able to do is fend him off. I don't need you going to risk yourself just for that. Or is there really something you think you can do?" she argued while shaking off her yukata and putting her armor in place.  
  
He didn't have the chance to answer back as she quickly ran off with Kirara and Hiraikotsu over her shoulder. There was another loud explosion and Shippou's high pitched voice echoed in the distance.  
  
He growled.  
  
Sango jumped off the porch and caught site of the battlefield. Inu-Yasha was barely visible jumping from tree top to tree top slashing at whatever part of Naraku's beast was unprotected. As always he had sent one of his gruesome creations. This snake like creature hissed and lashed out at Inu- Yasha as well. It stood over two scaly feet ending in sharp black talons. At the end of its tail a large scythe of some sort countered with Inu- Yasha's Tetsusaiga.  
  
"Hiraikotsu!"  
  
The beast turned sharply to see the giant boomerang and ducked quickly, not before receiving a large gash in its side. It hissed loudly.  
  
"Sango-chan abunai!" shouted Kagome as the snake advanced quickly towards the inn. Katana out and ready she stood her ground ready to face the beast. But the threat did not come from ahead.  
  
"Sango!"  
  
Miroku's strained voice was the only thing that would have made her turn and see just what Kagome had wanted to warn her about.  
  
"No!" called out Inu-Yasha  
  
Kagome gave a squeal and covered her eyes not wanting to see what she knew would happen.  
  
Sango saw the familiar double bladed weapon come down over her. She didn't have enough time to make connections; the only thing clear was that she was going to die.  
  
The blade suddenly lost its fluid movement and made a harsh turn to the right nicking off her shoulder pad.  
  
What happened in the next two seconds she would figure out in a moment, when she was able to think again. The first thing she noticed was that the garden was no longer quiet with nervous anticipation. She wasn't even in the garden anymore.  
  
"Good girl Kirara!" she faintly heard Shippou shout out.  
  
The fire beast looked up worriedly at her master checking to see if she was all right.  
  
"Kirara." Sango said shakily, she gave a jumpy sigh and smiled at the cat. "Thank you so much!"  
  
Kagome was so flushed with relief all she could do was smile and whimper a small "Yokatta..." Inu-Yasha gave a nervous sigh. That was too close.  
  
Miroku from down at the inn took a shaking had up to his brow, recalling the scene that had been before him moments ago. He didn't remember ever having been so scared in his life.  
  
Sango had been distracted with the snake youkai. A shadow just behind her made its move. He recognized the taiji-ya outfit and the double bladed weapon. Miroku felt he had called out for her too late when Shinosuke raised his Niken over his head. Time stood still as Sango's ponytail snapped looking to the danger behind her. Shino's arm twitched and the weapon came down. His heart missed a beat.  
  
Seemingly coming out of nowhere Kirara jumped over Shino sending the Niken askew and leaving him on the floor. The youkai Sango had been waiting for lashed out next, but not before Kirara took her master over her back and out of harm's way.  
  
It was until then, he could breathe again. But the battle was far from over. Shinosuke recovered quickly snatching his Niken and heading to his closest opponent, Miroku. He clutched his staff, and for now, walking stick not sure if he could face him.  
  
A barrier of fire appeared between both of them, cutting off Shino's path; he turned to look at Kirara ready to fire again and to a preoccupied Sango.  
  
"Shinosuke? What's wrong?" she yelled  
  
Miroku saw just as he turned, the familiar blankness of his eyes right before he turned to face his friend and former love.  
  
"Sango, there is something controlling him."  
  
She tensed. This was too familiar  
  
"Inu-Yasha move!" Kagome's voice echoed in the wide space before one of her brilliant arrows flew through the air just missing Inu-Yasha into the youkai's chest.  
  
"Seriously do you have something against me?!" he yelled covering himself from the fragments of the exploding beast.  
  
"Grab the shard!" she yelled ignoring him.  
  
Landing expertly in the dirt, he shifted quickly back to where the monster had been, disappearing in the dust.  
  
Sango landed next to Miroku making sure he hadn't been hurt.  
  
"Daijoubu." He smiled  
  
He was almost sure she would start yelling at him now, or slap him or do anything but what she did.  
  
"Arigatou..."  
  
He turned quite confused to look up at her concerned face. Again they were interrupted, this time by the cry of pain from Inu-Yasha. He was suddenly and forcefully thrown out of the cloud of dust and landed not so gracefully a few feet away.  
  
"Inu-Yasha!" called out Kagome, already rushing to his side.  
  
Paying no attention to either the nasty gash between his neck and shoulder or Kagome, he took her in his arms and jumped out of the way not a second before one of the Niken's blades incrusted itself into the dirt along with a piece of Inu-Yasha's haori.  
  
He set down a dazed Kagome and looked down to what was left of his right sleeve. 'How the hell did he rip it so easily?'  
  
"Inu-Yasha!" Kagome's voice brought him back to reality  
  
Shino was inches from his face. Pushing Kagome down he felt a sharp numbing pain in his side. Kagome gave a choked scream and he got angry. Like Miroku, he had seen eyes like Shinosuke's too many times before. He pulled out Tetsusaiga.  
  
Sango gave a sharp gasp.  
  
"Does this seem familiar to you Taiji-ya?"  
  
His voice rang out turning heads everywhere. Everyone knew that voice.  
  
"Remember a blade slicing Kenji's back, tearing of Eiji's shoulder, going through Notaro's stomach, slicing Ryu's chest?... going through your father's head?"  
  
"Urusai! You've gone too far this time lowly bastard!"  
  
Sango was barely listening as Inu-Yasha gave that monster a piece of his mind. She was back at that castle that dreadful day. Remembering the noises, smells and visions.  
  
Inu-Yasha cursed as Shino took another swipe at him. He had fought a Taiji- ya before. Sango was much faster but Shino was stronger and his technique was different. The only thing left to do was knock him out until he had control over himself again.  
  
Planning his move quickly he stood his ground watching Shino charge at him, a foot away he unsheathed Tetsusaiga sending his Niken flying through the air. With Shino unarmed and vulnerable Inu-Yasha flicked his wrist and with the side of the weapon connected with Shino's side sending him rolling into a tree. He heard Sango's choked gasp.  
  
"If you ever fought a just battle we would have destroyed you long ago. Others fight and die for you, not even knowing why. You can't even have followers carry out your orders without manipulating their physical bodies." Lashed out Miroku setting a hand over Sango's shoulder.  
  
Inu-Yasha looked uneasily to Shino's shaking body then began looking for the culprit of this mess. "Come out you coward!"  
  
"Would you all like it if he could think for himself then?" asked Naraku coolly  
  
"Inu-Yasha!" yelled Shinosuke  
  
If it would have been anyone else's warning he wouldn't have hesitated so much, but coming from his own opponent he turned a second too late; a long metallic spear piercing his shoulder.  
  
"Ahh!"  
  
"Inu-Yasha!" cried Kagome  
  
"What the hell is this?! Inu-Yasha!" Shino yelled desperately "I don't...! I can't...!"  
  
Sango watched in horror as Shino with a terrified face pulled on the spear like weapon. Every hunter had his or her own hidden weapon in case of loss or fracture of the main one. Hers was the kodachi in her forearm. Shinosuke's was a sort of anchor. She had seen him use it a few times. It stayed embedded in the beast and the long metal chain attached to it allowed you to haul the creature. Like a fishing rod. Only he used it in a much crueler way.  
  
Kagome squealed as Inu-Yasha crashed against the ground, some trees and the ground again.  
  
"No!" yelled Shinosuke  
  
"Bastard." Breathed Miroku through clenched teeth. "He's given Shinosuke back his consciousness, but not his body. He knows what he's doing but can't do anything about it."  
  
Sango's stomach jumped. Meanwhile Inu-Yasha found a way to counter with Shino's technique. About to slam him into a tree Inu-Yasha gave a flip so his feet connected with the bark. Using it as leverage he pushed, flying towards Shino. His fist connected with Shino's side.  
  
Both gave a yell of pain hitting the floor. Inu-Yasha somewhat recovered and roughly pulled the serrated spear out of his shoulder, groaning and falling to his knees.  
  
"Inu-Yasha!" called out Kagome at his side immediately  
  
The poison was beginning to work it's effect. Sango's fist clenched.  
  
"NARAKU!" Sango yelled her eyes glossy. "Face me you bastard!" she poised Hiraikotsu  
  
"Maa maa Sango, don't get so upset. Shino is thinking for himself remember?" he mocked.  
  
Miroku clenched his teeth. Inu-Yasha was out of battle for now, out of the corner of his eye he could see Kagome tending to his wounds and the poison. Then a quick movement to his right caught his eye.  
  
"Sango!" two voices shouted in unison.  
  
The Niken was once again coming down over her, only this time she was ready. Her adrenaline high, she channeled the bubbling rage within her to the cool movements of her boomerang and katana. She had fought with Shinosuke tons of times before. This one was no different. He didn't have control over his body but it still had the same limitations and abilities.  
  
"Sango..." he said worriedly between breaths  
  
She countered his Niken with Hiraikotsu and flicked her katana. "I won't let him have you Shino."  
  
"You don't understand." He said making another horizontal slash.  
  
"I'll save you Shino." She ducked quickly and took a swipe with Hiraikotsu  
  
"Sango." He blocked with his Niken.  
  
"You want his freedom then take the shard out of him." Explained Naraku  
  
A shard, just like her brother. She had imagined something of the sort. But this time Shino's life didn't depend on it. "Kagome!" she turned to her friend. "The shard."  
  
With fear and sadness in her eyes Kagome hesitated before lifting a hand to the hollow of her neck tapping it twice. Sango's heart dropped.  
  
In the distance Naraku's laughter erupted throwing off Sango's concentration. Shino's fist connected with her cheek bone, followed by a hard kick to her side.  
  
"Sango!" called Miroku and Shino. Clutching her stomach with one hand she held up Hiraikotsu to shield herself from his Niken. Her cheek was bleeding.  
  
"Time is running out for you, I would be more careful with that chest wound. Let me know what you decide. Will or won't Shino come back to me, to fight alongside your brother. Choose well taiji-ya. For now I have no reason to stay."  
  
"Piece of filth!" Kagome hissed.  
  
"Naraku! Don't you dare leave!" yelled Inu-Yasha from his position on Kagome's lap "More of a coward every time we see you! Now you won't even stay to watch the destinies you have changed!"  
  
Miroku looked up to the laughing monster floating away on his cloud of darkness. The thing he hated most about this fight with the demon was not having to go searching from town to town for him. It was not the desperate feeling of defeat every time they faced him. Not the injuries or the attacks.  
  
What he hated the most, was his hatred itself.  
  
The way his blood boiled from frustration every time he hurt someone he loved. The way his fingers would dig into the skin of his palm. The void in his stomach knowing he would smile while tearing Naraku's body apart, seeing him scream and suffer in pain for everything that he had done.  
  
For Inu-Yasha, Kagome, Shippou, his father, Shinosuke. And Sango. It scared him at times. It was too much of one feeling so negative and consuming. Being poked at and growing every time Naraku had the last laugh.  
  
"SANGO!"  
  
Everyone turned to the desperate voice of Shinosuke. Watching the quick movements by both hunters and enduring the dreadful silence afterwards. Everything stopped. Not a breath was taken or expelled. Not a finger twitched. No one cared about Naraku anymore. Everyone's eyes seemed to be glued to Sango's katana, as still as everything else surrounding them.  
  
She knew she should be in pain, as Shino's Niken was incrusted in her shoulder, but all she could see now was the desperate shaking of his eyes. Both stood stiffer than stone. Only their eyes showing the fear within them both. Sango's katana only touching Shino's neck. No one dare moved for the longest time.  
  
Shippou whimpered against Inu-Yasha when Shino shut his eyes tightly.  
  
"Sango..." his Niken trembled. "Please do it..."  
  
His weapon was literally in her body, with a flick of his wrist he could kill her easily, just as much as she could extend her elbow and end his life.  
  
"Please!" he said a little louder trembling more. "I don't want to be your burden, I don't want to be Kohaku!" he shouted.  
  
Tears streaming down her emotionless face gave away what she was feeling inside.  
  
"I can save...." she began with a cracked voice.  
  
"You already have!" he shouted. Fear in his words as the Niken turned slightly in her shoulder.  
  
"Now it's my turn..." he tried for a smile. With every once of strength and will power he had, he concentrated everything in moving his left hand. Gritting his teeth he forced his arm up, trying his best to place his hand over hers; still clutching the katana so tight her fingers were white.  
  
"He won't win." He told her  
  
Miroku looked with wide eyes to the man in front of Sango. "No..." he pleaded silently.  
  
"Shinosuke..." her eyes widened in fear.  
  
He smiled, trying his best to comfort her; she hadn't taken her eyes of his. "Daijoubu Jou-chan... remember..."  
  
She shook her head. "No!" she pleaded him  
  
"My love will always be yours Sango...."  
  
"Shinosuke!"  
  
"I will always love you."  
  
Eyes widened everywhere.  
  
His hand pulled on hers.  
  
"NO!"  
  
°  
  
sobs! oh my! I got kinda carried away whimpers I uh... sobs louder damn, I didn't know I'd grown so fond of him! Ohhh, well this is and angst fic, and in my defense I had planned to kill him from the start, but then again I had planned to make him a jack ass... ohhhh! sobs  
  
Anywho, this is it, last chapter. Hope you enjoyed!  
  
But before you start with the death threats there will be an epilogue. Hehehe, (do you really think I would do that to my dear readers?! I'm not that evil!) I can't bring him back to life you know but I'll try for a bitter sweet ending   
  
By the way, I kept my promise to you being as this is the last chapter I uploaded it before the end of June. Now the epilogue won't take much longer either but I'm having trouble with my phone so I can't guarantee anything before July, but that's just if the phone goes haywire, if it doesn't I don't see why I can't upload it before July. hehe.  
  
Review! ¬¬ without the death threats please... 


	15. A Piece of Your Heart

Well, this is it, the last stretch. Um, I'll put the A. note at the end so you don't have to read it. . and yes, me and my famous dream sequences! I had to make one for the end! (°°°)

A Piece of Your Heart

°°°°°°

She tried pulling back as she felt the tug of his hand over hers.  
  
Kagome gave a shriek. Inu-Yasha gave a choked gasp. Shippou yelled against Inu-Yasha's haori.  
  
"NO!" she yelled at the same time Miroku choked it out.  
  
"No..." Miroku whispered again.  
  
The shiny steel penetrated his neck coming out the other side along with the bloodstained shard. She couldn't breathe when his grip suddenly grew flaccid. She let go of her katana stumbling back a few paces and falling on her legs, at the same time she heard his body drop. The metallic clank of her sword was numbed by his flesh. It was still in him. Taking her hands to her face she let herself fall to the grass where she curled up against her body tears flowing freely from her closed eyes.  
  
A warm hand came over her shivering body. She knew who it was but didn't care. How could he bare to touch her? She had killed her best friend. She broke down sobbing and felt his chest come over her shoulder. He lowered his arm to her back as the other took her hands gently away from her face. He then set his cheek over hers. Whispering words of comfort. His body was protectively over her frail shivering one, his breath tickled her cheek and his scent enveloped her softly. But she didn't care. Nothing mattered. Death was the only reality.  
  
"Jou-chan...."  
  
She peeked through teary eyes. Darkness was what she received. Miroku was gone.  
  
"Jou-chan...?"  
  
She shut her eyes again, tighter this time so she could block out that voice.  
  
"Jou-chan!"  
  
Her mind snapped. And her eyes flew open.  
  
He chuckled "It was about time."  
  
She searched all around; it was dark, but not pitch black. It was just night. Stars shone merrily over the field full of white flowers tainted blue by the moons glow.  
  
"Hi..."  
  
Her hair snapped as she turned afraid the voice might disappear. What she saw made her go weak in the knees.  
  
Shinosuke a foot away smiled up to her and patted the grass beside him, signaling her to sit next to him.  
  
She was confused, surprised and a little scared, but her body carried her next to him anyway and she settled down beside him quietly.  
  
"Sorry for the interruption. I actually shouldn't be here but I needed to talk to you." He continued.  
  
She needed to say a lot as well. But she didn't really want to, or at least couldn't for now, so all that was left was to listen.  
  
"Everything is as I guessed it would be after my departure. Even you and that concerns me." He turned to look at her with a serious face that then gave a small grin "That wasn't exactly what I had in mind for my good-bye, but you know I've never really liked farewells."  
  
Questioning brown eyes looked into deep blue ones. He chuckled.  
  
"You did good Jou-chan. I know you don't feel like it, but I owe you something more important than life itself. Thanks to you I have my freedom, and I have my happiness. That's something I'll never be able to repay you for. It wasn't the prettiest way to get it I agree, but... well it's complicated, you'll know in good time."  
  
"I just came to say, in a way, goodbye. And of course to calm you down after what happened. I know nothing even I say will lessen the pain, so I'll let you mourn in peace. Right now I'm kinda going for your guilt thing."  
  
Sango suddenly looked down at her lap, very ashamed that she was looking at him in the eyes. He frowned.  
  
"Sango... would you like to live in darkness for years and wake up to see you have killed many people and done horrible things to the people you love?"  
  
She looked up to comprehensive eyes.  
  
"The day I came back to the village, he was there waiting for me Jou-chan. It was a setup from the beginning. Of course I didn't know about it, I would have told you something as important."  
  
She raised an eyebrow  
  
"I know I know, but this I would have told you about. Or tried to avoid you true, but the thing is, there, would have been nothing you could have done anyhow. I had two choices, Naraku or death. Kohaku didn't get to make that choice it was made for him. In the end you will understand there are no such things as coincidences; the only thing that exists is that which is inevitable."  
  
She looked up at him strangely, trying to figure out if this really was Shinosuke and trying to comprehend his last sentence. He looked down at her wondering if she had understood.  
  
"Anywho, everything happened for a reason. And even if it sound's lame, one day you'll understand. That's pretty much what I wanted to tell you, and it seems..." he looked to the horizon and to the approaching dawn standing up slowly. "I'll have to go soon."  
  
Her eyes widened as she shot up as well. He smiled  
  
"I don't belong here anymore Sango."  
  
Her brows dropped.  
  
"I'll miss you deeply, but remember death is only death and without it there can be no life."  
  
The sun was too bright, she could barely see him or anything anymore, all she saw was white. Something soft and warm came down to her forehead and gave her a soft peck. She blushed not being able to see if what she felt had really happened.  
  
"Thank you for everything my little lady..."  
  
"Shinosuke...."

°°°°°°

Her eyes opened slowly. Adjusting to the darkness she saw the branches of the tree tops swaying rhythmically in the wind. The stars peeked through the leaves and the moonlight dripped between them to the forest floor.  
  
"Yume ka?" she whispered. This was her reality. Tears formed at the corners of her eyes and sank down into her hairline when she closed her lids again.  
  
The smallest smile tugged at her lips when she opened them again. 'I'm sorry I worried you so much Shino.'  
  
A warm pleasant breeze blew through their small campsite. The dying embers of the fire glowed once again and the leaves and branches jingled playfully. Her hair swayed gently as the tracks of her tears dried away slowly.  
  
Her smile widened.  
  
-----  
  
It had barely been a week. She had been shattered the first two days and hadn't smiled since then. He hadn't tried anything with her. He knew where the line was drawn. Sometimes she would cry at night. She had barely slept since it happened. When she did she would wake up from that cruel nightmare.  
  
They hadn't spoken, but he knew. He felt it. Miroku sighed into the night and with the help of his staff got to his feet to return to the camp. His wounds were better but not fully healed. He gave thanks to Kami-sama there hadn't been any serious attacks lately. Sango still had some problems with her left shoulder, and was still wearing the sling. Everything was a mess.  
  
A warm breeze that had come from the forest came up over his back and pushed his hair against his nape and face. He closed his eyes letting his hair tickle his cheeks. It felt wonderful. He wondered why he had been filling his mind with worries just a second ago.  
  
His eyes snapped open and his brows furrowed. 'It can't be...' he thought.  
  
"Shinosuke?" He asked no one.  
  
Turning back to where the wind had come from he was met with a distant pink yukata. He looked to her wondering why she was here and feeling in the air that something had changed. He raised his eye brows when Sango smiled as the last whisk of air circled her softly and disappeared into the night.  
  
"Wakatta..." he whispered and smiled.  
  
He waited patiently until she was by his side. They both looked into the warm night for a while before Sango finally made herself comfortable in the tall grass sitting over her legs. He looked down at her movement.  
  
"I'm sorry... I worried everyone didn't I?" she asked softly  
  
"You have no reason to apologize to me or anyone, mourning is something we all did in this last week." He answered neutrally  
  
She shook her head. "I was mourning for the wrong person."  
  
He kept her eyes on her serene figure and finally decided to say something.  
  
"I'm glad he made you realize that. But if you had not shown that shred of weakness you would have scared everyone to death. Remember there cannot be life without death, light without darkness, or strength without weakness..."  
  
She looked at him seemingly shocked. He smiled.  
  
"What kind of Houshi would I be if I could not detect a visiting spirit?"  
  
She looked down at her knees. Well he did have a point. She smiled again. "He had this thing about breaking rules." She set her head over her knees "I'll miss him..."  
  
"Every person you love will take with them a piece of your heart when they leave. That void will difficultly be filled again." He contemplated.  
  
She looked up to him again to find him gazing into the night sky. "Unless some one gives you a piece of theirs ne?" she smiled  
  
He looked down at her surprised by her logical yet deep conclusion. "If you decide to accept it of course."  
  
"I would give him all that I am in hope for a piece of his heart." she gazed into the night.  
  
"Well that wouldn't be very fair for you."  
  
"I don't believe so because in the end we would be part of each other. Like night and day, light and dark. Life and Death. Yet we would be free to be together."  
  
'Free...?' he looked down at his Kazaana.  
  
His right fist clenched "Someday...." he whispered. ----°---- OWARI! T-T sniffles well it was fun, a little freaky with the fall of my inspiration, but I hope I haven't disappointed you. I like waff, but in context; in an angst fic well it would seem a little out of place ne?... and since I'm supposed to be following the original story I didn't make any advances on their relationship visible wise. I realize I kinda made Sango a martyr here and it's the first time I do an angst so I may have screwed up or exaggerated but, I'm not that upset with how it turned out...  
  
Oh and I think this last piece is better as a chapter than it is an epilogue that's why I changed it, even if it means I couldn't keep my promise! T-T which leads to my next point.  
  
THANK YOU! Thank you every single one of my readers, even those who didn't review (but especially the ones that did!) for putting up with me, through my dark months and to the end of this my deepest story yet. Thank you to my original readers who believed in me to finish the story, and who came back after the horribly long 'break' I took! It flatters me that some of you think I have talent ' and you wish I could write more, believe me, I wish I could too! But for now I'm a little tied up with life it's own. I warn you, the transition between adolescence and adult hood sucks! .  
  
So once again thank you, I had a blast and I hope sessha could do something to make your day a little better. Or at least not bore you! .  
  
Til next time  
  
Betty 


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